


♫ I Can Be Your Hero, Baby ♫

by brangelina_of_the_gallaghers



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Hand Jobs, M/M, Sambriel BROTP, Sexuality Crisis
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-19
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2018-04-21 13:13:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 42,735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4830368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brangelina_of_the_gallaghers/pseuds/brangelina_of_the_gallaghers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A traditional high school romance with a few problems thrown in.<br/>Dean moves to Castiel's town and they hit it off immediately. Some self-exploration, an illness and lots of sex later, their story is told.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. ♫ I Can Be Your Hero, Baby ♫

**Author's Note:**

> And so it begins.

At the start of their senior year, a new boy started at Dodge City High School. It didn’t take long for Castiel to find out this new kid’s name was Dean Winchester and he was 17. Almost immediately, he knew that he’d transferred from Wichita High along with his younger brother Sam. Sam was a freshman and apparently a ‘frikkin genius’. They’d lived in Kansas all of their lives and had moved to Dodge City from Wichita over the summer.

Castiel was also in his senior year. Some people claimed that HE was a ‘frikkin genius’ but that was mainly his half-brother, Gabriel. Gabriel had done some research on Sam and Dean. He’d found out that Dean was in Castiel’s English and Chemistry classes and his Calculus class. Gabriel was very much the centre of attention at high school. He was the class clown. He was a huge MARVEL fan and even called himself Loki.

Sam and Gabriel had hit it off instantly. Surprisingly, Gabriel welcomed Sam into his group of friends (despite Sam being four years younger). He claimed he wanted an apprentice and Sam was just the person. They bumped into each other by their lockers and Gabe introduced him to everyone important enough to associate with the Novaks. Cas thought it was just Gabriel lining Sam up for one of his classic pranks. Actually, everyone thought that, including Sam. They exchanged phone numbers and were texting each other almost constantly. Sam thought there was probably something ‘fishy’ about it so he was careful with what he said. He noticed that Gabriel was totally serious when had basically vented his whole life, Sam felt more comfortable and started sharing information about his life too. Gabriel had told him that he had a few half-siblings and lots of cousins. He lived with his nerdy half-brother called Castiel, an older one called Balthazar, but he doesn’t really live at home anymore, a younger half-sister called Anna and two of his cousins, Naomi and Ezekiel. He shares a Dad with Castiel but has a different Mother. He also has cousins called Crowley, Meg, Michael and Lucifer. When Gabriel received a text that simply said ‘LUCIFER?!?!’ he was informed that their family is religious and believe all angels are good angels. He didn’t explain why Crowley and Meg were named after Demons. In return, Sam told Gabriel that he had an older brother called Dean, who was a perfect example of an alpha male.  
~

One day into their new school and Sam was already well underway with his studies. Immediately, he was set a history project. They had to work in pairs. Sam had been put with Anna. He was a little apprehensive about being thrown in at the deep end to settle in but from what Gabriel had told him, Anna seemed like a nice person.

They had agreed that their first study session outside of school would be at Anna’s, due to the fact that things were still a bit messy in the Winchester household. So, just two days into term Dean was driving Sam around to a ‘friend’s’ house. This is when Dean first met Cas. They had a brief conversation before Cas explained he was in the middle of a film. He reluctantly asked Dean if he wanted to come in a watch for a bit whilst Sam and Anna were working. Obviously, Dean agreed.

Dean hadn’t made any friends yet. Well, he had a ‘kinda sorta friend’ called Benny, but that was it. He was hoping this meant that he had a chance to get to know some other people. He’d heard that Castiel was quite popular. So, he entered Castiel’s home. It was large and posh. The kitchen must have twice the size of the kitchen in which Dean’s mother cooks. They made their way through the grand rooms to Castiel’s ‘den’. The movie had been paused. Dean wasn’t sure what it was. When Castiel pressed play, Dean tried working out the storyline but it was too nerdy and complex. Consequently, he zoned out. He realised he’d dozed off as the credits rolled. “Damn” Dean exclaimed as he awoke.

“What?” Castiel replied.

“I fell asleep?”

“Oh, that!”

“Sorry!”

“Don’t worry. You weren’t enjoying it anyway, were you?”

“I hoped I’d understand, but I’m afraid I didn’t”

“Don’t worry”

“Deeeeeaaaaannnnn” they heard a tired voice getting closer from behind.

“Hey, Sammy” Dean replied with a sigh.

“We’re done for now”

“Okie dokie. We better get off home then.” They stood up and started walking away before Dean turned around and said “Thanks, Castiel”

“You’re welcome, Dean. Call me Cas, Castiel is a stupid name”

“Okay. Bye Cas”. Dean and Sam walked out of the house and got into what Dean called the perfect car and drove home. The whole time Dean was teasing Sam about Anna. After just a few hours Dean had got it into his head the Sam had a ‘thing’ for Anna. Dean knew his brother well.  
~

Dean didn’t have English until three days into the year. It seemed weird but he’d had to miss the first few lessons due to briefing about the new school and a ‘get to know you’ session with the principle. In these two lessons, the rest of the class had learned a lot and Dean was dreading his lesson because he knew he was already behind. When he entered the classroom, the teacher wasn’t already in there. He wasn’t sure what to do so he just hovered by the door until the teacher entered. Mrs Harvell greeted him and asked him a bit about himself. She told him to take a seat. The only empty seat in the room was next to Cas. His bag was on the seat but he eagerly moved it and motioned for Dean to sit down  
next to him.

The lesson was boring. Really boring. Thankfully, lunch proceeded but it couldn’t have come fast enough for Dean. He was in way over his head in that lesson. During the lesson, he had apologised, once again, to Cas for falling asleep on his sofa. Cas was still fine with it. He even asked if Dean wanted to eat with him. Dean, graciously, took him up on that offer and saw it as an opportunity to mingle with new people. It didn’t turn out well. He dragged Dean over to the corner table where they sat alone. Dean was confused. When he thought back, he realised that Cas had sat here whether on his own or with friends for the past few days. They just made small talk.  
He looked around and noticed that the cafeteria was oddly quiet. “Where is everyone?”

“The game!”

“Game?”

“The Red Demons are playing today”

“What sport?”

“Baseball” Cas explained. “You’re not allowed to come to this school and not follow sports!” Cas proceeded to tell him everything about the school sports teams.

“You’re into sports?” Dean asked.

“No, but you learn everything through time.” Cas continued, “Especially when you have friends like mine. They’re obsessed.”

“Hence, none of them are here today?”

“Correct. I do take interest but it’s not worth missing school. If there’s a home game, I go and watch. Are you athletic?”

“Yeah. Sam describes me as an ‘alpha male’”. Dean explained.

“Really?” Cas laughed.

“Well, a PERFECT alpha male, to be precise”

“Is that an accurate description?” Cas’ voice was very monotone. It was always serious and it sounded like he was always confused. He tilted his head slightly to the side as he awaited a response.

Dean replied with a quiet “Yeah. I suppose it is....”

“There’s nothing wrong with that.” Cas said comfortingly. “Women are attracted to alpha males, aren’t they?”

“True.” He paused. “So, if you’re not an alpha male, is it your kind personality that attracts the ladies?” Dean said smugly.

“I... I don’t” Cas hesitated. “It’s not really something that concerns me.”

“Oh. Dude. You should be such a chick magnet!” Dean said with enthusiasm. “Why don’t you dive right in there and grab a girl?” He continued. “You have lovely personality, from what I can tell. You seem to genuinely care, people aren’t warm hearted nowadays.” He didn’t stop “and you know... you’re not bad looking, dude”

An obvious blush appeared on Cas’ pale skin at Dean’s comment. “No, you don’t understand.” Cas paused “Thank you for the complements but I didn’t mean that girls don’t go for me. I mean I don’t go for girls...”

“Oh, sorry dude” Dean thought through what he needed to say very carefully.

Cas beat him to it. “I don’t know why I just told you that!” He looked shocked. “I’ve never told anyone that before....” Silence. “Crap...” He got up to leave and Dean grabbed his arm as he walked away, pulling him back down.

“You know I won’t blab, don’t you?”

“I hope you stick to that statement, Dean. Thank you”

“I mean it Cas.”

“Thanks.” He said settling back down.

“What’s making you keep that to yourself?”

“People. You know how people can be. I don’t know whether they’ll accept me or exclude me. I don’t know whether they will tease me or praise me. I don’t know if they’ll be scared of me or proud of me. I don’t think there is another gay guy in this school. If there is, he wouldn’t go for me anyway, would he?”

Dean didn’t know how to react to Cas’ rant. He basically confessed to someone who is practically a stranger all of his thoughts and insecurities. Dean wasn’t sure why. “Don’t be too hard on yourself. People DO suck, I’ll admit that. However, I know this will sound cliché, but the decent people, the people who deserve to be your friends, won’t judge you for it” Dean got goosebumps.

“Thank you, Dean. That means a lot, it really does.” He paused. With a voice that Dean would describe as sarcastic (for Cas, anyway) he said “Maybe not just yet!” With that he stood up, stuck his tongue out playfully to Dean and left. Dean smiled before he too, stood up and headed to his next class.  
~

The following morning Dean was stood at his locker, sorting out his books, when he saw Cas approaching. He was preparing an opener in his head as he noticed Cas stop and talk to a girl in a cheerleader’s outfit. Dean smiled to himself as he made a mental note that he is becoming friends with a popular guy. When he heard the girl, which he’d worked out was Lisa, ask for Cas’ number Dean quickly got out his phone and added a contact as he heard Cas recite it.

Cas approached Dean to say hello but Dean got nervous and blurted out “ENGLISH?” signalling they should walk and talk. They made idle conversation on the way to class before sitting down together and taking notes. The lesson ended and they all packed up all their stuff to leave when Mrs Harvell told them all to retake their seats. There was a huge sigh coming simultaneously from the mouths of around forty teenagers. She set an assignment to do with a partner. “You have two weeks. You can work with whoever you want, as long as the work is done and to high standards!” Cas looked at Dean, Dean looked at Cas and they both nodded. With that, there partnership began.


	2. ♫ I Can Kiss Away the Pain ♫

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't get much feedback (good or bad) on the last chapter so I'm hoping no news is good news and you don't hate it. 
> 
> For story's sake, I've changed Dean's birthday.

Due to the fact, Sam and Anna still had an assignment to finish, and now Dean and Cas had one of their own, they figured they’d work at the same time. Cas and Anna walked over to the Winchester household the following weekend. It was a very sunny day so, although it was a long walk, they didn’t mind. Gabriel had tagged along; he didn’t like being home alone. He insisted on getting an ice cream on the way.

When they arrived, Sam was in his room. Dean sent Anna through before settling at the kitchen table with Cas and Gabriel. They discussed their assignment for a bit before they got bored and Dean offered them some cherry pie. It was to die for. They proceeded to go through to the living room and watch the first Fast and Furious film rather than work.

Cas had never seen any films like this before. He liked films that made you think but had an easy storyline. Basically, films the opposite of the Fast and Furious franchise. However, surprisingly, he enjoyed it. He proceeded to recite a list of things he liked about it. They weren’t the obvious good things about the movie. Dean and Gabriel like car chases, whereas Cas commented on the lighting of the nitrous oxide from underneath the cars and how it... something. They made small talk for a while before Sam and Anna came downstairs. The younger pair decided to go and sit in the garden to talk for a while whilst it was still sunny. Gabriel tagged along claiming he wanted fresh air and not admitting he felt like he was third wheeling.

“I could set you up with her, you know?” Anna spoke teasingly to Gabriel. He had been talking about Jessica, one of Anna’s friends. She was a sophomore and on the cheerleading squad, she was pretty, and she was ‘bendy’. Everything Gabriel wanted in a girl.

“Oh ha ha!” Gabriel replied sarcastically before having second thoughts and saying “Weeeell, I suppose, if you’re offering, I could take you up on that.” With that, Anna and Sam burst out laughing, keeling over and clutching their stomachs. It shouldn’t be that funny, but it was. Sam was laughing at Anna laughing, Anna was laughing and Sam laughing and neither could stop.

“So, how about you two?” Gabriel butted in, trying to get them to calm down.

“What about us?” Sam said through the laughter.

“When are you going to grow some balls and ask my little sister on a real date?” Gabriel said with a smug smile.

“NEVER!” Sam argued. He then looked to Anna and saw the slightly saddened look on her face before adding “wait, that sounds mean. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with you; obviously, I’m just saying I’d find it a little weird”. He turned to Gabriel, who was apparently his current best friend, and scowled.

“ _Anyway_... I’ll leave you two love birds alone” Gabriel said as he stood up and walked off. This just left an awkward silence between Sam and Anna. They turned to each other, just looking, before he caught a glimpse of her sky blue eyes and went in for a kiss. She reciprocated.

* * *

“Why so happy, Sammy?” Dean said in the car on the way to school the following day.

“Oh, nothing.” Sam replied, though the grin remained evident in his face.

“ _Sam._ ”

After a moment if dekiberation, he chimed in and said “I just, kinda... kissed Anna yesterday...”

“Well, done Sammy. You work fast. I have trained you well”

“Pahaha! You’ve trained me, have you? Which one of us is currently more successful? Hmmm?” Sam said in a self-satisfied way.

“Oh shut up!” Dean insisted.

“You should see her eyes, Dean”. Sam smiled to himself. “They’re the perfect blue.”

“Must run in the family then” Dean replied with an identical smile, before realising how that must have sounded and blushing. Thankfully, Sam didn’t pick up on this.

~

Dean sat in Physics, learning some crap about ultrasound, and all he could do was daydream about next period. He knew that in an hour he would be sat next to Cas. FINALLY the lesson ended and he slipped out fast. He headed straight to English and beat Cas there. He knew that this lesson would just be discussing their assignment; therefore, he knew they would actually have to concentrate in this lesson, seeing as though they ended up watching a film instead of working the previous night they were already behind schedule. When Cas arrived they got straight to work. They hadn’t made enough progress by the end of the lesson so agreed they needed to meet up outside of school again.

* * *

At around 1800 Dean and Sam got into the Impala and headed to Cas’. It was Friday night so they didn’t have many restrictions. Sam and Anna had practically finished their assignment so they didn’t plan on working. Gabriel still didn’t know about the kiss and had invited Sam around to hang out with him. Sam had no intention to stay with Gabe.

“Hey, Sammy. How are you doing?”

“I’m okay, Gabe. How are you?”

“I’m fine. Listen, I just got these awesome new lollipops. You HAVE to try one. It’s like an orgasm in your mouth, no jokes.”

“Sure. I thought I’d go and work with Anna for a bit though.”

“Yeah but Anna said you’d almost finished so I figured you have some time to kill. Some time you could spend with a friend rather than a classmate.”

“Okay. Not too long though.”

“Awesome.” They were just passing past Anna’s bedroom door so Gabriel knocked. “Anna, Sammy’s here.”

She came rushing out and grabbed his hand when she realised Gabriel wasn’t watching. “I’m stealing him from you for a while. You could you join us if you want.”

She followed the two boys and they all went to sit on Gabriel’s bedroom floor and began to idly chat. “You actually persuaded her to go on a date with him?” Sam asked Anna.

“Yeah. It turns out Jess has always though Gabe was cute. They’re going out next Saturday.”

“Right, Sammy. It’s time you asked my sister on a date. She can’t be the only Novak that doesn’t have someone.”

Both of the younger children blushed. Anna broke the awkwardness by pointing out that “Cas doesn’t have anyone.”

“Cassie has Dean. They just haven’t realised yet. Sammy, ask now!” Gabe ordered.

“I don’t think so Gabe.”

“Why not?”

Anna answered for him. “He can’t because he already has.” She grabbed Sam’s hand. “Happy?”

“Very. We HAVE to double date sometime.”

“Yes. Sure thing, Gabe. We should probably go and finish our assignment now though.”

Sam and Anna stood up and left.

~

Dean had noticed that he didn’t really know a lot about Cas. He didn’t want to pry, but he was curious. His new friend spoke in a strange way and wasn’t completely up to date on current crazes but still managed to remain popular. There must be an acceptable way to phrase it but Dean wasn’t too great with words. Therefore something along the line of “So, what’s the deal with you, Castiel?” came out of his mouth.

“What do you mean, Dean?”

“For one, you speak too formal for a kid our age and, two, you’re popular but until recently hadn’t seen an action film.” Dean continued “I know it’s probably inappropriate to ask as we have only known each other for a few days, but I’d like to be friends with you.”

“Dean, I have no problem with you asking but is there something wrong with my personality?”

“Hell no! I think it’s awesome that you can be different and still as normal as you are at the same time.” Dean paused as he tried to straighten out what he just said.

“I understand”

“You do? I said it and I’ve confused myself!”

“There isn’t a definite reason for why I am like I am. You don’t see Gabe or Anna watching nerdy films or constantly speaking in full sentences and we were brought up in the same house. Well... ” Cas trailed off “... it’s complicated and I shall not bore you with the details.”

“Ah. Spore spot. It was wrong for me to ask.”

“I don’t mind talking about it. I’m fine with handing out the information, but some people don’t take it in the way I’d hope they would. I’ll explain but don’t try to cheer me up or anything. I’m not sad!” Cas hesitated for a second “at least, I’m not sad anymore.” Dean gave a soft nod and gestured for Cas to continue. “When I was 11, my mother passed away.” Dean looked slightly concerned. “It affected me a great deal because she was my role model.” He added a side-note: “She was from England and that’s why my voice is a little strange. I had both my father’s and my peers’ influence on how to talk but spend a lot of my time trying to mimic my mum. I sometimes pick up on certain words and pronounce them differently now through habit.” He got back on track “Anna also loved her a lot but was a huge Daddy’s girl and Gabe was quite similar but she wasn’t actually his mum. My father had an affair when my mother was pregnant with me and Gabe’s actual mother left after he was born. My mother decided to forgive my Dad and help look after his child because it was the proper Christian thing to do. We did everything together until she got sick. I sat at her bedside every day after school. I read to her, I told her about my day, but most importantly, I stayed strong. I wanted to cry so much but I had to show Anna that things were okay.”

“Sorry.” Dean butted it when it hit an awkward silence.

“It’s okay. I’ve learned to live with it. I’ve already gone into too much information so I guess I’ll continue. It was her that showed me all the old films and because she enjoyed them, I enjoyed them. It’s kind of stuck. I love old British films the most. This is why I find no need to watch the modern movies. I’ve already found the movies I like." 

"That really sucks." Dean said dumbfoundedly. "I’m not very good with words. Do you want to keep talking about it?”

“I feel that if I let too many of the memories out, there will be fewer for me. I don’t want to forget her.” He hesitated.

“Oh, it doesn’t matter, we can stop. I’m glad you let me in though. Thanks, Cas.”

“It’s fine Dean. Perhaps, long term, it will help you feel more comfortable around me. The people who know all of this tend to leave me though. I’m just glad you now understand my twiste-“

Dean cut Cas off “-don’t say that about yourself! You are in no way twisted!”

“I’m glad you think that Dean.”

“Seeing as though you’ve not scared me off yet do you feel like telling me anymore about your family?”

“Sure. Well, Balthazar is now 21. He’s off studying media or something. He’s-“

“-who’s Balthazar?”

“My elder brother.”

“You have another brother?”

“Yeah. He took my mother’s death better than I did and he was the one that helped me through it. During that first year after her death, Balth was my main father figure. My Dad didn’t take her passing very well and went off the rails. I haven’t seen him for about a year... Anyway, Balthazar picked up on a lot of my mother’s traits. He has a much stronger British accent and as it was our mother who introduced us to classic films he decided to study it in her legacy.”

“So it’s just you Anna and Gabe here?”

“Yes. Well, no. I have some cousins that live here too. As you can see, I have a big house. It’s nice having everyone around. It was Balthazar’s idea after my mother died and he wanted to go off and study elsewhere. However, my uncle has now moved out so it’s just me, Anna, Gabriel, Ezekiel and Naomi”

“So, are you the father figure now? Or is that Gabe or Ezekiel?”

“It would appear that it is me, yes. It’s strange because they were stronger than me in that first year but since then, I’ve been the one helping them. I enjoy it though. I know it sounds weird but I enjoy the responsibility. It’s not a huge responsibility as Gabe is our age and Ezekiel is actually a year older but I still feel responsible.”

“Oddly enough, I understand you. How come, if Ezekiel is older he hasn’t taken control?”

“He isn’t a great role model. He was strong and well composed a few years ago but now he just feels the need to mess around and get drunk. He believes he has superhuman abilities and stuff.” Cas paused “but honestly, I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know how to be a father figure. How can I? I’m only 17!”

“I know exactly how you feel, dude.” Cas looked into Dean’s lovely green eyes and a puzzled look spread along his face before Dean continued. “My dad died when I was 8. He was a federal agent and was shot during a raid by a drug addict. It wasn’t the shot that killed him though. He was shot whilst he was driving and crashed his car. We went to see him in hospital after the accident, he looked okay and they said he would make a recovery. So, we left him and went home. Later that night we got a phone call saying he’d died peacefully in his sleep. My mother didn’t take it well and, as the alpha male,” He said with a smile. “I gave myself the job of cheering her up and putting things back to how they used to be”

“Sorry.” Cas muttered.

“You have no need to be sorry, dude. You’ve got it worse. My mum is now back on track and we are a proper family again. I am, however, also the father figure to Sammy. I guess we have that in common.”

“True. Do you feel too young to be handling this type of thing sometimes?” Cas asked.

“ _Sometimes?_ ” Dean remarked with a laugh. “I do the entire time, dude.”

“Good to know I’m not alone.”

“And you really do have it worse. You have to know when to have ‘the talk’ with Anna” He sniggered.

A blushfilled Cas' cheeks. "I think I'll leave that to Balthazar."

“ANYWAY.” Dean proceeded. “That’s enough chick flick moments for now. You up for 2 Fast 2 Furious?”

“Didn’t we watch that?” Cas looked puzzled.

“No, that was THE Fast and THE Furious. That was the first one.” Dean said enthusiastically.

“How many are there?”

“Seven at the minute. And Paul Walker gets hotter each time." _‘Oh’ he thought to himself. ‘I just called a guy hot.... in public.’_ He exchanged an awkward smile with Cas and turned to the TV.

 _‘Huh?’_ Cas thought. _‘That seemed a little weird. Dean’s straight, right? The alpha male? He just called a guy hot.’_ It isn’t that Cas hadn’t THOUGHT about Paul Walker. He had definitely clocked the fact he may have been the most handsome man in existence but he didn’t expect to hear that from Dean. He considered asking but turned the idea down as he settled down next to his new friend to watch the film.

It’s safe to say they still had a lot to do on their assignment.

~

Upstairs, once they’d had wondered off, Anna shut her bedroom door, propping a chair up behind it so they wouldn’t be disturbed. She took hold of Sam’s hand and pulled him up off the floor, dragging him easily towards her bed. They laid side by side, just holding hands and daydreaming until Sam rolled over to look into Anna’s perfect, blue eyes. “You’re eyes are just so... wow” He muttered.

“Thank you. Your eyes are quite wow too.” She said rolling over and placing a soft kiss on his lips.

* * *

They actually made progress on the assignment the following weekend. It was Saturday and neither of them had plans. Naturally, Dean made Cas watch the 4th Fast and Furious film. When Cas asked about the third Dean’s response was _“Tokyo Drift is shit.”_ Cas didn’t object.

Dean made yet another comment about Paul Walker’s attractiveness. He pointed out his six-pack, claiming that he had one too. Cas didn’t believe him but humoured him anyway. The doubts he had about Dean's sexual orientation lingered in the air.

~

Dean slid into the shower almost as soon as he got home, tired and in need of cooling down before heading to bed. Odly enough, as his hand found his dick, his thoughts flickered to his new friend. 

* * *

They hung out for a few days during the week (managing to finish the Fast and Furious series). They sometimes ate lunch together but more often than not Cas was sat with the group of ‘popular’ people. Dean thought the social hierarchy was crap but it did give him more time to get to know Benny better. Sometimes Sam sat with them too. However, his relationship with Anna had become public knowledge by Monday morning, thanks to Gabe, so he sat closer to her. AnGiven that shewas a kind-hearted, attractive girl, Anna was in with the crowd of 'popukar' kids, but, truth ge told, it mostly due to the reputations of her family. 

* * *

Saturday rolled by and Dean assumed it would only be Sam and his mother that would remember his birthday. He was wrong. At midnight he got a text from Benny wishing him a happy birthday. This was followed by a few more around 0800 from Becky and Chuck. Further surpeise came around midday when he received another text. _‘Hi Dean. Just wanted to wish you a happy birthday. We should celebrate soon. Come around to mine tomorrow? –Cas’_ . Dean stood smiling before replying  **_‘Thanks Cas. Sure. :) –D’_ ** . Later on his phone beeped again.  _‘Yo! Deano, Hppy Bday, dde! The Casinator wn’t sht up bout ur visit 2moz. He’s really takn 2 u! - Gabe’_  Once Dean had deciphered the message he was curious as to what Gabe meant.

His reply simply read  ** _‘I don’t know wtf youre on bout dude.’_**  

It took an hour to get a response and when he read the text he was disappointed to find it just said  _‘Giv him time’_. He let it slip his mind and went downstairs for birthday pie.

Later that day he decided he actually wanted to go out and _do_  something to celebrate. He texted Benny, Chuck, Becky, Gabe, and Cas. He wanted to go to the movies to see the new Marvel film. Sam was all up for it and had asked Dean if he could invite Anna. Anna had set Gabe up with Jess and they had a date planned but reworked it so they could celebrate with Dean. Benny couldn’t make it. When they arrived at the movies Chuck and Becky, Sam and Anna and Gabe and Jess all sat with their respective partners and left Dean and Cas alone. It could have been described as awkward but Dean chose not to think about it that was and just enjoy Cas’ company. “Thanks for coming, man”

“No problem.”

“Your birthday’s next week, right?”

“Right. Let’s enjoy yours first though.” Cas whispered with a smile.

Gabe leant over and whispered “Quiet down over here you two lovebirds.”

~

Gabe headed for the park when they left. He persuaded them all to hang out for a little longer and managed to get his hands on some beer. Cas had never had more than one beer before. So, when Dean gave him his third, he was quite... ’tipsy’. He kept constant contact with Dean all night for support.

Dean had a great time. He felt content. His new friends surrounded him, it was his birthday and he was finally 18. He hadn’t consciously realised that Cas was leaning on him for support the whole time they were there. Instead his attention was drawn to the amusing stories Gabe was telling of how he’s pranked Sam at school earlier that week. Sam and Jess hit it off. Gabe loved that his protégé and his possible girlfriend got on so well. However, when she starting ignoring Gabe and opting to talk to Sam about his lessons instead, Gabe got irritated. With Anna nearby, Sam was aware that he should probably stop talking to Jess. He couldn’t say anything without it sounding like he was flirting. Honestly, he thought, he was actually aiming to flirt. This isn’t good, Sam. Stop it Sam....

* * *

Although it was killing him, Dean couldn’t help but get a tingly feeling inside when Cas touched him once he’d realised what was happening. By the time he got home he’d pretty much forgotten what had happened at the park because he was drunk... really drunk and really, really happy. He was, however, dreading heading home and facing his mother but as it turned out, it wasn’t too bad. She gave a slightly disappointed look before giggling and warning him that she would allow it as a one off. She gave her sons a hug and some birthday pie and sent him to bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was it okay?


	3. ♫ I Will Stand By You Forever ♫

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was planning on sticking to a routine but I'm not getting any comments or kudos so I figured people aren't enjoying it enough for me to rush. I'll keep uploading (there are 20 more chapters left) but unless I find out people are actually liking it, the chapters will be updated when I feel like it.
> 
> [This isn't me begging for love - I promise I'm not attention seeking]

Dean had spent every evening that week at Cas’. He stayed late hanging out with Cas and Gabriel whilst Sam was with Anna before going home at around 10pm. He liked their new routine. He'd managed to make friends with two of the most popular people in school and he was oddly proud of himself. Theoretically, he had Sam to thank for that. If it wasn’t for Sam being paired up with Anna, Dean wouldn’t have had to drive him over to the Novak residence. If he hadn’t driven there, he wouldn’t have met Cas. So really, he had Sam’s teacher to thank.

* * *

Friday came around and Cas didn’t need to ask twice when he invited Dean over. It was ridiculous how comfortable Dean felt around the two brothers. He really looked forward to English lessons when he could just sit and talk to Cas. He didn’t even care if he was doing work, he just liked listening to Cas and thinking about how fortunate he’d become. 

He thought back to his reluctance over moving from Wichita as he glanced over at his new friends laid on the sofas in the den whilst they were watching Spiderman (Gabe’s choice). He realised how stupid he was just a few weeks earlier. A few weeks ago, he would have said that moving away from somewhere they had been for ages was a bad thing. Because all change is bad change, right? Wrong. He now realised that this change was good change. He hadn’t been in Wichita long but felt that Cas and Gabe were better friends than he’d had before. It gave a warm feeling deep inside.

Gabe stood up, pausing the movie, declaring, “I gotta pee”. This left Dean and Cas sat together in silence. It wasn’t an awkward silence. It was a nice silence. Cas expelled a loud, content sigh as he turned his head to Dean and smiled. Dean smiled back. He was just about to ask something as Gabe came back into the room and jumped over the back of the sofa to sit down. He pressed play.

Carefully and subtly, Dean removed his phone from his pocket and angled it slightly into Cas’ direction before snapping a quick photo. Dean loved taking photos but his phone had a crappy 3.2MP camera. He figured it’s better than nothing though, and there was no chance he’d be able to get his decent 10.2MP camera subtly out at any point. He quickly made the image Cas’ contact picture before slipping his phone back in his pocket and turning back to the movie.

When it finished Gabriel rushed off somewhere. At this point Cas turned to Dean and simply said “Why?”

“Why what?” Dean replied.

“Why did you do that?”

“Still not with ya here dude... Do what?” He raised an eyebrow.

“I’m not blind and you’re not subtle.” He paused, waiting for Dean to catch up. There was still just a puzzled reaction pasted on his face. Cas could feel a slight amount of anger building up inside him as he let out “Why did you take a picture of me?”

“Ohhhhh. That. Sorry.” He then had second thoughts. “Well actually, I’m not.”

“You’re not?”

“No, I’m not. I wanted a contact picture for you in my phone so I took one.”

Cas sighed. “You could have just asked, Dean.”

“Sorry... So, can I take one?”

“Come here” Cas said and took Dean’s phone off of him. He got close to Dean, close enough to make his skin tingle at the touch, and took as selfie of the two of them before giving the phone back and laughing. Dean inspected the photo to discover a lovely shot of his closed eyes and Cas’ timid smile. “There you go.”

“That’s not very flattering.”

“I like it.” Cas insisted.

“Well, I don’t and it’s my phone. Let’s take another one.”

“Fine.” Cas said with a smile just as Gabe walked in.

“What the hell are you guys doing?”

“Taking a photo” Cas said innocently and Dean blushed.

“May I ask _why_?” Gabriel added.

“For my contact picture in Dean’s phone.”

“Ha, GAY!”

“Thanks for that, Gabe.” Dean added.

“So you’ll be wanting one of me too then?” Gabriel questioned.

“Oh. Yeah. Sure.” He said reluctantly.

“Good!” he said snatching Dean’s phone and taking a hideous selfie. “There you go DeanO!”

“...thanks?”

“Welcome. Now, you up for a sandwich?”

“Hells yeah!”

“HEY!” He said angrily. “That’s my line!”

“What?” Dean questioned.

“Hells yeah is _my_ thing. You can say hell yeah all you want but the moment you add that ‘s’ you’re treading into my territory. Got that?”

“Um. Yeah?” Dean shrugged.

They walked towards the kitchen. Dean was a huge food fan. Especially pie and burgers - something that gained him a lot a respect from Gabriel. The latter of the aforementioned boys offered Dean a beer although he knew he needed to drive home and he offer was initially declinced. When Cas said he could stay in their spare room, Dean changed his mind and graciously accepted the alcohol. He sent Sam a quick text _'Hey, Sammy. Crashing @ Cas’ tonight.'_   The response was almost immediate _'Okie Dokie. Wish him happy birthday from me! :D'._

 _Crap!_ He had less than an hour until Cas’ birthday and he’d forgotten all about it. He wasn’t obliged to get a gift so he simply said “Cas, you having a beer? Gotta get your birthday off to a good start!”

“No thanks Dean. I didn’t feel good after last time and I do not want to feel like that again, especially on my birthday.”

“Aw come on! Live a little, dude!” Dean begged.

Gabriel butted in. “You’re not going to succeed. I’ve tried to loosen him up so many times and he’s always been too stubborn.” He then added “and if I can’t do it you stand no chance!”

“Aw, come one Cas! It’s your birthday!” Dean insisted.

“No. I’ll stick to lemonade thanks.”

“No! No, you won’t. You will have a beer and you will smile and watch The Wolverine with us right now.”

“Fine.” Cas released a quiet and slow reply.

“Good. Thank you.” He said before turning to Gabriel and mouthing ‘ _in your face_!’

The three guys sat down in front of the giant TV that was in the ‘den’ of the Novak household to watch Hugh Jackman at his finest. “He’s a _fine_ specimen, isn’t he?” Dean announced as it began. Triggering a few odd looks. Gabriel seemed to pick up on it right there and then... Dean was gay!

Cas dosed off as it neared the end of the film and as the credits rolled Dean turned to find Cas asleep leaning on his shoulder and smiled softly. He slowly moved, replacing his shoulder with a cushion and sitting on a different sofa.

“So...” Gabe began.

“So what?”

“How long have you known?”

“Known what?”

“That you’re... you know...” Gabriel waved his hands around awkwardly.

“I really have no clue what you’re on about...”

“Ya know... ’that way’... ’batting for the other side’...?”

“I’m not gay!” He said far too loud. Cas should have woken up at that so he turned around to find him, oddly, still fast asleep.

“Oh, my friend, you are!” Gabe said patronisingly.

“No. No, I’m not. I think I would know if I was gay.” Dean said adamantly.

“Maybe you should talk to Cassie? He’d know what to do. Him being gay, n’all.” Gabe paused. Shock spread across his face. “Crap. You didn’t hear that from me. He’s only told me, Anna and Balthazar. Naomi and Zeke don’t even know.”

“Oh. It’s fine. He told me the other day. But that's not the point. The point is: I’m not gay!”

“Wait... he told you? Why would he tell you?”

“I don’t know. It slipped out.”

“Wow. He must feel really comfortable around you.”

“I guess. Is there something wrong with that?”

“No. He’s just never really gotten close to anyone before. This might be when things change for my awkward little brother. Just don’t hurt him. In more ways than one. Now I know you and him are of the same orientation I will stress the fact he is easily lead on. Don’t let him fall for you if you don’t plan on reciprocating the feelings.”

“Even if I was gay - which I'm not - I wouldn't hurt him.”

“Oh really. Did you, or did you not recently make a comment about Hugh Jackman being hot?”

“I did. Am I not allowed to think that an attractive guy is attractive without being gay?”

“Sure you are. However, Cassie has told me you made a similar comment about Paul Walker.”

Dean smiled for a second before realising what he was doing. “What... no! Well, yes...”

“Make up your mind, Dean. Did you or did you not?”

“I did but that means nothing!”

“Ok. So tell me this: What is the longest relationship you’ve been in?”

“Erm”

“Wait... are you.... are you a virgin?” Gabe asked both awkwardly and mockingly.

“Hell no!” Dean responded with force. “I just wouldn’t call any of my hook-ups relationships. I think there is only one chick I’ve been with more than once. The rest were just one night stands.”

“So, you’re a man slut? Or are you killing time whilst you’re waiting to find ‘the one’?” Gabe added.

“I'm only a teenager. It doesn't matter.” Dean trailed off.

“Sounds gay to me.”

“I’m gay because I’m waiting for the right woman? That makes perfect sense doesn’t it?”

“You have true feelings deep down that could not be satisfied by these women you have had one night stands with.”

“Can we drop this topic now?” Dean asked patiently.

“Sure.” Gabriel conceded. “But please just tell me when you realised....”

Dean hesitated for a few seconds before exhaling loudly and saying “Right now... I guess....”

“Oh.... My God!” Gabe gave a fake gasp. “Really? I would never have guessed!” He continued to mock.

“Can you just shut up?” He sounded pissed off as well as slightly drunk. “Can you please just tell me where I can sleep tonight?”

Gabriel led Dean up the stairs from the den, through the kitchen, up another flight of stairs and across a long corridor. There must have been 6 rooms spaced out in this area. It was a fudging huge house. Gabriel signaled for him to go into the spare room and shut the door behind him. Dean just flopped onto the bed and buried his face in the pillow before taking his phone out his pocket and sending Cas a quick text saying  _‘happy birthday’_.

* * *

 The following morning (well, really it was the same day) he dragged himself out of bed at 0800 because you can’t sleep late at someone else’s house. He hadn’t really had much sleep. His mind was going around and around and around the conversation with Gabe. _‘Am I gay? I can’t be gay... I’m not gay!’_ His mind just wouldn’t rest. So, when he walked downstairs he couldn’t help but yawn. At which point he bumped into Cas with his eyes shut and ended up in an embrace. It was quite awkward (and quite was an understatement).

“I’m- I’m sorry. Sorry. So-“

Cas butted in “- it’s fine, Dean. Good morning.”

“Morning. Happy Birthday, dude.”

Gabe approached as they pulled away from each other. “You think I didn’t see that?”

“See what?” Cas asked.

“You’re little gay guy hug there.”

“ _Gabe!_ ” Dean warned in a deep voice.

“For one, Gabriel, it wasn’t a hug. Dean fell over. For two, would it be a big deal if we’d actually hugged. Finally, three, I might me but Dean’s not gay.”

“Debatable.” Was Gabe’s response before simply walking off.

“What does he mean?” Cas turned to Dean.

“Nothing. He’s just being stupid. So, what do you normally do for your birthday?” Dean interjected.

“Nothing special.”

“Oh, come on! What do you _want_ to do?”

“Nothing really. I’m happy doing nothing. I’m not really like you. I don’t like getting drunk.”

“You don’t have to get drunk to have fun. You could still have a party.”

“I don’t think so.”

“You’re one of the most popular guys in school. You have all your little minions. You should have a party!”

“No thank you.”

“Fine...” Dean sighed.

“Breakfast?” Gabe yelled.

“Hell-S yeah!” Dean responded, emphasis on the s.

“I’ve warned you, Winchester!”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.”

\---

Around lunchtime Balthazar arrived.

“Hey li’l bro! Happy birthday!”

“Hello, Balthazar. How are you?”

“I’m good thanks, Cassie. You?”

“Not bad.”

Balthazar spotted Dean talking to Gabe. Dean was wearing a tight MARVEL t-shirt. He wolf whistled quietly. “Wow! What do we have here?” He exclaimed in that sort of voice that insinuates slight mockery but mixed in with genuine admiration.

“That’s Dean.” Cas whispered.

“Heeey! Cas, Balth, Gabe, Anna, Naomi, Grasshopper. How are you guys?” Ezekiel appeared from upstairs.

“Someone’s in a good mood.” Balthazar poked.

“Can’t complain. Today’s going to be a good day.”

“Oh yeah? Why?”

“Cassie’s birthday. We’re gunna have a big party and get smashed!”

“Wait! Can we go back a bit?” Dean asked. “Grasshopper?”

“There’s just something about you.”

“Well... okay then.”

“Anywhoo. Where and when are we having this thing?” Ezekiel pushed.

“We’re not.” Cas insisted.

“Aw why not Cassie?” Balthazar asked. “Zeke’s really looking forward to it.” He turned to Ezekiel.

“I just don’t want one.”

“Come on Cas!”

“No!”

Dean approached. “You never know. You might enjoy it. Other people with definitely enjoy it. Why don’t you do it for them as well as doing it for you?”

“Sounds plausible...” He took a moment. “Why not? Let’s do it.”

“Boom!” Dean exclaimed once again turning to Gabe with an  _‘in your face’_ sort of look again.

Balthazar turned to Gabe and simply mouthed ‘Who is he and how did he do that?’

Gabe moved closer and whispered, “I’ll tell you later.”

\---

“So?” Balthazar exclaimed, walking towards Gabe.

“So?” Gabe replied.

“Care to share?”

“Share what?”

“Dish the dirt! Who is Dean?”

“He’s Cassie’s new friend. Well, actually he’s my friend too. However, the... bond... between them is more profound."

“ooooohooooohoooooh” Balthazar exclaimed in a childish, schoolgirl, mocking way.

“Well, I _think_ Cas likes Dean. I don’t know if Dean likes Cas. Up until last night, apparently, he didn’t know he was gay.” Gabe explained.

“So he is gay?”

“I think so. He started to admit it before he asked where he could sleep and ran off. He’s been making remarks about hot actors recently.”

“Do you think that he’d go for a guy like our Cassie?”

“You never know. I’ve seen a few looks that make me think so, but due to the fact he didn’t know he was gay... I’m unsure. You’ll have to do some detective work while you’re here.”

“That I will.” Balthazar said with a smile.

The rest of the family came to see Cas and they all ate lunch together. Cas insisted Dean stayed to eat. Dean didn’t have to be asked twice. He plonked himself down between Cas and Gabe and smiled at the lovely buffet laid out in front of him.

“So, Dean. Care to introduce yourself to me?” Balthazar said, breaking the ice.

“What do you want to know?” Dean replied.

“Everything.”

“Everything?”

“Yes. Let’s start with... How old are you?”

“Turned 18 a week ago.”

“Ohhhh. Similar age to our Cassie then.”

“Yeah.”

“Okay. How about... when did you move here?”

“Over the summer. I moved here with my little brother, Sammy, and my mom.”

“How did you meet my younger brother?”

“I guess I have Sammy’s teacher to thank for that. I brought him round to work on a project with Anna and Cas invited me it.” Dean explained.

“You two been hanging out a lot then?”

“Yeah. I don’t really have any friends here yet so it’s nice to have some people to hang out with.”

“So... are you two planning on doing anything special for Cassie’s birthday?”

“I persuaded him to have a party. Is that not enough?” Dean questioned.

“I mean just the two of you.”

“No. Why?”

“Because, Cassie, you and your  _‘friend’_  here appear to be quite close. I was just wondering if there was something else there.” Balthazar answered.

“Wow. You’re straight to the point, aren’t you?” Dean asked rhetorically. “No. There’s nothing there. We’ve only know each other for a few weeks.”

“You never know Deany-boy.”

“I do. There’s nothing there.” He said almost viciously without looking at Cas.

Balthazar, however, was looking at Cas staring down at the table awkwardly. He had learned to be able to read his little brother. He could tell how offended he was by Dean’s remark. Therefore, he decided to say “Bit harsh, don’t you think?” whilst staring at Dean and moving his eyes repetitively towards Cas until Dean twigged on.

“Oh. No offense, dude. Just don’t swing that way, ya know?” He tried to reassure himself.

“Oh, it’s fine, Dean. I know.” He replied with a smile but dying inside.

* * *

Balthazar, Dean found out, was great at organising parties. Within an hour of starting he had planned a party and invited everyone (Well, everyone cool enough to be associated with the Novaks). “Guys! Party! Tonight! Lake house!” He announced to his family (and Dean) at around 6pm. “You have one hour to clean up and get ready!”

“Guess I’ll head home then.” Dean said quietly to Cas.

“Why?”

“I need to take a shower and get changed.”

“Okay. See you later.”

“Could I come back here before the party? I’ll need guiding to the Lake House.”

“Sure. Be back before 6:45?”

“Yep. See you in a bit!” Dean bid farewell.

“Hey, Winchester, wait up!” Balthazar called.

“Yes?” Dean said. He already didn’t like that guy.

“Invite little Sammy tonight?”

“You sure he’s cool enough to be seen with the Novaks?” Dean stabbed.

“Oh ha ha. Any friend of a Novak is invited! He’s friends with Anna, right?”

“More than friends.” Dean pointed out with a laugh. “Wait, she didn’t tell you?”

“No, she didn’t. Right, that’s it. He has to come tonight.”

“I’m sure he won’t argue with that. See you later.” Dean left with a smile on his face. ‘Any friend of a Novak is invited’ he replayed. He, Dean Winchester, was friends with the most popular people in the school. That made him smile.

Dean made it back to the Novak household around 1835 with Sam in tow. Sam scrubbed up pretty good. Wearing a smart shirt and some new jeans. Dean, however, hadn’t dressed up smart. He just had a shower and changed his top.

He knocked on the door and it was only a matter of moments until Balthazar swung the door open and brought Sam into a warm embrace. “SAMMY!”

“Um, Hi? Who are you?” Sam responded.

“You kidding me?” He looked shocked. “You’re screwing my little sister and you don’t know who I am?”

“Okay... For one, I’m not screwing Anna and for two, I still don’t know who you are.”

“Good!” He reached out his hand. “The name’s Balthazar. Pleased to meet you.”

Sam took it. “Hi.”

“So, come on in you two. Dean... could you not have made yourself look hot? For Cas?”

“Um. I’m not sure what you mean....” He knew exactly what he meant.

“Ohhh, ya know... you two...” He looked at Dean’s puzzled face. “Doesn’t matter. Come in.”

As Dean entered he saw Cas and yelled “Hey dude!”

“Hello, Dean.” Cas replied.

“Excited?”

“Not really but as you said, I’m doing this for others, not myself.”

“What? No! I’m not saying you should do it for others. Of course you should do it for yourself. There’s no point having the party if you’re not going to have fun.”

“I’ll try, Dean.”

“You better!” Dean stuck his tongue out playfully before walking over the Gabe.

Balthazar approached Cas. “He really cares about you. It’s sweet.”

“Would you just drop it?”

“No, Cassie. He makes you happy. You deserve to know you make him happy too.”

“He doesn’t... I don’t...” He just groaned and began walking off before Balthazar grabbed his wrist.

“Nope. You’re not going to go off and sulk. You’re going to come through and talk to your family and new friends. You’re going to smile as Sammy flirts with Anna. You’re going to laugh and Gabe’s bad jokes. Then you’re going to get into Dean’s beautiful Impala and show him the way to the Lake house where we’re all going to have a good time. Capiche?”

“Capiche.”

\---

“Hey! When did you arrive?” Balthazar called, walking away from talking to Cas and Dean towards Lisa in the dimmed, crowded room.

“She is MIGHTY fine!” Came from Dean’s mouth before he realised what he was doing. “Sorry.” He said much more timidly.

“Um, yeah... Would you like another drink?” That was a rhetorical question. Cas would fetch him another one regardless of Dean’s answer.

“Sure.” He smiled walking alongside Cas to the drinks table. “Quite a few people here tonight.” He said opening another beer. “How many people normally come to your parties?”

“Quite a lot. I don’t know really. I rarely go.”

“What? Why?”

“I just find being alone is nicer than being forced to talk to others.”

“Oh... I’m not sure... does that mean you only fake that you like me?”

“Most definitely not, Dean.” He answered in an almost offensive tone. “You are among the small amount of people I enjoy spending time with.”

“Well... thanks.” Dean said with a smile.

“That is, when you’re not checking out girls instead of concentrating on the conversation we’re having.” Cas stated as he noticed Dean gaze travel from him to Lisa.

“Sorry, dude. I’m just... doesn’t matter. Sorry.”

“It’s fine” Cas sighed.

“No. No, it’s not! I’m just... at the minute... ergh... does-“

“doesn’t matter? Yeah I know.” Cas said with a pissed off tone and a frown.

“Right. Can I... Can I confide... in you?”

“Of course, Dean.”

“Outside?” He gestured.

“Sure. Are you okay?”

They stepped outside and headed down the garden before Dean answered the question.

“I’m just... It’s just that...” He took a deep breath. “I’m having a bit of an... identity crisis at the minute.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Well, initially, I thought I wanted to drink about it, but now I think talking is probably better.” He finished his beer and put it down. “And, I guess you’re the best person to give advice...”

“About what?” Cas began panicking. “Is it something serious?”

“No, no... no. It’s just...”

“Dean, I’ve heard that unfinished sentence multiple times. Just tell me what’s wrong!” He said impatiently.

“Hello, boys.” A strong British accent came from behind them.

Without turning around Cas simply said “Not right now Crowley. Could you leave us for a bit, please?”

“Fine. Fine. I shan’t disturb the happy couple.” He plodded off.

Cas groaned. “Okay, Dean. Talk to me.”

“OK. Right. I think... I think I may be...” Deep breath. “...gay...” He turned a lovely shade of cerise.

“Wow.”

“Don’t judge, please.”

“Why on earth would I judge you? You know who you’re talking to, right?”

“I just figured with the whole alpha male image you may think it’s a little weird me coming out like this, well, I don’t even know if I’m coming out or not. I don’t actually know if I’m gay!” Another sigh.

“There isn’t really a way for me to help you find that out. I awkwardly found out for myself after an... awkward encounter with... that doesn’t matter right now.”

Dean slumped onto a bench grumpily. “Ergh!”

Cas carefully sat down next to him, not too close. “It’s not going to be something you find out right away. Slowly, you’ll start to understand.”

Dean moved closer to his confidant, placing his forehead on his shoulder. “Thanks. Just for listening.”

“Of course, Dean. Anything you need.”

“You’re a great friend, Cas.”

“I don’t know about that. I didn’t exactly help.

“You’re someone I can talk to. The only person in this town, besides my mom and Sammy, that I feel comfortable talking about this shit with. To be honest, I’m not sure I could actually talk to mum or Sammy about this. Just... thanks.”

“Well, you’re welcome. You could always just identify yourself as bisexual?”

“I’m not sure about that. You _know_ you’re gay but still tell people you’re straight. I may or may not be, I think I’ll stick to straight for now.”

“You know, I think this is just the kick I need...”

“What d’ya mean?”

“I think this is a sign. I need to come out of the closet.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. It’ll show strength, right?”

“Right.”

With that, Dean stood up, pulling Cas up with him, and pulled him into a tight hug. “Thanks, Cas.”

They headed towards the house together before they split up to go and talk to other people. Dean whispered a quick good luck.  _‘Go for it’_  into Cas’ ear before drifting off to find Gabe.

“Hey, Cas.” He heard a seductive voice whilst making his way through all the drunk, dancing people, grinding against each other.

“Hi, Bela. How are you?”

“I’m fine. You?”

“I’m okay. Are you enjoying the party?”

“I am. Your family throws the best parties!”

“Well, you have Balthazar to thank for that.”

“Hmmm... Well, I could think of a different member of you family to thank...” It suddenly hit him, oh. “And I can think of a fun way to do it.” Bela moved closer, pulling her arms in to squash her boobs in order to emphasise them. “If you get me...”

He did. “Oh well, um.” He blurted out whilst slowly backing away. “I’m sure that would be nice, but...” Quick mental pep-talk. This was it. This is the moment... He was about to make up an excuse before thinking back to what Dean had said ‘go for it’ “Okay, so, Bela. I’m sure that would be great. However, I’m... gay.”

“Oh. Wow. Sorry.” She gave him a quick hug before adding, “I can keep a secret, don’t worry.”

What a relief. He had to track down Dean. He also had to get a drink. A strong one.

\---

“Dean!” He may be a little tipsy but he must see Dean ASAP.

“Cas? S’up?”

“I did it!”

“Did what? Are you drunk?”

“I wasn’t then. Perhaps I am now.”

“Then being...”

“When I did it.”

“I’m still going to need more detail here. Did what?”

“Came out!”

“You what?”

“I did it. Thanks to you. I feel great.”

“Wow. Well, you’re welcome!”

Castiel just grinned as Dean pulled him in for a congratulatory hug.

“So, the next stage: let’s get you a boyfriend!”

“Um. One step at a time, please.” He said awkwardly. He was talking to the person who he had a crush on. He didn’t want said person to think he was ‘into’ someone else.

“Sure. Just, well done. You’ve inspired me.”

Cas’ heart started beating faster. This was it. Now, he’d come out, Dean was about to come out and they could be a couple and Cas would be very happy and they could go on dates and they could cuddle up and watch films and they could kiss and they could lay in bed together and talk. He got a bit ahead of himself. He didn’t know if Dean was actually going to come out.

“I need to go and pick up a girl, tonight!”

That’s not what he wanted to hear. His heart stopped. That’ll teach him for jumping to assumptions. “Erm, sure. Good.”

“As a finale to that chapter in my life.”

“I’m not sure I understand you.”

“You know. One more girl before I go... you know.”

Cas thought he knew but he didn’t want to jump to that assumption again. “I don’t think I do.”

“Just one final check before I declare I’m into dick.” He said bluntly.

“Oh. Well, I’m feeling powered up tonight. Want some help picking a chick?” Cas was definitely drunk.

Dean chuckled. “How much have you drunk tonight, Cas?”

“Not too much. I just had to celebrate.”

“I can’t believe I’m about to say this but, you don’t have to drink to celebrate.”

“I know. However, today has been a good day. Not only is it my birthday but I also became open about my sexuality. It deserved a drink.” He said with a smile.

“Fair enough. So, who would be right for me tonight?” He gestured around the crowd.

“Hmm. Bela was up for screwing me. She’d definitely screw you.”

“That’s a complement, right?”

“Definitely.”

“She the best then?”

“I think so.”

“So, work your magic and get me a girl!” He ordered before receiving a disapproving look from the smaller, but more intimidating, boy. “Please?” He added.

\---

“So, how’d it go?” Cas asked as Dean approached a while later.

“I couldn’t go through with it.”

“Why? Did I pick the wrong girl?”

“No. I’ve just realised that I don’t need ‘just another girl’ to help me work this out.”

“You don’t?”

“Nope. I already know.”

“You do?”

“Yup.” This was the moment of truth. Cas held his breath. “I’m gay.” Dean said casually, throwing a handful of peanuts into his mouth.

Cas started breathing again. “Well, what do you want to do now then?”

“Drink. Drinking would help. Join me?”

“Sure.”

After a while, both men were ‘hammered’. When Dean went off to the bathroom Balthazar slipped away from the conversation he was having and slithered over to Cas, who sat alone. “How’s it going Cassie?”

“Great!”

“How much alcohol has Dean fed you?” He said with a concerned but slightly amused look on his face.

“A lot. I don’t mind.”

“Fair enough. Made any progress with him?”

“Meaning?”

“You know what I mean. You made a move on him yet?”

“Nope. I’m being strong.” He said with a goofy grin. “I came out earlier though. Told Bela.”

“Wow Cassie. Well done. At least Dean knows you’re gay now, right?”

“Oh, he already knew. Hence he came to me for advice earlier.”

“Advice? What kind of advice?”

“He kinda came out to me.”

“Great. You both swing ‘that way’ time to get together!”

“It’s not that simple, Balth.”

“It is if you make it.”

“Perhaps not today.”

“Okie dokie. It will eventually though. You can bet on it. I’ll make it happen.”

When he saw Dean approach, he waddled off. Passing him briefly a muttering “Break his heart and I‘ll break your neck.”

“What was that about?”

“He’s just worried about my drunkenness.”

“Okie dokie. Perhaps it’s time you went and started sleeping it off. We don’t want you getting too hung over, do we? Providing you’re inexperienced with the whole getting drunk thing.”

“Good idea. You going to do the same? You’ve had more to drink than me.”

“Nah, I have a strong liver.”

“If you’re sure.” He said with a condescending tone.

“Fine. You win. I’ll sleep. Where? I don’t wish to sleep in a spare room. ‘cos I don’t really feel like getting squashed by people sneaking off to have sex upstairs.”

“It’s fine. I have a double bed here.” He stated before adding, “As long as you don’t mind sharing?” awkwardly.

“I’d be fine with that.” Dean gave him a soft smile.

“This way.” He said, grabbing his sleeve and pulling him up the stairs.

They crawled onto Cas’ bed and were almost instantly asleep. It didn’t feel awkward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that was okay.  
> You can find me [here on tumblr.](http://kinda-magnetic.tumblr.com)


	4. ♫ You Can Take My Breath Away ♫

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been so long. I hope nobody minds.

“Holy crap!” Was what Castiel awoke to.

“Oops.” Cas said timidly, pulling away from Dean and untangling their limbs.

“Oops? Oops is all you can say?” He said jumping off the bed. “Nothing happened, right? Nothing happened? We went to bed but rolled over in the middle of the night and accidentally tangled together, right?”

“Almost certainly.” Cas reassured.

“Almost? ALMOST? That’s not very reassuring Cas!”

“Certainly. That is certainly what happened.”

“Okay. We never speak of this again, hear me?”

“Of course.” Cas responded. He slowly laid back down, gripping his head. Hangover.

“You okay?”

“Not really. How are you not hungover?”

“I drink a lot. I’m kinda immune. Want some pain killers?”

“Please. Bathroom cupboard.” He effortlessly gestured in the direction of his en suite.

They proceeded to move around each other as if the previous night hadn’t happened. It was hard for Dean to hide it from Gabriel and Balthazar when he exited Cas’ bedroom.

“You deflower my little brother last night?” Gabriel laughed curiously.

“Fuck off”

“You were deep in conversation when I interrupted and then you leave his room this morning with messy hair.”  _Yey, Crowley’s here._ Dean thought. 

“My hair generally gets messy when I sleep. I crashed in Cas’ room because I was tired.” He snapped.

“Fine. Fine. Whatever you say Deany-boy.”

Sam and Anna just sat there laughing at the conversation.

“And where did you go last night, Sammy?” Dean changed the subject. He loved intimidating his little brother.

“Nowhere important. We just hung out.”

“So, that isn’t a hickey on your neck?”

Sam quickly rushed his hand up to cover it. “Erm, no. It’s not.”

“Well, there isn’t actually anything there, Kiddo.” Balthazar chimed in. “Dean’s gotcha. So, where did you two _actually_ go last night?” This warranted Dean ‘Sammy’s bitch face’.

The three older boys teased the young couple for a while whilst they ate their greasy breakfast. A great cure for a hangover.

* * *

1pm rolled around and Cas still wasn’t out of bed. Dean had had some bad hangovers but he’d never been almost comatose for this long. His family seemed to brush it off and not worry and Dean was probably more concerned that all of his relatives combined. So, at around 1:10 he slipped off upstairs to find him. He was just lying there, perfectly still. Dean slowly crept towards him a sat down on the bed before reaching out and lightly shaking his shoulder.

“Hey, Cas. Wake up.” He whispered.

“No thanks.”

“Come on, you need some food and plenty of water.”

“No thanks.” He repeated louder.

“I’m not taking no for an answer. You’ll just get worse.”

“Fine.” He all but growled. 

Dean pulled him out of bed before fetching more painkillers and filling his glass with more water. “Drink up.”

“Thanks.”

“Now, come and get some greasy food down you.”

“Ergh. No thanks.”

“What did I say?”

“Fine.” He left the room following Dean. 

“Hey! Look who finally graced us with his presence.” Gabe yelled as he saw Cas emerge from upstairs.

“Please... talk more quietly.”

“Cas. Food. Now.” Dean demanded.

“Fine.” He mumbled that repeated word again, heading for the kitchen.

“How do you make him do that?” Balthazar queried once his younger brother was out of ear shot.

“Do what?” Dean responded.

“Whatever you want him to do. You’re like a god.”

“I have a way of making him see the sensible thing to do. It’s not like I force him.”

“You have a power, man. You should use it to your advantage.”

“I don’t plan on trying to manipulate people, if that’s what you mean. I’ll leave that to Crowley and Gabe”.

That warranted a piece of bread being thrown his way, hitting him directly on the forehead. 

* * *

The following day Dean texted Cas.  _‘Hey dude, feeling any better?’_  It took multiple hours to get a response.

**_‘No. Not really. Sorry, I shouldn’t be texting you whilst you’re in class. Text me when you’ve got lunch.’_ **

_‘Don’t worry. It’s only English. It’s not the same without you, man.’_

**_‘As glad as I am that you miss me, I do not wish to distract you.’_ **

_‘It’s fine. People are just working on their assignments anyway. It’s not like I can do anything without you here to help.’_

**_‘I sincerely apologize. I know it must be inconvenient.’_ **

_‘IT’S FINE! I’m sure we can make up the time later. Just focus on getting better, OK?’_

**_‘Sure.’_ **

_‘Is Balth taking good care of you?’_

**_‘Balthazar left early this morning, he has some sort of lecture this afternoon.’_ **

‘ _Sucks, dude. You’re looking after yourself well, though? Plenty to eat and drink?’_

‘ ** _Sure.’_**

_‘You’re lying.  I insist you go downstairs RIGHT NOW and get yourself fed!’_

**_‘I’ll do it in a bit!’_ **

_‘Nope. You’ll do it now!’_

**_‘Fine!’_ **

_‘Thank you. :) ‘_

~

 

“Hey, Cas.”

“Dean? Why aren’t you at school?” Cas turned around at the sound of his best friend’s voice.

“Figured I’d skip. Nothing important this afternoon anyway. Better use of my time being here to look after you.”

“No. No it’s not. I insist you go back!”

“NOTHING will make me leave you right now. This isn’t just a hangover.”

“I’ll be fine soon.”

“Maybe you will. I’m staying anyway. I care, Cas.”

“I promise you don’t have to.”

“Doesn’t change the fact I’m going to go down to the den and bring up Iron Man and we’re going to sit and watch it here and now.”

“Okay.”

A few hours later and Cas still wasn’t improving. He managed to pull himself out of bed to go to the toilet though. However, after quite a while without him returning, Dean approached the door and knocked gently. "Cas, you okay, dude?” No response. “CAS?” He let himself in to find an unconscious Cas and the bathroom floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun dun duuuuuun.  
> Leave me a comment and let me know you're out there, yeah?


	5. ♫ Would You Swear? ♫

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been like a month (maybe longer). Sorry. I forgot I was writing this.

Echoing. Quiet voices echoing. _‘What the Hell? Where am I?’_ Castiel awoke to an almost purely white room.  _‘Is this Heaven?’_

“Hey, hey Cassie!” Balthazar’s voice comforted him.

“Ba.. Baltha...” It was too much effort to continue. He just rested his head back down to the pillow lazily and passed out again.

Half an hour later, he came around for the second time. This time a little more invigorated. Anna was there to greet him with a small, sad smile and glass of water. “You okay Cas?”

“Yeah. I think so. What happened?” He croaked quietly.

“They aren’t sure yet. Dean found you passed out on the bathroom floor. You were lucky he was there to find you.” She reassuringly squeezed his hand. 

“Dean? Is he here?” Castiel spoke with more fervor, a soft smile building on his face.

“You kidding me? We couldn’t make him leave! He’s waiting outside with Balth and Gabe.”

The boy's smile grew. Dean really did care about him.  _Maybe Balthazar was right._

This was followed by a smile from Anna as the realisation hit her. “It’s actually _him_  you want to see. Not me, right?”

“What do you mean?” He voice began getting croaky again.

“That smile. You have a thing for him. Aw, Cassie! I’ll fetch him.”

“What? Wait, no!” He shouted after her but she’d gone.

“Hey, Anna said you wanted me?” Dean poked his head around the corner.

“I just wanted to thank you. Thank you. Really, Dean, I can’t thank you enough.”

“You don’t have to thank me.” The taller boy said sincerely.

“Of course I do. You may have saved my life.”

“I just happened to be there. I didn’t know you were going to pass out.”

“You didn’t just _happen_ to be there. You chose to come and look after me. I will be eternally grateful. You’re like my... I know this will sound cliché, guardian angel.” A soft blush tinted his cheeks. 

“You’re welcome. I only did what any good friend should do." They were silent for a moment. "You know, I broke into your Lake house. I’m not sure you should be grateful about breaking the law.” He said with a smile.

“Well, break in anytime. From now on do whatever the hell you want in my house.” Cas stroked Dean’s bicep subtly.

Dean laughed - no, he fucking giggled. “Okie Dokie. As long as you promise you’ll get better.”

“I’ll try. What’s wrong with me?”

“I don’t know. They won’t tell us anything. I don’t think it’s anything too serious.”

Cas spoke in an irritated tone. “Well obviously there’s something serious wrong with me. I’m in hospital!”

Dean tried to calm him by saying “I honestly can’t say. I’m just staying optimistic. You need to too. Focus on getting better, okay?” in a hushed voice.

“Okay. Thank you.”

“I’ll tell you as soon as I find anything out. I promise.” Dean grabbed hold of Cas’ hand and held it still for a second before raising their clenched fists up to his own forehead and whispering “Promise me you’ll get better. I need you well enough to keep me on track. School’s not the same without you.”

“I promise, Dean.”

“I’ll fetch Balth. See you soon.”

* * *

“Heeey, Cassie. You okay now?” Balthazar said patronisingly. 

“Getting better, I think.”

“Good. Dean’s a real superhero, isn’t he?”

“He really is.” Cas replied with a smile.

“and the hand holding between you two... pretty intense moment.” He teased.

“Oh, shut up. You shouldn’t have been being nosey, Balth! Just because we know he’s gay now, doesn’t mean he’s _into_  me”

“You’re too blind to see what’s right in front of you, Cassie! He’s been really worried about you; he dialed 911; he skipped school in order to look after you; he feels guilty for getting you drunk. He cares, Cas. He cares a lot.”

“You think?” There was a hint of optimism buried deep in his voice.

“I know.” The older brother said confidently.

They exchanged a pretty intense look before a nurse interrupted. “Castiel Novak?”

* * *

 He’d been informed that there was some suspicious action in his brain and they needed to do some proper tests. This involved an EEG. The nurse had explained that they would attach a lot of electrodes to his head and play some different frequency noises. Castiel remained unrealistically calm throughout. Successfully persuading himself that he’d be okay. This was mainly due to the fact he had Dean’s enthusiastic approach behind him.

The results would take a week to process and he had been advised to stay off school until they got back to him. He argued back and refused but Dean talked some sense into him.

~

Every day that week Dean went to Cas’ after school and they had made a lot of progress on MARVEL films.The sick boy had made his friend promise he wouldn’t skip any classes and Dean honoured his promise, visiting as soon as school finished each day.

“Jeremy Renner... YES!” Dean said enthusiastically when Hawkeye entered the scene.  

“You really don’t hold back, do you?” Castiel quirked an eyebrow at the comment. 

“What?”

“You don’t hold back. When you think something you feel the need to verbalise it.”

“Yeah... maybe. Something wrong with that?” Confidence and embarrassment fought deep inside him, his voice faltering slightly.  

“No. I just find it amusing." Cas gazed at Dean as he stared intensely at the TV. “What are you thinking now?”

“I’m thinking that Chris Hemsworth is _mighty_  fine and you need to shut your mouth” Dean paused and suddenly launched himself at Cas covering his mouth his hand “or I’ll shut it for you!” He continued.

“Fine. Fine. I’ll be quiet.” Cas responded smugly as Dean moved his hand away.

Dean began to think about how soft Cas’ lips felt and how warm his breath was against his hand.  _Damn. I **cannot**  be thinking this about my best friend. Damn it, Dean! Damn it!_ Dean was using all his willpower to keep his mind from daydreaming about his friend and turned his attention back to the movie. Cas, too, was thinking about that moment. Although, unlike Dean, he wasn’t trying to tell himself he didn’t like the other boy, he was certain he liked Dean. Unfortunately, there wasn’t anything he could do about it. He turned back to the movie in order to distract himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know I've exaggerated this illness. I suffer from it so I know what it's like. Just go along with it for story's sake.


	6. ♫ That You'd Always Be Mine ♫

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here's more.

“Mr C Novak. Blah, blah, blah. Your results have been processed. Blah, blah, blah.” Cas recited the letter he received in the mail 12 days after the EEG to Dean and Balthazar. “I have an appointment the day after tomorrow.” Cas looked scared. For the first time since he passed out, he looked scared. “If they actually want to see me again that means there’s something wrong, doesn’t it?”

“Not necessarily. It could be them telling you you’re in the clear. But, yeah, there's probably something wrong.” Balthazar exclaimed.

“Crap. Crap. Crap.” Cas sat down. His heart was pounding.

“It doesn’t mean it’s anything serious though.” Dean reassured. “but whatever it is they have to warn you about it.”

“Crap. Crap. Crap.” Cas added.

“You need a drink, Cassie. I’ll fetch you some tea.” Balthazar stood up and left.

Cas began hyperventilating. “Crap. Crap. Crap.”

“Hey! Calm down. You’ve got a good support team, remember?” Dean winked and he pulled Cas up. “I don't do this often but, do you want a hug?” He opened his arm to envelope Cas. “You’ll be fine.”

They hugged for as long as it took for Dean to feel Cas relax against him. As they pulled away, Dean paused, their faces just a few centimetres apart. He could feel Cas’ breath on his lips and realised just how blue Cas’ eyes are. The perfect blue. When staring into them it was as if time had stopped and he was entranced. Without thinking, he shot in for a powerful kiss. He kept his mouth closed, allowing for no tongue entry as his hands slid down around Cas’ hips. He didn’t notice the small smirk on Balth’s face as he watched from the other side of the doorframe.

Then suddenly “Crap. Crap. Crap.” This time the words were coming from Dean’s mouth, not Cas’. “Sorry!”

“No, Dean, it’s- it’s fi-“ Cas began talking sensibly before stopping as Dean just walked out without a word.

“What the Hell Cas? Go after him!” Balthazar came around the corner.

“No. That’s not what he wants. He’s gone. Probably for good.” Cas slumped back into the corner of the sofa.

“Not true, Cassie. Not true.” Balthazar held his head in his hands and Cas plodded off upstairs.

* * *

The following day, Cas really wanted to go back to school and, with Dean gone, he had the opportunity to leave. He had no energy when he woke up at 0700 so opted for lots of coffee. Bad move.

Cas caught the bus to school. Deciding driving was too risky. Balthazar was still asleep so Cas crept passed his door and half-ran down the stairs and to the bus stop not even grabbing food, just coffee.

His head was spinning but he kept moving. He had English first. He thought he might just skip it but when his head started spinning more and more he realised he just needed to sit down. W _ell, here goes nothing._  He entered to find Dean wasn’t there yet. For a moment he thought that Dean may have skipped class so figured he might as well sit in his normal seat. When he saw Dean walk into the room with a short blonde and head to his seat his heart dropped.

“Oh, hey... Cas. You’re not supposed to be here.” He turned to the girl. “Sorry Jo, we should go and sit somewhere else.” He began to walk off.

“What the Hell, Dean?” Came from behind him, uncharacteristically loud coming from Castiel.

“What?”

“You can’t even stand to sit next to me anymore?” The smaller body said, voice deep and husky.

“That’s not it, Cas. We’ll talk later, okay?”

Cas sighed as Jo told Dean that “It’s fine. I’ll go and sit at the back. I insist.” She then whispered “As long as you patch things up with him. You put up a good front but you can’t fool me.” She gave him a fake intense glare before smiling and walking off.

“What happened to being gay?” Rushed out of Cas’ lips.

“Shhhh, Dude. I am. Just keep it on the down low, okay?”

“So you’re using the new girl to cover?” Cas assumed she’s new as he hasn’t seen her before.

“What? No! That’s just Jo. Yes, she’s new. She started last week. She moved here from Wichita.” He raised his eyebrows. “She was my best friend for ages. I did tell you about her. She’s been sitting in your seat whilst you weren’t here.”

Cas sighed. “Fine. We don’t have to talk about yesterday. I’m fine if you never want to talk again and we can just sit in silence for the rest of class. Better still, go and sit with Jo.” He had to stop talking because he was starting to feel light headed.

“No, dude. We need to talk.” He took his seat. “I’m sor-“ turned sharply to his friend “-Cas? Cas!” Cas passed out. “Oh, shit.” Dean muttered.

* * *

Cas woke up in the nurse’s office. Dean was leaning on the edge of the bed, head in arms, practically asleep. “Dean?” Cas croaked.

“I’m sorry.” Dean whispered in response.

“It’s... It’s okay. Water?”

“Sure. I’ll be right back.” Dean jogged off. Just moments later he returned with some water and some pills that the nurse said he could have. “Here.” He handed them over. “I’m sorry. I’m really, really fucking sorry.”

“Why?” 

“Why? Why? Because I fucking kissed you!” Rage was building in his voice.

“Because you kissed me or because you left without a word.” Castiel said, question dripping with spite.

“Both... I guess. Kissing you was a stupid move.” Dean broke an awkward silence by explaining that “Balthazar called. He’s decided to stay here for a few days. I told him I’d sort this all out and get you home.”

“Thank you but that’s not necessary. I’m sure I’ll be fine soon. I’ll call him to pick me up or catch the bus.”

“Like Hell you will! I’m driving you home, dude. That’s non-negotiable.”

“Seriously! Thank you for looking after me but I just.... don’t really want to be around people right now.”

“People? Or me?”

“I think you know what I mean. I just don’t want things to be awkward. Well, things _are_ awkward but I don’t want to deal with it whilst I’m not feeling well.”

“Okay, fine. No talking. We don’t even have to look at each other but I’m taking you home. I don’t care what you say. It’s for my own piece of mind. I can’t just leave you, I’d be worried.” Dean was adamant.

“Fine” Cas resisted the urge to fight back.

* * *

The car journey was exactly how Dean said it could be. Neither of them spoke, Dean kept his eyes on the road and Cas stared out the window. When they pulled up outside Cas’ house, Dean didn’t even bother getting out the car or saying bye.

He was just about to restart his baby’s engine when Cas looked directly at him and said “Thank you. Really. Thank you. It’s good to know I can count on you.”

“You’re welcome. Rely on the fact you always will whether you want to or not. I guess I’ll see you... sometime. I hope the hospital goes well. Hate me all you want but you please tell me the outcome. As I said earlier, I’d worry about you.”

“I don't hate you." He sighed. "In fact, do you want to come in? I’ll make you a sandwich as payment for all you’ve done and we never have to speak of yesterday again.”

“Sounds like a plan.” And that was it. It was a start and Dean prayed he would have his best friend back.

Dean ended up making the sandwich for Cas as he was unsure he’d be able to hold himself upright for long enough. He took it up to Cas’ bedroom as he’d ordered him to go and lie down. On his way up he passed Balthazar on the stairs. “I’m warning you, Winchester. Break his heart and I’ll break your neck.”

“Given there’s nothing between us, it’d be hard for me to break his heart.”

“You kidding me? There’s so much between you! You don’t even have to be able to hear what you’re talking about. Your body language... _please_ you cannot hide it. You’re constantly looking after him and you worry too much for him to be ‘just a friend’”

“He’s not ‘just a friend’. He’s my best friend. I’m allowed to worry.”

“Plus, Cassie tells me everything.” He gave him a knowing wink.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“See you later, Kiddo.” Balthazar left without explanation.

* * *

The two boys woke up next to each other the following morning. Not tangled together, like the first time they’d fallen asleep together. However, they were closer than comfortable, close enough that Dean could feel Cas’ deep, sleepy breaths faintly on his shoulder.

Or they were closer than what _should_  be comfortable, but he didn’t feel the need to move away. Dean looked over to the small boy, fast asleep and very pale. He thought about how blue his eyes would look next to the whiteness of his skin, and how much his deep, black, sex hair contrasted with his current ghost-like appearance.

“What are you doing?” Cas grumbled, half-conscious.

“Nothing.” Dean dismissed, not averting his gaze

“Seriously... What are you doing?”

Dean hesitated. He took a deep breath. “Fine... You know when I said I was sorry?”

“Which time?” Cas said mockingly, still half asleep, stretching.

“Shut up. I’m trying to be serious here.” Dean replied playfully and giving Cas a light punch on the arm.

“Okay. Continue.”

“Well, I said I’m sorry.... but” He hesitated. He knew the next few words to come out of his mouth could be life changing.

“But?” Cas prompted. 

“But... I didn’t mean it.”

Cas groaned and rubbed his eyes. "What?" He asked as if he thought he'd misunderstood.

“I’m not sorry.”

“Then why are you-” He didn't know how to finish his sentence so trailed off, leaving it to Dean's imagination.

The larger boy paused for a second, took a deep breath and sighed. “I did it and, if I was sorry, I couldn’t do it again.”

“What?” He repeated, louder this time, his voice full of shock.

Instead of explaining, Dean pushed Cas back down onto his back and gently leant over him, kissing him softly. He pulled back slowly to see Cas’ reaction. “Thoughts?”

“Yes” He said in a relaxed but puzzled voice, rubbing his eyes just to check he wasn’t still dreaming. “You?” was his simple response. Dean didn’t answer Cas. He chose, instead, to grunt in approval whilst diving back down and claiming his mouth. Slowly and passionately, they kissed. Dean opened his mouth slightly, using his tongue to timidly part Cas’ lips and invade his mouth. As he gently licked the roof of Cas’ mouth, he received a sharp, full-body, shudder and a faint groan, muffled by Dean’s own mouth. He saw this as an invitation to continue.

This lasted for a few minutes with Dean edging inch by inch over Cas so that he was half lying on top of him, groans becoming more frequent as the boys became increasingly breathless. Their kisses became the most passionate thing in the world.

Awkwardly, this is when Balthazar chose to faintly knock on Cas’ bedroom door and quietly open it after the lack of response. Shouting “Cassie, wakey wakey. Your appointment is in an hour and a ha-“ Upon noticing that Dean suddenly rotated from Cas, subtly but not subtly enough, wiping his mouth as he did so and clearing his throat with a soft cough, Balthazar simply added “Sorry. Sorry. Sorry!” and walked out. He yelled “FINALLY” from the other side of the door and laughed as he walked off.

“Well, at least we don’t need to find a way of informing your brother about our changed relationship status....” Dean broke the silence after a few moments.

“Is this seriously happening? Did I just imagine that? Am I still dreaming? Are you doing this out of pity?” Cas barely paused for breath.

“Yes, no, no, definitely not.”

Cas just smiled timidly.

“Well, we- um- we better get dressed.” He said awkwardly, getting out of bed.

“Yes, you’re already late for school.”

Dean laughed. “I’m not going to school today!”

“Why not?”

“Why not?” Dean repeated with a mocking laugh. “I’m coming with you to the hospital.”

“No. That’s not necessary. You shouldn’t skip class. Just come around later and I’ll fill you in.”

“Nope. Not happening. Once again, this is non-negotiable.”

“Dean.”

“This isn’t open for discussion, Cas. I’m coming. I want to.”

“Okay. Thank you.” By this point, they’d both sat down on the edge of the bed. So Cas leant in and gave Dean a quick peck on the lips before pulling back and adding “It this Okay?”

“Hells yeah.” He said with a huge smile before leaning in and mirroring Cas’ previous action with a hum of approval, then repeating “Hells yeah” with a smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sure when my next update will be but I hope you enjoyed.


	7. ♫ Or Would You Lie? ♫

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while.

They sat in the waiting room. Balthazar on one side of Castiel, and Dean on the other, reassuring him that it would be okay - even though, two weeks after he began to feel ill he was still feeling bad. 

When they called his name, Castiel panicked. Dean grabbed hold of his hand and smiled; a smile that was reciprocated as he stood up.

“So, why did you come today Dean?” Balth said without looking at Dean, as Cas walked off.

“Why wouldn’t I? I care.” He said as if it was ridiculous to question.

“That’s sweet but he doesn’t need you babying him.”

“I’m not and don’t plan on babying him. I’m simply reassuring him and being a shoulder to lean on.”

“And being a shoulder to lean on involves you sticking your tongue down my little brother’s throat?” Balthazar retorted, catching the other man off-guard.

“If that’s what comforts him, yes.” Dean said after a few moments of deliberation.

“So, you’re just doing it to comfort him? Not because you have feelings for him? This did come about all of a sudden. Just yesterday you declined that you had feelings for him and this morning I walk in on you mounting my little brother.”

“Of course I have feelings for him. I’m not doing it out of pity. I promise that I’m doing this for the right reasons. I just needed a kick in the right direction. Also, I definitely wasn’t mounting him.”

“Okay. Good. I know Cas really likes you so, break his heart and I’ll-"

“-break my neck? I know. Are you going to give me the all important talk?”

“Maybe in a few days, once I know you’re serious about him.” The big brother quipped. 

“I am serious, you’ll see. And if _you_  think this is surprising, how do you think _I_ feel? I’m completely freaked out. But I’m definitely serious.”

“Good. You better be because as soon as we know what’s wrong, I need to head back to college and I need someone to look after him.”

“What happened to not babying him?” Dean said with confidenc, appreciating the fact he was gaining Balthazar's trust - something he was secretly dying to have.

“You don’t need to be there to baby him, just to make sure he’s okay. I know he has Gabe and Anna and all of our cousins but I think you’re good for him. You make him happy.”

“I plan to keep making him happy.” The younger man said with a blush. 

After a few minutes of awkward silence, Dean growing an increasingly uncomfortable burning feeling, praying for some distance between himself and the older man, Cas came out of the doctor’s room. “That was fast. Is everything okay?” Came from a worried Balthazar.

“Um. Can we just go home? Please?”

They climbed back into Dean’s baby and drove to the Novak’s lake house so that Cas could have space of his own without his family getting in the way while he recovered. Cas quickly headed straight up to his room and locked the door before sprawling out over his bed and burying his face in his pillows.

Balthazar told Dean that he could be stubborn like this sometimes and they should just wait until he calms down and gets hungry but Dean refused to listen. He opted to simply sit on the floor outside Cas’ door, occasionally knocking and repeating “Cas, talk to me.” He wasn’t sure how long he’d sat there and said his friend’s name but it felt like an eternity.

Eventually Cas gave in and walked over, unlocking his bedroom door and throwing himself back on his bed. As much as he loved hearing Dean say his name, he’d worked out long ago that he would do anything his best friend asked him to. Dean walked in; shutting the door quietly behind him and laying on the bed next to his boyfriend (Although they’d not had time to actually confirm that yet).

“So, what’s wrong?” Then the floodgates opened. Cas just cried and cried. “Hey. Hey! What’s wrong?” Dean, naturally, enveloped him into a hug until he stopped crying, running a hand soothingly up and down the harsh ridges of Castiel's spine. Then he finally got an explanation. He was informed that the doctors think it’s epilepsy. That it isn’t serious (probably just generalised seizures) but they’d given him a small leaflet about it and after reading it thoroughly he realised that there was a slight chance of sudden death.

“I’m supposed to be strong and deal with it. That’s just the person I am. Why can’t I be stronger about this?” Cas questioned through the tears.

“You’ll get stronger, just give it time. You’ll find out more about this condition. Knowing you, you’ll look up some statistics and probably find that the chance of death is very very slim. And I know it sounds cliché but... I can be strong for you.”

“Thank you. I really need to hear that.” Cas said sincerely, wiping away the final tears.

“Well, you can hear it as many times as you want. So, what’s the next step?”

“They want me to go back soon and have another test, just to check.” He looked into Dean’s eyes, _so_  green, and simply curled up onto his chest and fell asleep. Dean hadn’t done this before. He hadn’t just fallen asleep with someone he was in a relationship with. Well, he’d never really been in a relationship before. With his hook-ups, he left almost immediately with a made up excuse, normally something involving joining the marines or having a meeting with the president - Barney Stinson style.

* * *

It was 0745 the next thing Dean knew. He didn’t recall falling asleep but evidently he did. Cas was still curled up on his stomach. He didn’t appear to have moved all night. The smaller boy awoke from his peaceful slumber with a shock. “Dean?”

“Yeah, Buddy?” Dean suppressed his yawn, trying to maintain some semblance of attractiveness despite his undoubtedly messy hair. 

“Thank you.” Castiel replied lazily, unwilling to mirror that sentiment. 

“For what?”

“Just for being here with me. It helps.”

“There’s no place I’d rather be.” He kissed the top of Cas’ head before they exchanged an intense stare, leading Cas to shuffle upwards and then they were kissing hungrily.

It was obvious that Castiel was inexperienced in kissing but Dean wasn't exactly a connoisseur himself so he let the sloppy exchange slide and looked deeply into the blue eyes above him. The moment passed timelessly as he moved up the last half inch so their lips could touch once again. Softly, sweetly, lovingly, they connected repeatedly for small pecks before deepening the kiss. So much more than a kiss was communicated when their lips joined. Unspoken words passed between the two; words of promise; words of commitment; words of reassurance. A kiss that was hard, but soft; fleeting but eternal. Their tongues got deeper and deeper into each other’s mouths as their kissing got more passionate.  He wasn’t sure how long they’d been making out for but he looked at the clock again at 0815. He glanced at the content look on Cas’ face and smiled. He then heard a quiet “Thank you, so much” from a tired sounding Cas - who proceeded to fall back to sleep.

Dean slid out from underneath his best friend and headed for the bathroom. He hadn’t noticed until now just how much he had to pee. He almost ran. Once he was done, he started pacing the floor. Thoughts getting all muddled up in his mind. He splashed his face with cold water and prepared to leave. He then looked down and saw the spot that he’d found Cas passed out in and thought back to the boy breaking down and confiding in him the night before. This triggered tears from Dean’s eyes as he had his own little break down. He wasn’t quite sure why, but he did it nonetheless.

When Cas woke up, Dean had gone. He saw a little piece of folded paper stood on the table.

_‘I’m sorry._

_It sucks that you may have this condition but I want you to know, if you want me to help, I’ll be there. You can rely on that. I promise._

_I have a test today and HAVE to be at school._

_Sorry I had to leave!_

_Dean x’_

Cas broke down again - almost as if he’d forgotten that he had epilepsy. When he saw the little kiss at the end of the message, his heart lifted a bit. _I actually **have** Dean now. _ The thought brought a smile to his pale face.

* * *

A few days later Cas received a letter in the mail saying that he needed to go back for a sleep deprived EEG. This meant he couldn’t sleep for 20 hours before the test.

Dean came round later and Cas told him he had to stay up all night. For most teenagers it was easy to pull an ‘all nighter’ but Cas wasn’t most teenagers. Dean, however, was. His exact words were: ‘Well, I think we can manage that...” followed by a wink and a long make out session sprawled out on Cas’ bed.

* * *

The appointment was scheduled for a week later and it said that in that week he shouldn’t drink any alcohol (which didn’t bother Cas much) and he should, ideally, have parental supervision at all times. Cas still hadn’t had a response from his father, Robert, (who was apparently still in Hollywood filming his next big TV series). So he settled for, what Dean called, Dearental supervision.

That week consisted of a _lot_ of make out sessions. Some days they decided just to skip school and lay on Cas’ bed watching movies. They’d made their way through almost all of the Marvel films and had moved onto random films Dean insisted Cas watch in order to be a proper teenager.

Every night, Dean snuck out of his own bedroom and drove the short distance to Cas’ house. Normally, he didn’t bother sneaking into his boyfriend’s room, he just walked in and made his way up the stairs. Balthazar had quickly broadcasted their relationship status to the whole of the extended Novak family so they didn’t need to hide anything. They cuddled up every night and Dean never tried to take their physical relationship any further than making out. For the first time in his life, Dean wasn’t in it for sex.

* * *

It got to the day before the EEG.

“So, ready to pull an all nighter, Cassie?” Balthazar questioned as they walked up the stairs.

Cas remained silent, already tired. So Dean chimed in. “Yup, we are!”

“‘What do you plan on doing?’

“Watch some films.”

”That all?”

“Probably”

“No making out?”

“That’s not all we do.” Dean reassured passionately. 

“Good”

There was obviously making out involved. Dean saw it as the only way to keep Cas awake. They put the first Lord of the Rings film on, then the second and then the third. They’d been watching the third for about an hour and a half before their attention was drawn to each other instead of the TV. Cas slowly moved from resting his head on Dean’s chest to lying completely on top of him. Their kisses started slow and passionate but became more and more impatient. Gradually, the two boys got harder as Dean rotated his pelvis up against Castiel's own, trying to create friction. Then, suddenly, Cas pulled away. “Wait, wait. I can’t do this.”

“It’s okay, we can stop.” The brunette's face showed he was both puzzled and frustrated.

“I need to explain.”

“You don’t have to, it’s fine. I can just put another movie on.” Dean was quite obviously turned on - he was painfully hard and it was killing him that they had stopped - but he respected his boyfriend's wishes.

“You know I said I knew I was gay after an awkward experience with a girl?” The smaller boy began.

“Yeah.”

He sighed. “Her name was April. She- she forced me to do things I didn’t want to do, you know? She didn’t really give much choice about anything during our brief relationship. She liked being in control. That meant in the bedroom too. I was  _fifteen_.” He stressed, feeling his eyes brimming with tears. 

A similar sigh. “So you’re not a virgin?” Dean liked the idea that Cas was completely clean and ready for him.

“I am.”

“So how..?”

“I managed to stop her. But, I don’t feel comfortable in those situations anymore. I’m actually surprised I’ve come this far with you.”

“It’s fine. I respect that. I could just put another movie on?” Dean tried to bury his agitation so it was inaudible.  

“How are you so understanding?” Castiel looked at him in awe, blue eyes shining with admiration. 

“Well, it’s amazing what picturing your middle school English teacher in a bikini can do.” Dean tried to joke. 

“Oh.” Was all Cas could manage. 

“Oh?”

“I feel bad. It’s not like I couldn’t feel how turned on you were.” Castiel looked away, wanting to do anything but see the pity in his boyfriend's eyes. 

“I know. You turn me on, Cas. I can’t help that. You’re you. You were noticeably hard too but you managed to stop. I respect you for it. I just want you to know that, you don’t have to do it, I won’t think any less of you if you want to stop.”

Castiel couldn't find the words to respond, simply remaining silent.

“Just come back over here and kiss me some more. I promise I won’t let it go any further. I promise I can resist you.”

“Thank you, Dean." He pecked his boyfriend's lips. "I’m not sure whether or not I should be offended by the fact you can resist.” He said playfully as he let Dean lean over him and invade his mouth once more.

He was tired and light headed when they stopped kissing - only separating because they only had an hour until they needed to leave.

“You don’t have to come.” Castiel said, full of uncertainty, the moment he pulled away. 

“Want to.” Dean responded, panting against Cas’ neck.

“If you’re sure?”

“Yeah."

* * *

Dean and Balthazar were once again left alone in the hospital waiting room in an awkward silence. “He told me what you did.” Balthazar finally voiced, breaking Dean from his unpleasant daydream. 

“What?”

“He was brave enough to tell you about April and you listened and respected his wish to stop even though you were turned on.”

“He told you I was turned on?”

“It’s just a speculation. I’ve seen the way you look at my little brother.” Balthazar teased. 

“It’s just dawned on me: I haven’t told _my_ little brother yet.”

“I’m sure little Sammy will understand.” The duo were in the middle of having an abridged version of ‘the talk’ when they were interrupted.

Cas exited the doctor’s room. “Let’s go home. I need sleep.” He didn't stop to check if the others were following him, simply making a beeline for the door.

“You’re not the only one” Dean gave a flirtatious wink, reaching for his boyfriend's hand as they left the building, wanting nothing more than to curl up together and take a nap.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I said before, I'm exaggerating the illness. I have epilepsy and so do some family members so I know it isn't anything like I'm describing Cas' symptoms but I couldn't be bothered to look up symptoms for any other illnesses so sue me.


	8. ♫ Or would You Run And Hide? ♫

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still exaggerating the illness.

The following day, on the way to school Dean took a deep breath and sighed “You like Castiel, right?”

“Of course I like Cas, why?” Sam raised an eyebrow. 

“Well, our relationship has... advanced.” The older boy struggled to get out. 

A shocked Sam asked “You’re dating?”

“Well, we haven’t actually been on a date but I guess.”

“Awesome.”

“Awesome? You’re okay with it?”

“Why wouldn’t I be? Cas is cool. He makes you happy. It' a little weird that we're dating siblings though." 

Dean cringed, he hadn't thought about it like that. "As long as you’re cool with it.”

“If I wasn’t, would that change anything?”

“I don’t know.”

* * *

Anna was waiting by the entrance when the Winchesters arrived at school.

“Crap.” Sam muttered to Dean.

“What’s the matter, Sammy? Trouble in paradise?”

“She doesn’t look happy.”

“Good luck.” Dean laughed as they got out the car.

Sam sauntered over to Anna as soon as he got out the car, reluctant to engage in the undoubtedly intense conversation. “Hey, gorgeous.”

“Sam. We need to talk.” Anna ordered.

“Talk about what?”

“The reason you’ve been cold towards me recently.”

“I haven’t.”

“Maybe not cold but something has changed. I want to know what it is.”

“Nothing's changed.”

“Sam!” Anna frowned.

“Okay. Maybe we’re not working out as well as we were to begin with. I don’t think anything should change though, do you?”

“Really?”

“Well...”

* * *

Cas didn’t go back to school for a while after his EEG because he still wasn’t feeling 100% better. He’d forced Dean to go in though, promising he wouldn’t die and he could come around after. So, Dean hurried over to the Novak household after school.

“Hey, Beautiful. Sorry I’m late, I had to be Sam’s chauffeur.” Dean greeted Cas as he walked into his boyfriend’s bedroom to find him lying on his bed watching TV and playing on his tablet.

“Beautiful?”

“Yeah. Beautiful. Just laying there you look... beautiful.”

“Well, thanks but could we just stick to Cas?”

“Fine. So, what’s the word, Cas?”

“It’s a shortened version of my name.” He said cockily

“Feisty, I like it.” Was Dean’s initial response before he received a disapproving look from Cas. “Fine. How are you doing today, handsome?”

“Not bad. Not great, but not bad.”

“What have you been up to?”

“Downloaded Sims. Got addicted.”

“Sounds fascinating. Don’t go living in that world. Remember your boyfriend’s out in the real world of real people."

A quick peck on the lips showed that the hint was taken. “Oh, but my boyfriend’s in here to.”

“You made me? Out of everyone in the world, real or fictional, you chose me. Why?”

“Because my world seems to revolve around you.”

“So it should. It’s only right seeing as though my world revolves around you. Let’s see me, then.” He said, sitting down on the bed and pulling Cas’ tablet closer to him and chuckling “My hair is much cooler than that!” He pecked his boyfriend on the cheek.

“You don’t really get a great deal of choice. I could give you a blue mohawk if you want?” He paused as Dean dismissed the remark. 

“And your sex hair is non-existent.” The brunette teased.

“I don’t have sex hair.”

“Oh, Beautiful, you do. Dark, messy, ‘just rolled out of bed’ sex hair.”

The shared a quick smile, momentarily entranced in each other before Cass turned away. “Care to play for a bit whilst I use the bathroom?” He handed his tablet over before slowly standing up from the bed with ‘dead legs’ from sitting all day. The groans warranted a giggle and a joke about being an old man from Dean before he hobbled off.

“Are we having sex?” Cas said upon return, looking at the screen. Yes. Dean had made them ‘WooHoo’ as the game makers liked to call it.

“Nope. _They_  are.” He gestured towards the screen.

“Same thing.”

“Really isn’t. Our sex life is non-existent. These two are going at it like there’s no tomorrow.” Dean paused, considering his previous statement. “Sorry, that was mean.”

“It’s okay. I’m the sorry one.”

“We’ve spoken about this, Cas. There’s no need to be sorry. I understand. We can go as slow as you like.”

“You’re an angel, Dean Winchester.”

“Nah, but you are, Castiel Novak.”

There was kissing again. Dean wasn’t sure how long it went on for but long enough for him to be breathless when he rose from on top of Cas. Then he lowered himself back down to devour his mouth once again. The next thing he knew Cas was tugging at the hem of his t-shirt, gently stroking his thumbs over the exposed skin as the ground together.Then he felt it being pulled up and his dick grow increasingly hard. His top was thrown on the floor as he reached down to Cas’ waist and slowly began lifting his boyfriend’s pyjama t-shirt up (he hadn’t been bothered to get dressed given he was only going to be seeing his boyfriend). Once Cas’ top was on the floor too there was a soft moan as the heat of skin-on-skin radiated through the boys’ bodies. Their kisses got more aggressive and overpowering.

Dean reluctantly pulled away, rotating and lying down on his back, gasping for air.

“Why did you stop?” Cas questioned.

“I want to know you feel comfortable doing this.”

“I guess I just got caught up in the moment.”

“I also want our first time to be special.”

“Anytime with you would feel special to me, Dean.” Cas said flatteringly, quite obviously still turned on.

“That’s great to hear but I mean it. Our first time is going to be really special.” He rolled onto his side to look into his boyfriend’s beautiful eyes. “It deserves to be, right? It’ll be _our_ first time together but it will be _my_ first time full stop. I need to make sure I know what I’m doing.” Dean was obviously still scared of taking the leap and admitting, with the simple act of just a hand job, that he was officially gay.

“Of course. I’m sorry.”

“No need to apologise. You’ll just have to daydream about me until we’re ready.”

“That, I will. Remember, it’s going to be my first time too.” He rolled over to rest his head on Dean’s chest and stroked his knuckle down the centre of his stomach, moving gently over the ridges of his abs. “So, you really do have a six pack?”

“Would I lie to you?” Dean’s soothing voice said as Cas grew sleepier on top of him. This was a regular occurrence. In the past week, Dean had probably only stayed at his own home once or twice. Cas’ bed was much more welcoming.

“Thank you. Thank you for being my friend, Dean. My only friend before was Gabe, it’s nice to have friends outside the family.” Cas muttered once Dean had thought his boyfriend had fallen asleep.

“I had no choice. You’re like a Siren. So enticing.” He kissed the top of his boyfriend’s head. “Anyway, your best friend can’t be a family member it doesn’t count.”

“Wouldn’t you say Sam was your best friend though?”

“Nope. At my old school I hung out a few people -including Sam - but Jo was my best friend. Well, still is I guess.” He paused, checking he hadn’t insulted Cas. “But, none of my friends could in any way match how good of a friend you are. I sure as hell wouldn’t want to cuddle up in bed with Jo.”

“Thank you, Dean.”

“No need to thank me, Baby.” With that final remark, Cas rested his head back on Dean’s chest and fell asleep, not caring that it was only 9pm.

* * *

The following day Cas decided to surprise Dean and go to school. He waited until Dean left to quickly get up, pack is stuff and leave. He walked down the corridor to head to Dean’s locker as soon as he arrived at the building that brought him and Dean back together (due to him passing out). He turned the corner to see his boyfriend leaning against his locker talking to Sam. He paused before going over, being nosey and trying to listen in.

“I’m telling ya. Boyfriend or no boyfriend, she deserves to have the night of her life with a Winchester.” Was all Cas heard Dean say before he turned around and quickly headed home to bury his face in his pillow and cry.

* * *

Dean went to see Cas when he finished school. “Hey, Beautiful. How ya doin’?”

“Piss off.” Cas rarely used language like that but he hoped it would distract Dean from his noticeably red eyes.

“What? Why? What happened?” He said protectively.

“You! You happened!” Cas’ voice got louder.

“What did I do?” The puzzled look on Dean’s face grew.

“Before you came along, I was fine being borderline popular, hanging around with Gabe and spending my time alone reading. You’ve come along and used me to make you seem popular. You like the popularity more than you like me. You want sex!”

“Of course I’m not using you! Not only are you my boyfriend but you’re also my best friend. There’s no way in hell that I’d put popularity above you. And of course I want sex. You’re _you_ , you turn me on but that doesn’t change to fact I’m refusing to do it until you’re comfortable with it. That’s the truth. I respect you too much to force sex upon you. I thought you knew that.”

“I think you’ll wait until I’m ready, but before that you’ll go and get it somewhere else.”

“Why would you think that?” Dean wasn’t sure whether to be mad or concerned at the fact his boyfriend thought he might cheat on him. “I’d never cheat on you.” He added in a softer, more worried voice.

“I heard you talking to Sam. You said someone deserved to have the night of her life with a Winchester, even though you have a boyfriend.”

Dean paused to think back to his earlier conversation. “No! Cas, I meant Sam! Sam likes someone but she has a boyfriend. I promise!” He stepped closer, reaching out to put his arms around his boyfriend.

Cas stepped back, away from Dean. “I don’t buy it. I’d like you to leave please. Now!” Cas threw his pillow at Dean and repeated “now” a lot until Dean surrendered and left, slowly turning around as he walked through the door in order to see his boyfriend once more before he left. He knew a fight was on the horizon. He’d never actually been in a real relationship before. ‘It was bound to happen because I’m inexperienced. Not to mention a total fucking idiot.’ He thought to himself repeatedly as he climbed in his baby, turned the music up and just drove around for a while to clear his head.

Not long after, he tried calling Cas but he, predictably, didn’t pick up. He then called Balthazar to ask for his opinion. “Do you not remember what I told you a while ago? I told you he was stubborn and you need to wait for him to be ready to talk.” Was the advice that he was given before Balth prematurely hung up.

So, Dean sent a text. _‘Cas, you have to believe me. It’s you and only you that I want. Promise. xx’_

He got an essay in response about an hour later. **_‘I’m afraid I can’t believe you, Dean. I know what I heard. You need sex and you think I’m a prude. That’s basically what’s going around in your mind right now, right? It’s so predictable. I should have known that someone like you wouldn’t fall for someone like me. I’m such an idiot sometimes. Balthazar told me you called him. Please don’t bother either of us again. Goodbye, Dean.’_**

_‘That’s not true, dude. Yes, I have been thinking about sex. But sex with YOU. You turn me on so much, Cas. I can’t help that. As I said, Baby, I was talking about Sammy, not me. I’m not going to stop bothering you. I’m going to keep calling and keep texting you until I’ve made you see sense. xx’_

**_‘I said GOODBYE, Dean.’_** Dean decided he’d leave it at that for now and take into account what Balthazar said about him being stubborn. Opting to wait for him to calm down before trying again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry. For the sad ending. I'll upload the resolution as soon as possible.


	9. Am I In Too Deep?

He decided that pie would help so he went downstairs to find his mum in the kitchen. He hadn’t noticed he had slight tears in his eyes until his mum walked over and hugged him. “What’s wrong, sweetie?”

“Nothing just... hungry.” Dean croaked.

“I don’t believe that for a second. Sit down and talk to me.”

“Is this about Castiel?” He hadn’t told his mum they were actually dating. He made Sam promise not to tell because he wasn’t sure how she would respond. However, his mum knew him well enough to know that they were more than friends..

“I screwed up mum. Without even doing anything to him.” There were proper tears running down his cheeks now.

“I’m sure you can fix it. You’re his knight in shining armour.”

“I don’t think I can. This is his last text.” He held up his phone, once again looking at **_‘GOODBYE, Dean’_** and started crying even more.

“It may not seem like it now but you’re devoted to him. You’re like his guardian angel. And don’t think I haven’t noticed that you sneak out to be with him every night. I guessed where you’ve been going. I haven’t made a comment about it because I feel he’s dependent on you now, and you on him. You need each other. He’ll realise that. I promise.” She gave him a hug and handed him some pie. “What happened?”

“Nothing. He misinterpreted something he overheard me say to Sammy and has got it in his head that I’m cheating on him because he knows my history... and because we’re not... you know.” Even his mum knew about all his hook-ups.

“Well, I’m sure you can make him see sense. I’m glad to know that this is a _real_ relationship for you, Dean. It’s nice to know you’ve turned the corner and aren’t just doing it for sex anymore. You _have_ turned a corner, right?”

“Yeah, I think so. Until a few weeks ago, I didn’t know I’m gay and it’s still new to me.” He explained before nonchalantly admitting “and I’m pretty sure I’m in love with him.” He sighed. “Wait, you knew I was gay?”

“Of course I knew. I knew before you did. That first time I saw Castiel, when he came around to work, I saw the way you two were looking at each other.” She paused and gave a loving smile. “A profound bond like the one you two have is hard to break, sweetie. You just have to do everything you can to get him back. I know you can do whatever you put your mind do, especially when it’s for love.” “I plan to, mum. I’m determined.” He smiled before standing up and heading upstairs to eat his pie alone.

* * *

Early the next morning, Cas heard a knocking at the door. “Gabe, can you get it?” He shouted. A few minutes later he heard the footsteps of two people coming up the stairs and his door swung open to reveal Gabriel at the other side.

“You need to talk to him, bro.” Were Gabe’s only words before he walked off, revealing Dean behind him.

“I said goodbye, Dean.” Cas’ voice was 100% grumpy and 100% serious.

“I know. But I refuse. I’m not letting you slip away from me like that. I like you too much, handsome.”

“Please stop calling me handsome, Dean. You can’t do that anymore, not now we’re not in a relationship. Not sexually, romantically and we’re not even friends. I now know what happens when you trust people. You’re just having a big, gay freak out. At this point you’ll either start denying you’re gay and go back to having sex with random girls or you’ll go and settle down with a new guy because you know how you truly feel. I don’t know why I expected that you’d actually like me in the first place. How do I know that you’re not just a great actor and have been pretending to be gay in order to get popular?”

“God, Cas! You know me better than anyone. I’m being serious. You know me more than mum and Sammy do. There’s no way in hell I’d use you. Just like there’s no way in hell I’m going to lose you. I promise that I wasn’t talking about another girl. I’m not having a big, gay freak out. I’ve come to terms with my sexuality. You were there. You were the one that made me realise.” He paused to await Cas’ response but his face just looked blank. So, he filled the silence, talking in a much softer tone. “I had a heart to heart with my mum last night. She said she’d seen the difference between me before and after we moved here and that it’s because of you.”

“That sounds rehearsed.” Was all that came from the smaller boy’s mouth.

Dean hadn’t rehearsed anything. He didn’t want to keep thinking over what had happened so decided to make it up on the spot. “It really wasn’t. It came from the heart.” He gave an endearing smile. Seeing a slight twitch in the corners of Cas’ mouth before his emotion dropped again and he sighed.

“No. I still want you to leave. I can’t trust you again. It may seem like an over exaggeration but I feel like this is something more than a simple misunderstanding and I don’t feel I can trust you, or anyone, again. You made me see that it was alright to trust, but threw it back in my face.” Cas didn’t mind that he felt he was repeating himself. As long as he got his point across he would feel satisfied. Well, that’s what he told himself. When in actual fact he knew he wouldn’t be satisfied without Dean.

With a huge sigh, Dean said “Is there _anything_ I can say right now to make you change your mind?” When he received a simple shake of the head he sighed again and quickly left before Cas could notice his eyes were watering. Only managing to mutter a quiet “Bye, Castiel.” before leaving.

On his way down the stairs he passed Anna. She asked what was wrong but instead of responding, he chose to shut his eyes and shake his head before practically running out the door.

* * *

Sam received a text from Gabe when he was in one of his morning classes. _‘Wht did ur dick bro do?'_

**_'What do you mean?'_ **

_'Hes not in class. He also lft my house prety fast dis mornin. Cas isnt hppy!'_

**_'Dean didn’t look very happy when he left home this morning. I’ll try and find out. I’ll get back to you.'_ **

_'U bettr! Tho were frnds, I may hav 2 kik his ass 4 braking Cas’ heart!'_  

Sam texted _' **I will. Please don’t.'**  _to Gabe before sending _ **'What the Hell did you do, Dean?'**_  to his brother.

It didn’t take long for him to get a response. _'Dont know what ya mean. Ya shudnt be txting in class, Sammy.'_  It appeared texting Gabriel had rubbed off on him. It made Sam furious that neither of them could type those few extra letters in order to string a sentence together.

**_'I got a text from Gabe. He said: 1) you’re not in class and 2) Cas is upset. Where are you and what did you do this morning?'_ **

_'Dont wanna tlk bout it, Sammy. Leave it, K?'_  

 _ **'NO! It’s not OK! I know if Cas is unhappy, you’re unhappy. It’s how it works with you, Dean. Don’t think I haven’t noticed! So, what did you do?'**_  

After a few minutes, Sam got a response. _'Y_ _a know when I said ‘he deserves 2 hav the night of her life with a Winchester? He thought I was tlkin bout me havin sex. Hes broken up with me.'_  

 _ **'Oh.'**_  Was his simple response, before sending another message saying **_'A_ _re you going to get him back or are you over?'_** He then texted Gabe to tell them that they’d broken up. He got a simple message back from Gabe, that basically said the Dean was a dick.

 ** _'I REALLY want him back... Theres nothin I want more right now...'_**  Naturally, Sam forwarded Dean’s text to Gabriel.

* * *

Gabe walked up to Cas’ room when he got home from school. He showed him the text, expecting a positive response. “He wants you back, Cas! That’s a good thing. Smile!”

“I don’t want him back though.”

“Why?”

“Why what?” Anna butted in as she walked past his door.

“I was asking Cas why he doesn’t want Dean back.”

“Wait! You broke up?”

“Um yeah. Sam didn’t tell you?” Gabriel said, not allowing Cas chance to talk.

“Errr. Sam dumped me.”

“Wow. Looks like I have two Winchester butts to kick tonight. You don’t seem too broken up about it.”

“Obviously, I’m upset. I don’t understand why and that’s really frustrating but I’m going to be optimistic. When I get an explanation, I’ll consider if he’s really boyfriend material. Please don’t kick his butt. I’m fine with you hurting Dean for hurting Cassie, but leave Sam. So, why don’t you want him back?” Anna said, turning her attention back to Cas.

“Trust issues. Could you two just leave me alone?” Anna and Gabe slowly walked out and shut the door behind them.

* * *

Sam opened the front door to find Gabriel stood in the rain. He stepped backwards in order to let him in but the look of sheer terror was painted across his face. “Hi, Gabe. Why the unplanned visit?”

“Because, Sammy, we need to talk. Man to man.”

“Well, I can guess what this is about...”

“No, you can’t. Anna told me to leave you alone. I’m here to talk about Dean and why Cas thinks he can’t trust your big brother.”

“Sure. Come in.”

Sam explained to Gabe about the misunderstanding. Gabriel seemed to understand it from the Winchester point of view. As Sam explained that Dean was referring to Sam and not himself having sex, Gabriel - being Gabriel - asked who the girl was that Sam wanted to screw. You can’t tell your best friend you like their girlfriend so he claimed it was Ruby, a girl is his English class.

“I’ll talk to Cassie about it. I’ll try and explain. You could come around later and help? I can’t have him moping around the house from now on. Make sure you tell Dean how sad Cas is and make him try again.”

“Will do. So, what’s new in the life of Gabriel?”

“Nothing really. Things are a little patchy with Jess. There isn’t really a spark between us but she’s so hot!” Gabriel pointed out what Sam had noticed the first time they’d met.

However, Sam felt that ‘spark’ with Jess. She was the reason Sam broke up with Anna. So he was also, indirectly, the reason Cas broke up with Dean. “I’m sure you’ll be fine. You’re a great guy, Gabe. I can guarantee she likes you. Anna said Jess had always thought you we cute, didn’t she?”

“She did. Thanks. I’m going to go now though. I’ll leave before I start questioning you about Anna. You won’t like angry Gabriel.”

“See you soon, Gabe.”

“Bye, Sammy.”

* * *

Sam went around to the Novak’s later on. Ezekiel answered the door “Ahhh, grasshopper’s lil bro, right? Gabe told me you were coming.” He decided to look past the grasshopper likening and stepped inside. Gabe walked past and simply pointed him in the direction on Cas’ bedroom. “Good luck, moose.” Sam already didn’t like Ezekiel. The youngest boy knocked on the door. “Cas, can I come in?”

The latter of the aforementioned opened the door and gestured for him to enter. “There’s really no point. You can’t say anything at this point to change my mind, Sam.”

“I won’t forgive myself if I don’t at least try.” This triggered a slight nod from Cas. “You should see how grumpy Dean has been without you, man. He needs you.”

“Needing and wanting isn’t the same thing.”

“He wants you too.” Sam paused. “He explained what happened to me. I need to explain to you what we were talking about when you overheard us. When he loosely said ‘a Winchester’, he meant me. There’s a girl I like but she has a boyfriend and I feel I need to respect that because her boyfriend’s a nice guy. Dean being Dean thought with his dick.” A slight pause. “That makes him sound bad." The boy muttered to himself. "I think he needed to tell me to do this because he was holding back all his thoughts about him having sex because of you. So, he told me I should go for it but I refused. Hence his loud, forced statement that you overheard. You tell no one about me, hear me?” Sam ended playfully his rant playfully. “Especially not Anna!”

“Okay. He told me all that though. It did sound more genuine coming from you.”

“He said it was all about trust with you, right?”

“Yeah. He was the one that taught me it was okay to trust and then threw it back in my face when we argued.”

“I don’t think he did. You can trust him, you really can. You should see him right now, holding it all in. Whatever it is you told him about, he won’t tell me. He normally tells me everything, but not this. Just think about it again, Cas. Plus, he’s been playing his guitar again since you had your fight and his sad songs aren’t as well played and written and his happy songs. Save me from the music.“ He slowly turned and walked out the room quietly saying “He needs you.” to Cas as he turned the corner.

* * *

Dean dismissively said “Hi, Cas.” as his (theoretically) ex-boyfriend walked into his bedroom later that day, before he was hit by shock and dropped his guitar. “Cas? What are you doing here?” He said edging closer.

“Hi, Dean. Sam let me in. I hope that’s okay?”

“It depends whether you’re here to break my heart even more or help me put the pieces back together.”

“The latter.” Cas said with a smile. "If you'll let me." The brunette opted to step closer and quickly peck Dean’s lips instead of explaining.

“Really? Why?”

“Anna and Gabe tried talking sense into me but it was Sam who succeeded. He said he needed saving from you and your guitar.” Cas sounded comfortable and cocky in Dean’s presence once again.

“What exactly did he say?”

“Your sad songs don’t sound good.”

“Such a dick. He’s probably right though. I enjoy writing the happy ones more.” He placed his hands firmly on his boyfriend’s hips before stepping in and reaching further around, bringing him into a proper hug as their crotches touched. Dean smiled at the familiar feeling. “So what else did he say?” Dean spoke into the crook of Cas’ neck, enjoying the closeness.

“He explained my misunderstanding again. I guess it sounded different coming from someone else’s mouth. He told me you... needed me?”

Timing it terribly, Mary chose this point to open the door to check if Dean was okay. “Oh, sorry honey. Hi, Castiel.” Dean rotated, not letting go of Cas but so he could look at his mum over his boyfriend’s shoulder.

“Hi, mum.” He then saw Sam walk past his door glancing in before moving along. “Sammy! Thank you. Thanks, for insulting my music, Bitch.”

“It’s fine, Jerk. I’m glad you’re both happy.” He walked off and Mary shut the door.

“Sammy’s right. I do need you. However, I _want_ you more. I don’t even care if it’s not sexually.”

“That’s nice to hear, Dean. I’m sure you’ll be glad to know I feel the same.”

“I am.” A long, passionate kiss was shared between the two. “More than you could ever know.”

“So” Cas said, briefly tearing their lips apart and clashing them back together again. “I was thinking” another kiss was shared. “Lake House? Tomorrow? Special enough for you?”

Their lips were joined again. Dean pulled away from Cas and moved to sit cross legged in the middle of his bed, gesturing for Cas to come and sit in front of him. “Sounds perfect. If you’re sure.” Cas sat facing his boyfriend, knees just touching.

“I’m certain. I’m ready.”

“How about we go on a proper date first? I don’t think you can say that curling up in your bed every night is actually dating.”

“What are thinking of doing?”

“Bowling or movies?”

“You pick.” Cas said playfully.

“Both.” Dean leant in to quickly kiss his boyfriend before lying on his back and stretching his legs either side of Cas. Cas copied this action and laid next to Dean, eventually curling up and resting his head on Dean’s chest.

“I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you too, Gorgeous.” Dean placed a kiss on the top of Cas’ head before grabbing the remote for his iPod docking station and cranking the volume up to play Led Zeppelin ear-burstlingly loud.

“Wow. Romantic.” Cas mocked.

“What? It’s my favourite song!” He defended.

“I know it is. I also know it was influenced by Lord Of The Rings. Not exactly romantic.”

“You know my favourite song? More to the point, you know about the Lord Of The Rings references?”

“Yes. I pay attention to your life, the films you make me watch and song lyrics. Perhaps in even measures” Cas teased.

“Well... I love Lord Of The Rings and I love Led Zeppelin and I love... spending time with you..” He stuttered. _‘Crap. Too soon!’_ His head went to Ross telling Mona he loved her on _FRIENDS_ as he acknowledged the smile drain from Cas’ face. “Thus meaning,” he added. “that all make me happy... Yeah, I don’t actually have a reason. I just felt like listening to the song.” He stuck his tongue out playfully at Cas.

“I quite like this song. I’m not sure it’s their best though.”

“How fucking dare you?”

“Travelling Riverside Blues is good.”

“It is impossible for you to become anymore perfect.” He nuzzled at his boyfriend’s head.

“Perfect is absolute. One cannot physically get _more_ perfect.” “Technicalities.”

The two boys just laid in bed together, barely talking for what felt like hours, until Cas had to go home.


	10. ♫ Have I lost my mind? ♫

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, yes, hello there. It's been a while. A loooonng while (few days short of 2 years). I wasn't really planning on finishing this but I had a change of heart. This has been complete for years but I never got around to posting it. It needs proof reading and formatting but I hope to post a chapter a day until it's done.

It was Friday night; Dean rushed over to the Lake House before their date after taking Sam home. “Hey, Handsome!” Dean greeted Cas with a kiss.

“Hi, Gorgeous.”

“It’s weird when you say it.” Dean stated.

“Because I’ve been given the roll of the girl in our relationship. It’s not fair.” He said playfully.

“It’s not like that.”

“I’m okay with it. Maybe that means you could take lead tonight. You’re more confident than me anyway.”

“If that’s what you want. I mean, we don’t have to do this if you feel uncomfortable.”

“I know you want to Dean and I want to give you what you want.”

“You don’t have to do it for me. More than anything, I want you to be happy. If you’re not happy doing this then I’m not happy, capiche?”

“I am comfortable. You're the reason I feel comfortable and I can’t think of anything I’d rather do than spend the night with you. No Gabe, no Balthazar, no Anna.”

“Okay but when it comes to it you say the word and we’ll stop. Baby steps, right?”

“Right. Let’s go on our date first though.” Cas said with a smile. Grabbing Dean’s hand he practically dragged him out the door to the Impala. 

* * *

 

As soon as they stepped in the door of the Lake House after their date, Cas pounced on Dean. Their kisses were fast and desperate. They slowly made their way to Cas’ bedroom, lips not parting at all, struggling to get up the stairs and giggling when Cas slipped and Dean caught him, lifting him up and carrying him to the bed with his legs wrapped tightly around him. Cas fell down on the bed first, Dean promptly falling on top of him. Dean sat up so he was straddling his boyfriend to pull his leather jacket off, leaving enough room for Cas to do the same with his coat. He then swooped back down to reclaim his boyfriend’s lips.

Their kisses slowed so that they were less hungry and more passionate. Groans came from the throats of both boys as tongues invaded each other’s mouths. The making out had been going on for quite a while before Dean felt Cas moving awkwardly underneath him trying to kick off his shoes. He gave a childish laugh at his boyfriend’s struggle before giving in and turning around to help, dropping all four trainers and four socks on the floor. As he turned back around, he paused, just looking down at Cas.

“What? Is there something wrong, Dean?”

“No, baby. Everything’s perfect but I can’t do this-”

Cas sat bolt upright. “What? If you’re going to say something about me feeling uncomfortable, don’t. I’ve never felt more comfortable that right here with you in the moment.”

“It’s nice to know that, gorgeous, but that’s not it... I can’t do this without....” Dean continued.

 _‘Protection’_  Immediately jumped to Cas’ mind.  _‘I’m not ready to go that far yet.’_  He verbalised his thoughts anyway. “Protection?”

“No! No. I wasn’t planning on going that far, if it’s okay with you?”

“Thank you, I was hoping you’d say that. So, without what?”

“Without telling you I...” He swallowed hard. “...without telling you I love you.” He added in a quieter voice. “I know it’s probably too soon but... I do. I love you. Is that okay?”

“That’s perfect. I was hoping you would have said it the other day. I was ready to say it back. Because I do. I love you, Dean Winchester.” With that, Cas was being kissed viciously once more. Dean was now clawing at Cas’ shirt, trying to get it off of him as fast as possible.  Cas reciprocated and went for Dean’s. That feeling of skin against skin, which they had only experienced once before, seemed completely familiar and natural. He knew that any minute Cas could bail and he’d have to stop everything so he’d been waiting for his boyfriend to make the first move. After a while, the kissing slowed slightly as Cas went for Dean’s belt, timidly undoing it.

“You sure you’re okay with this, baby? We could leave it.”

“Certain. I really want to.” Cas sped his actions up, tearing off his belt and running the new leather seductively over Dean’s bare torso before dropping it on the floor. This triggered a sigh of bliss from Dean.

“Good, because you’ve turned me on so much right now I might have to kill you if you force me to stop.” He saw the fear rise on Cas’ face. “That was sarcasm, dumbass. The offer of stopping is always there.” He closed the gap between their mouths once more.

Cas laughed. “I think I believe you’d kill me. I can feel you hard through your jeans against my stomach.”

“Fine. You turn me on so fucking much, Castiel Novak. SO MUCH!” He said as he felt Cas reach down and start pulling down his jeans, followed by his own. “Fuck.” He sighed.

Cas chuckled when he looked down and saw that his 18 year old boyfriend was wearing Captain America boxers.

“Fuck indeed.” Cas whispered as he felt his erection bounce out of his jeans against his stomach.

Dean noticed, as he felt himself begin to leak, that Cas swearing turned him on more than it should. He was desperate.

“You ready, baby?” He comforted.

“Yes.”

“I’m going to take care of you, don’t worry. We’ll take it slow and make it a perfect memory. Just remember that you’re here with me, not her and I love you.”

“I love you too.” Were the last words Cas remembered saying as Dean ran his hand under the rim of Cas’ boxers. He curved his hand around Cas’ butt then moved his right hand around giving his boyfriend’s dick a slow stroke.

“Now, I’ve only ever done this to myself. Don’t blame me if I do anything wrong.” He looked pleadingly into Cas’ eyes before jokingly adding “Well, I’ve done SOME of this to myself.” He winked. With that, he pulled off Cas’ boxers completely and began giving slow strokes to his bulging dick. He earned himself a few soft groans as Cas rubbed against him. After a while, he decided it was  _now or never_  as his lips left Cas’ and he moved his head down. He teased as he ran his cold nose slowly down his boyfriend’s stomach and kissing just above his dick.

He took a deep breath and he was there. He took the tip of his boyfriend’s dick into his mouth and circled the underside of the head with his tongue, forcing a huge groan from Cas. Cas’ left hand was gripped tight, tightening and loosening the sheets. His right hand remained in Dean’s short, soft hair. He took this as an invitation to move his head further down and lick slowly up the large vein on the bottom of Cas’ hard, fully erect penis. The smaller boy’s hips thrashed upwards so Dean pinned them back down, wanting to give Cas a mind-blowing, memorable first time and not wanting him to climax too soon. He carefully moved his head up and down, noticing the salty smell in the room as he triggered beautiful sounds from Cas’ mouth. “Dean, Dean, DEAN” He repeated. The sound of Cas calling his name, desperately but lovingly, turned Dean on a lot. After about seven minutes he was still going, neck aching, wondering how Cas was lasting so long whilst he was so turned on, but grateful because it meant he could make Cas’ orgasm more powerful than he thought he would. He was starting to doubt whether he was doing it well enough and that was why Cas hadn’t come yet after a few more minutes. However, that thought didn’t last long because he heard the beautiful words “Dean, I’m going to-“ come from his boyfriend’s perfect lips.

Dean’s lips briefly left Cas. “It’s fine. Let go. Picture me and let go.” His mouth joined Cas’ dick again, wondering if what he said was too cheesy. One last lick of the underside of his boyfriend’s fully erect penis had Cas squirting long, hard streams into Dean’s mouth. “It’s okay, Baby. You alright?” Dean said, swallowing all of it.

“Yeah, perfect. Thank you, Dean.” He said breathlessly and sleepily.

“No need to thank me. This is my job. What use am I if I can’t make you happy?”

After he took a few moments to catch his breath, Cas looked down, noticing Dean stroking his own, painfully hard dick. “Stop.” He muttered.

“What? Sorry.” Dean said puzzled and horny beyond possible, releasing his tightly clenched hand.

“Come up here.” Cas grabbed Dean’s chin between his thumb and forefinger, pulling him back up so they could kiss. “Let me.” He said seductively, quickly flipping Dean over onto his back and slowly pulling down his boxers and grabbing his penis.

He made a snide remark about Dean’s underwear being adorable. “HEY! Superheroes are cool. This is the real me. I didn’t feel the need to put anything else on because you deserve to see the real me.”

“Balthazar described  _you_  as a superhero a while ago because you kept saving me.” Cas said timidly.

“I’ll save you as many times as you need saving. I can be your hero, Baby.”

“You’ll have to guide me through this though. Tell me what feels good. I don’t even have experience doing this to myself.” He added shyly.

“You don’t have to. Just relax. I know it’s quite tiring being that blown away. Please tell me you were blown away.” Dean thought about the fact he’d just given Cas his first ever orgasm.

“I was more than blown away, Dean. I need to do this, I WANT to, in return for what you just gave me.” He leant over to kiss his boyfriend, penis still in hand, feeling as if it were growing, but it looked like it was impossible for Dean to be more turned on.

It must have been killing him. They kissed for another few minutes before Cas started little by little stroking Dean’s dick. “Just tell me if I’m doing it wrong.”

“It’s fine you don’t have to-“ he cut himself off “-holy crap. Keep going. Just like that. Ahhh”

Their lips joined again as Cas’ speed increased. Still lightheaded after his mind-blowing orgasm, his rhythm was sloppy. It didn’t matter though because Dean was too turned on. When Cas licked the roof of his mouth, his whole body shook and his hips flared up. Cas pushed them down, he’d made note of all the things Dean did to make his so memorable, and with one last quick flick of the wrist Dean was coming all over his hand.

“FUUUUUCK. “ Dean managed to verbalise, before falling in a coma-like state with Cas on top of him. “Wow. Just. Wow.”

Cas giggled. “Wow, indeed. You’re amazing, thank you Dean.”

“You’re welcome but as I said, there’s no need to thank me. I love you. I’d do anything for you.”

“I love you too.”

After a few moments, Dean slid from underneath Cas and off the end of the bed, still gasping for breath, and dragging his reluctant, sloth-like, groaning boyfriend with him. “Come on. We need a shower.” He said, looking down at the sticky, hardening mess on their stomachs.

As they walked into Cas’ en suite Dean looked down at the floor, to the spot he’d where he’d found his best friend unconscious. He suddenly blurted out “I cried, you know? On the day of your first hospital appointment, you broke down in tears in my arms. While you were asleep, I got up to pee. I looked down here and started crying at the image of you passed out.” He continued to drag his boyfriend towards the shower.

“Wow. I made an alpha male cry. What are the chances?” He ended mockingly.

“Shut up! I’m being open and honest here. Something I’ve never done before. I just wanted to let you know how much I care. We hadn’t even been dating a day and I was in tears.”

“I love you for that.” Cas sealed with a kiss as they stepped into the shower.

“It feels good to finally be able to say: I love you too, Gorgeous.” Dean said after parting their kiss momentarily. He felt his cock begin to harden again.  _‘Crap. Cas won’t be ready to go again.’_  he thought. He was wrong. Cas had felt Dean’s erection and decided to reach down. Dean felt, surprisingly, that Cas, too, was hard again. He began grinding their hips together whilst kissing passionately, creating friction and groans from both boys. This went on for a long, long time. As Cas parted their bodies slightly, Dean reached his hand down to take Cas’ dick only to be forced away. Cas was too tender to be touched. Cas was wobbling about slightly uneasily. Dean had made his boyfriend come that quickly, he felt like a god. He then realised that that orgasm wasn’t nearly mind-blowing enough to compete with his first and he’d have to make up for it later on.

He knew it would take only moments until his came too, he’d probably be done with a few more passionate kisses. Before he knew what was happening, he opened his eyes to find Cas was no longer in front of him. He looked down to find his head between Dean’s legs, staring at his bobbing erection. “You don’t need to do that. Baby steps, remember?”

“I want to. I want to do it more than anything.” Cas said as he coyly took Dean into his mouth. It really didn’t take much to make Dean come. Cas was a great pupil. He memorised what Dean had done and mimicked his movements. A few licks at the underside of Dean’s dick and slowly circling the head had him spurting into Cas groaning loudly. Well, into Cas, onto Cas. It’s the same thing really.

Cas stood up, catching Dean who looked like he was about to pass out in bliss. He wiped away the come that was dribbling down his chin with his hand as Dean grabbed his wrist, pulling it away from his face and proceeding to lick of the remnants of his own spunk from by his boyfriend’s mouth.

“I really, really fucking love you.” Dean hummed.

“Well, I really, really fucking love you too, Dean Winchester.” Cas reciprocated.

Dean groaned. “Don’t say that. You know you turn me on when you swear.” He noticed his boyfriend blush. “That was amazing, best orgasm ever, Baby.”

“Well, I learned from the master.” He gestured to Dean, still supporting his weight. “Let’s go to sleep.” He dragged Dean out of the shower, grabbing some towels as they headed for the bedroom. “The perfect end to the day.” He stated as they snuggled under the sheets in their birthday suits. It really was perfect.

“I apologise.” Came from Dean’s mouth as he regained his strength.

“Why?”

“Your second orgasm in no way matched the standards of your first. It was only mediocre, I should have done better.” Dean admitted.

“You couldn’t have done better. It was perfect. You have time to make it up to me, anyway. I plan on doing this very often, you know?” He winked.

“Well, I’m sure we can manage that but do you think it might become less special the more we do it?”

“No, I think it will always be perfect, whether it’s the first or the hundredth time we do it.”

“One hundred times? Are we going to manage that?”

“Easily.” Cas smiled.

Dean reached down stroking Cas from his shoulder to his hip, brushing gently across his dick as he brought his hand back to Cas’ waist. Surprisingly, he found a half-erect penis. Half-erect wasn’t good enough, he could do better. He rolled Cas onto his back and lay on top of him. They kissed frantically and Dean felt Cas’ erection harden suddenly against his own dick. “You ready to go again, gorgeous?”

“Definitely. To quote the love of my life: you’ve turned me on so much right now I might have to kill you”

“He’s a very smart man.” Dean said as he pulled his mouth away from Cas’ and once again slid his mouth down to meet Cas’ erection.

~

Dean loved waking up to Cas. He loved waking up to naked Cas more. His boyfriend’s head was still on his chest as he stroked his hand softly down Cas’ back. He was still sleeping like an angel. Dean kissed the top of his head and whispered “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” Cas hummed.

“I thought you were still asleep.” Dean said embarrassedly.

“I was. Now I’m not. Why did you say it if you didn’t think I’d hear?”

“I just... needed to say it. I felt like I’d burst if I didn’t.” He kissed the top of the smaller boy’s head again.

“That’s sweet.”

Dean groaned. “Don’t say that! I’m an alpha male. Alpha males aren’t allowed to be sweet!”

“Au contraire. My boyfriend is.”

“No he isn’t.” Dean teased. “Are you getting out of bed today?” He said to Cas, who had still barely moved.

“That’s not in my plan, no.”

“Sounds good. So, what IS in the plan?”

“I was thinking we could listen to some music, just lay and talk and then continue with what we were doing last night. Views?”

“Sounds perfect!” He drew Cas up so their mouths could join. “One problem.” He said, pulling their lips apart. “I’m starving.”

Cas sighed. “I’ll make some breakfast. You stay here.” He pulled himself up.

“Nope. I can’t let you do that.” Dean said, pulling him back down. “You really would be taking the woman’s role if I let you make breakfast. I’ll do it. You stay.”

“I’ll come with you. It’s my house after all and I honestly don’t know how you would cope without me by your side for five minutes.” The both got up. Cas suddenly realised they were both still naked.  “Oh, um.” He grabbed his boxers and quickly pulled them on.

“It’s not like I haven’t already seen it.” Dean winked and licked his lips. He pulled his own boxers on. “It’s beautiful, just like the rest of you.” He closed the gap between them, bringing Cas into a warm kiss.

~

After they’d made breakfast they went back to bed to eat. It was obvious how hungry Dean was as his food lasted for just a fraction of the time Cas’ did. They both finished and placed their plates down before cuddling up again, Cas once again resting his head on Dean’s chest.

“Sing to me.” Cas ordered cheesily.

“Are you sure you want to suffer through that?”

“Certain.”

“What do you want me to sing, Beautiful?”

“Something you’ve written.”

“I’d rather not.” Dean looked shy. “It’s not that great.”

“If you did it, I’ll think it’s perfect. I promise I won’t judge you.”

“Fine... um...” He began to sing.

_‘I believe in your strength, though I understand you felt alone_

_because when you need a friend there’s no one strong_

_to fall back on and your past will still burden you but I'll_

_hold you through the pain._

_So, so in the end it’s not just you, with your memories and your scars_

_fall on me if you ever forget how beautiful you are._

_I believe in your words and your eyes_

_and when you speak of your dreams_

_I realize that I will envy whoever you give your heart to._

_So, in the end it’s not just you with your memories and your scars_

_fall on me if you ever forget how beautiful you are._

_And I will never let you...... fade away._

_And I want you to know that I love you,_

_for all you are and all that you’ll be._

_So in the end it’s not just you with your memories and your scars._

_Fall on me if you ever forget how beautiful you are are are are.’_

 

His boyfriend just stared at him, open mouthed, adoringly. Dean looked down to find Cas had tears in his eyes. “You okay?” He whispered, feeling water begin to pool up in the back of his own eyes.

“Yeah. Yeah. You really do have a dreamy, beautiful voice. It felt so personal.”

“Thank you, Gorgeous. It was personal. When we broke up, initially, I didn’t want to believe it. This is what happens when you leave me alone with just my thoughts and my guitar.”

Cas didn’t know how to respond so he quickly attached himself to his boyfriend’s lips. “Thank you. Thank you for not giving up on me.”

“I couldn’t if I wanted to.”

“So, when did you write this?”

“I wrote it the night we had our argument.”

“Erm... and you wrote it about me?”

“Yeah.” He hesitated.

“You said I love you.”

“Erm, yeah... I did.”

“Wow. Did you mean it?”

“Yeah... I did.” He repeated.

“Wow. Even back then? When I was being a fucking idiot?”

Dean really needed to get used the Cas swearing. “Even back then.”

“That surprises me. Thank you. I love you so much.”

“There’s no need to say thank you. I would have been there for you even if you didn’t want me to. I couldn’t change that. Your epilepsy, your past, I’m here for you. I think, ever since we met, I would have done whatever the Hell you wanted me to do for you.”

“It would appear that was the same for me too. You persuaded me to have a party and drink and it was down to you that I came out. I think you changed me for the better.”

“Are you sure about that? Since I’ve come along you’ve stopped watching the films you watched with your mum, you’ve started swearing and it was down to me getting you drunk that you passed out. As much as the swearing turns me on, I don’t think any of these are changes for the better.”

“I’m absolutely certain. I was watching the films to live on my past memories of my mother. I now realise that she’d want me to live in the present and create new memories. You’re helping me with that.” He winked. “ _great memories_. I was thinking about the epilepsy. At the start, I wanted to blame you but I would have had to find out sooner or later and sooner is normally better than later. Plus, you were the one that saved me every time I fell.” He looked up and gave his boyfriend a quick kiss before resting his head back on Dean’s chest.

“As long as you don’t regret it.”

“Regret what? Being with you?” He received a small nod. “I don’t regret it for a second. These past couple of days have been great. I love going to sleep next to you and I love waking up next to you. I love waking up next to you naked even more. I love that we can talk or not talk and it’s never awkward. I love that you’re so patient with me. You’re so considerate and selfless. I love that you didn’t give up on me and you even wrote a song about it. I love that you broke into the Lake House to look after me instead of going to school. I love that you worried about me. I love than you rushed around every afternoon just to sit and watch a film with me. I love you for laying and holding me when I cried. I love you for snuggling up in bed with me every night without expecting any physical act of sex. I love that you stopped kissing me when you thought we were moving too fast for me. I love you for telling me that you cried. I love that you’re an alpha male but would still date a nerd. I love that you’ve made me loosen up and realise what fun actually is. I love that you get along well with Gabe and you can tolerate Balthazar. I love that you said that our first time should be special and I love that we went on a proper date and said I love you before we made love.”

“Wow. That was quite a speech.” He felt like he could burst out into tears at any point.

“Why? Do your regret it?” Cas worried.

“WHAT? Hell no!” Dean tried to act macho again then dropping back into his sweet ‘chick flick moment’ voice. “I love you so much it hurts. We haven’t been dating long and I know that I love you. I love you so much you gave me inspiration to write a song again. I love that you’ve opened up to me and you trust me. I love that you were cute enough to make Sims of us to keep you company whilst I was at school. I love that you got jealous when you saw me with Jo. I love that you willingly let me introduce you to modern films and classic rock. I love that it was YOU that turned an alpha male gay. I love you for forgiving me. I love you for getting jealous before forgiving me. I love you for agreeing to come here with me. I love that we had a cute little clichéd debate after we went bowling about who was the best and for agreeing to watch films I want to watch.  I move here from Wichita and all of a sudden BOOM, my life gets turned upside down due to you. I just love life a lot more now you’re in it.

“I couldn’t love you any more right now, Dean. I don’t care if I’m never this happy again. That speech was perfect. Thank you so much.” He reached up to kiss again. This time it lasted a lot longer and was a lot more passionate. Dean gently grabbed the back of Cas’ neck and ran his fingers through his thick, messy, sex hair, groaning into his boyfriend’s mouth. The kiss lasted for what felt like eternity. When they pulled away, neither boy felt the need to take it any further. They were quite content just to lay in bed together forever. Dean surprised himself when he realised that he was very turned on, but didn’t feel the urge to give even a hand job to his beautiful boyfriend laid on top of him. He was happy just being together. This is something Dean would have never thought would happen to him. This may be because, until Cas came along, he never thought he’d be able to settle down and be truly happy with the, once seemly insignificant, life he lived.

“I think we need some more exercise.” Dean winked.

~

At around 2pm the couple pulled themselves out of bed and headed to the kitchen. As they walked through the lounge they saw Gabriel sat on the sofa, watching TV.

“Gabe?”

“Yeah, Cassie?”

“How long have you been here?”

“A while.”

“Were you here when we-“

“-fucked each other’s brains out?” Gabriel interrupted. “Yes.”

 _Damn it._  “Um, what are you doing here?”

“I had this date. She got kind of obsessed and she knows where we live. I needed to get away from her so I came here.”

“What have you been doing?”

“I came, I hid, I finally watched Downton Abbey.” He chuckled.

“Um, sorry for the noise.”

“It’s fine, Cassie. We’ve both heard Balth doing worse. I’m just glad you’re happy.”

The couple kept walking towards the kitchen to grab some lunch. They made Gabe a sandwich too and headed through to sit with him. “So,” Dean started. “You had a date? With Jess?”

“No, I broke up with Jess yesterday. Something just didn’t seem right. She didn’t seem as ‘into’ me as she used to.”

“Sammy will be happy.” Dean mocked with a smile.

“Why?”

“He’s had a ‘thing’ for Jess for ages.”

“Whilst he was dating my sister?”

“Yes. It’s actually all down to that that Cas and I broke up.” He placed his hand on his boyfriend’s knee and gave him a reassuring squeeze. “I told Sam that Jess deserved to have the night of her life with a Winchester.”

“Dude... Your brother is 14 and you’re encouraging him to have sex? You’re like the most awesome big brother in the world, even if I should be hating you for trying to make my girlfriend cheat on me.”

“Meh, I don’t think it matters when you have sex, as long as you’re sensible about it. I was doing it regularly when I was 14.” Dean said nonchalantly.

“What?” Cas chimed in.

“I’ve never really given a fuck about who I fuck. I just know it feels good.” He quickly realised what he’d said. “Oh crap! You know that’s not how it sounds, right? I didn’t used to. I figured I’d never fall in love, so what was the point in caring who you sleep with. That was, until you came along.”

Cas looked a little downbeat. “Gabe, could you give us a minute?”

“Sure thing, little bro.” He stood up to leave.

“Gabriel, you’re less than a month older than me. Please stop calling me little bro.”

“Sure thing,  _bro_.” He walked through to the kitchen.

“Cas, you know that was the old me, right?”

“I’d like to think so.”

“I’ve never been in love before. I’ve never felt like this.”

“I don’t doubt that you’ve changed, Dean. I love the new you. I just didn’t realise you’ve had so much experience. How am I meant to measure up to all the girls you’ve been with during the last 4 years?”

“You already have, Cas. You’ve made me realise the true me. You’ve helped improve me.” He spoke quieter, “You gave me the best damn orgasm of my life. Seriously.”

“Thank you, Dean.”

“No, thank YOU, Gorgeous.” The shared a brief kiss before Dean shouted “You’re safe to come back in now Gabe. You can stop eavesdropping.”

“I wasn’t eavesdropping. Why would I need to know that Cas gave you the best damn orgasm of your life?”

“Gabe, that’s your brother you’re talking about.”

“HALF-brother. The half makes all the difference, DeanO.”


	11. ♫ I don't care... ♫

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter title is misleading but here's another!

Cas hadn’t spent a lot of time at school since he became ill so when he decided he wanted to go back full-time, Dean was sceptical. Cas was feeling a lot better and he’d got over the shock of having the condition but Dean wasn’t sure he was up to it. Another thing that Dean knew would come with Cas returning to school was their relationship becoming public. They’d asked Gabriel and Sam to keep quiet about it so they could announce it in their own time. Whilst Cas wasn’t at school Dean had been hanging around with Gabe and the rest of their friends because he HAD become popular for just being friends with the Novaks and he knew when he told people Cas was his boyfriend that he would either climb to the top or fall to the bottom of the social hierarchy. The plan was to join the lacrosse team in an attempt to keep his popular status. It wasn’t as much that he needed to be popular, more to do with the fact he didn’t want to be excluded from social groups. He felt guilty about the fact he was even thinking this because it felt like these thoughts were betraying Cas.

“Are you mad at me?” Dean asked as he picked Cas up on Monday morning.

“Of course I’m not, Dean. Why would you think that?”

“For not coming clean and being public about our relationship. I’ve been going to school for ages since we became  _us_  and I’ve not told anyone. I asked Gabe and Sammy to stay quiet about it and I feel guilty.”

“There’s no need, Dean. I’ve only told one other person at school that I’m gay so I can’t exactly be mad at you for not telling anyone.” Cas knew that Bela had kept quiet because Dean had been listening in to conversations around school to see if anyone was talking about it.

“Are you sure?”

“Certain.” He reached up and stroked Dean’s cheek with his thumb before planting a kiss on it.

“Shall we do it today then? Become public?”

“I think we should. How do you want to do it?”

“We should do something subtle. Walk in holding hands, sit away from the rest of them at lunch, just the two of us.”

“Sounds perfect.” Cas kissed Dean’s cheek again and settled down for the rest of the journey to do, reaching across to put ‘Ramble On’ on.

~

When they entered the school, they did get a few obvious glances, but people weren’t looking at their interlinked fingers, they marvelling in the fact Cas was back. As a group of the ‘popular’ people rushed over to greet him, he dropped Dean’s hand and walked over to get engulfed in the swarm of his ‘friends’.

 _‘Well, that hurt.’_  Dean thought as he watched his boyfriend practically ignore him, hoping that he was at least in Cas’ thoughts.

After the crowd had died down a bit Dean called across to Cas. “Hey, English, let’s go!”

“Okie dokie.” Cas gave a loving smile and followed along. When Dean reached out his hand to take in Cas’, Cas put it in his jeans pocket and kept walking.

~

Due to all the time Cas had had off, they’d finished their first assignment and, whilst he wasn’t in a lesson, she’d set everyone another assignment. The two boys had managed to complete that one as well. Many people hadn’t finished, so the lesson was intended as a lesson working on the assignments. “Dude, we need to talk.” Dean turned to Cas.

“About what?”

“Not here. We need to get out of here.” Dean whispered as he slowly checked to see if anyone was listening.

“We’re in the middle of class, Dean. We can’t exactly get up and leave. We can talk at lunch.”

“It can’t wait that long. We NEED to talk.” Dean said with seriousness.

“Talk or  _talk_. I’m not doing that on school grounds, Dean.”

“How could you think I’d mean that? This is important. I’ll get us out of here. Just keep quiet, okay?” He raised his hand. Cas tried to pull it down but eventually gave in as the teacher approached. “Miss, Cas just said he felt a little light headed, is it okay if I take him out for some fresh air?”

“Does her really need your supervision, Mr Winchester?”

“The doctors did advise that for now he shouldn’t be left alone if he doesn’t feel well. I’m just obeying Doctors’ orders, Miss.”

“Okay. I trust you two have made sufficient progress with your assignment.”

“We’re done actually.”

“Fine, just don’t be too long and make sure you take him to the nurse if he gets any worse.”

“Will do, ma’am.” He said as he stood up and grabbed Cas’ arm to pull him up. “I told you I could get you out of here.” He whispered to his boyfriend.

“So, what is it we need to talk about that’s so important, Dean?” They headed for the bench just outside the school entrance.

“Us.”

“Us? What about us?”

“You're not really comfortable with me, are you?”

“What the hell? What’s changed between you picking me up this morning and right now?”

“It’s the way you’ve reacted to people seeing us together.” Dean said timidly.

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve refused to hold my hand since we arrived. You just seem a little uncomfortable around me. If you can’t be seen having contact with me, how am I supposed to believe you still love me if you can’t do this for me, Dude?”

“Dean, you called me dude. You don’t do that anymore. What happened to Baby and Gorgeous?”

“I’ll start calling you those when you become public with our relationship.”

“Why are you pushing this? You know I love you. Is that not enough?”

“I know you love me, I love you too but I’m pretty sure I love you more than you love me right now.”

“How dare you even say that?”

“I don’t want to believe it’s true but I just get that feeling.”

“Dean, remember when I first came out to you? When we were sat in the cafeteria?”

“Yes.”

“I said something along the lines of: I don’t know if they’ll accept me or exclude me. I don’t know if they will praise me or tease me. I don’t know if they’ll be scared of me or proud of me. I don’t think there is another gay guy in this school. If there is, he wouldn’t go for me anyway.”

“I remember. It gave me goosebumps. Oh, and you were COMPLETELY wrong on that last part.” He smiled for the first time since the conversation began.

“That still applies. I thought I could do it. I thought that I wouldn’t care what they think about me... but I do. I can’t help it.”

“Well, I thought you’d be able to do it with me by your side. You think this isn’t hard for me? I didn’t know I was gay until you came along. No one did. I figured that you’d be the stronger one in this situation and it’d be you that told everyone.”

“I’m sorry, Dean. I’m really, really sorry. Come one,” he stood up and reached out his had “let’s go back to class.” They held hands as they walked down the hall. Just as they were about to enter their classroom, Dean looked down, expecting Cas to let go. He didn’t.

The entered and sat down. Dean turned to Cas, placing his hand on his boyfriend’s knee. “You know they’re going to think we just left so we could fuck?”

“Yes I do. Let them.” He smiled. They spent the rest of the lesson making idle small talk and staring helplessly into each other’s eyes.

~

By the time lunch rolled around, they were pretty sure the whole school knew about their relationship. The two of them snuck off to the corner of the cafeteria and just sat, holding hands across the table. “They’re all staring, Dean.” Cas said cautiously.

“Let them, baby.” He smiled as Dean introduced ‘baby’ again. “We won’t go too far in front of them. We’ll stick with hand holding for now. No hugging and definitely no kissing. Let alone full on making out. We don’t want to flaunt our happiness and make them all TOO jealous, do we?”

Cas leant forwards and kissed Dean’s knuckles. “Okie dokie, handsome.”  

“Are you feeling okay?”

“I’m fine.”

“Are you SURE because I think you’re looking a little ill. Don’t you think we should get you home?” Dean winked at him boyfriend.

“No, I feel fine. Thank you for your concern.”

“Cas, take the hint.”

“OHHHH. Dean, I’m sorry but I can’t miss any more lessons. I’ve already missed too many.”

“Oh come on, Cas. You’ve already caught up with everything you’ve missed. You’re top of the class. I think you can afford to skip this afternoon. I can think of all sorts of dirty things I want to do to you.” He winked.

“Okay but let’s leave the cafeteria separately, not to be too obvious.” He stood up. “I’ll meet you at your car.” He gave a brief wave and scurried out.

“So, you’re fucking one of the most popular guys in school, Winchester?” Crowley and his “posse” arrived and sat down across from Dean.

“Why is that any of you business, Crowley? Just leave me and your cousin alone.” He stood up to leave.

“You off to go and meet him and fuck his brains out?”

“Grow up! That’s not where I’m going and that’s not what we do.”

“If you say so, Squirrel. Oh, by the way, when you two are together, who's the man and who's the woman?”

“It doesn’t work like that. Go to hell.” He gave a disapproving look and headed for his car.

~

“What’s wrong Dean?” Cas asked as Dean approached him.

“Nothing, Baby. Let’s go.”

“No, we’re not going anywhere until you tell me what’s happened.”

“Coming out. It’s just stressful. Crowley came over once you’d left and asked who the man and who the woman is when we fuck.”

“Take your own advice, Dean. We shouldn’t care what they think, remember?”

“I was okay with them thinking we’re dating. It’s when they think about what we do together that irritates me. Why would they care about our personal business?”

“They’re just doing it to irritate us. That’s exactly what it is: our PERSONAL business. If we don’t give them any details, they’ll get bored. I promise. Let’s go.” Dean opened the passenger door and let Cas get in before walking around the other side and climbed in himself.

~

They had decided to go to the lake house. Cas leant over and kissed Dean’s cheek before getting out of the car. Dean was still a little grumpy, but Cas knew just how to cheer him up... Doctor Sexy. He turned the TV on and sat on the sofa, Dean promptly resting his head on Cas’ lap and lying down to face the screen. Cas had recorded a ton of episodes in case of an emergency; Dean being grumpy counted as an emergency. As the show progressed, Cas could feel Dean to begin to relax. He looked down to check if his boyfriend had fallen asleep as his movements slowed. Instead he found Dean’s beautiful, green eyes staring up at him. He leant down to kiss his slightly parted lips. 

Dean sat up as he deepened the kiss. He turned around and straddled Castiel, kissing more and more passionately. He was becoming breathless by the time he managed to stop himself and mutter “shall we take this upstairs, Baby?” He only got a grunt of approval as Cas failed to produce any words.

Dean decided to recreate their first time together by carrying his boyfriend up the stairs. This time though, he did this in the form of a piggy back for practicality reasons. He twisted around and triggered a childish laugh from Cas as he dropped him on the bed. He quickly dove on top of him in a very feline way and devoured his mouth once again. “I’m sorry, Cas.”

“Sorry for what?”

“Sulking, getting embarrassed and giving a fuck about anyone but you. It won’t happen again.”

“You ARE allowed to give a fuck about others too, Dean.” Dean’s dick twitched as he heard Cas swear.

“I don’t need to give a crap about what others think of me. Just you.” Cas decided to kiss him instead of talk about it.

At this moment, they both had to decide how far they wanted this making out to go. “I know the perfect way to apologise.” Dean winked.

“You don’t need to apologise.”

Dean hummed in opposition. “Just lay back, relax and this is all for you.” Dean insisted. And who was Cas to refuse? It was going to be perfect. Of course, he’d sort Dean out once he was done but for now: pure Heaven. “Tell me if you want me to stop, okay?”

“Sure.” He reached up and tore Dean’s leather jacket off of him and proceeded to undo his belt. Dean quickly caught up and stripped Cas twice as fast as he was being stripped. They lay in just their boxers, kissing frantically. Cas moved his hands down to Dean’s butt, glancing down to find Batman boxers and nuzzling at his boyfriend’s neck. Pecking kisses along his collar.

“Hey, stop. This is for you, not me, capiche?”

“I capiche.” Cas nodded.

“Let’s get down to business then, baby. Say the word and we’ll stop.”

“Once again, to quote the love of my life: you’ve turned me on so much right now I might have to kill you.”

With that, Dean stripped off Cas’ boxers and moved his hand down to meet his boyfriend’s dick. He began with slow movements, making Cas release small sighs before speeding up and leaning back down to his mouth, kissing and stroking in time. Then he was ready to part his lips from Cas’ and move his head down.

“Dean...” came softly from Cas’ lips. Dean slid his nose down his boyfriend’s torso, just like he did during their first time. He carefully took the tip of the head of Cas’ dick into his mouth and circled it with his tongue. “DEAN!”

He took more in and started moving further down his shaft, slowly rising back up again. This wasn’t enough. He’d been too much of a dick to just end it with something they’d done a couple of times before. He pulled away and despite Cas’ initial complaint, leant over to his coat and took the lube he’d recently bought out of his pocket. When he next looked at his boyfriend, he couldn’t work out whether he looked excited or scared. “Don’t worry, I won’t go too far, baby steps.” He gave Cas a reassuring smile, squeezing his hand.

He squeezed a little lube onto his hand and covered his fingers. He gave Cas’ dick a quick stroke before slipping his hand backwards and tickling his boyfriend’s entrance and slipping his index finger in up to the knuckle.  _Oh GOD he’s so warm_.

“Deaannn... more!”

“Coming right up, Baby.” He verbalized as he slipped a second finger in and made the ‘come hither’ action with his fingers which had Cas’ hips bucking up. He used his clean hand to push his boyfriend’s hips down and then cupped the back of his neck to pull him up for a long, passionate kiss whilst prodding a third finger and putting pressure in that perfect spot.

“Oh crap... Dean I’m so..... I’m going to-“ Cas couldn’t actually form a sentence.

“Hold on a little longer, Baby. It’ll be worth it. I promise.” He pushed their foreheads together as he ended his sentence then crouched back over Cas’ crotch and took him into his mouth whilst fucking him with his fingers at the same time.  The noises Cas produced made Dean wonder if that was what Heaven’s like.

“Dean... can I-“

“Go for it, gorgeous.” He placed his lips back onto Cas’ dick and with one more lick up the vein at his base, Cas came squirting into his mouth. That noise... that noise that Cas climaxed with... Wasn’t even English.

“Wow. Just... wow. Thank you, Dean.”

“HEY! No thanking me! It’s my job and thankfully it’d appear I’m reasonably good at it.”

“Reasonably good? Dean, I’ve never felt so much joy, so much love, and so damn good. You’re tons better than ‘reasonably good’. You’re so far past reasonably good that you can’t even see it anymore.” Cas was too blissed out to continue. “I just can’t, Dean. It’s not possible to verbalise how happy you make me.” They kissed briefly.  “And also how sleepy you’ve made me.”

“Thank you, Beautiful. Why don’t you get some sleep?”

“No, it’s your turn. Roll over!” Cas ordered, without the energy to actually move to roll his boyfriend over.

“Nah, you’re alright. You’re no use to me in this state. Plus, I said this was for you.” He did his best to think unsexy thoughts. “You’ll have to excuse me.” He stood up to head for the bathroom as Cas grabbed his hand and pulled him back on top of him.

“I can do this.”

“No. No, you can’t. That’s fine. I can sort myself out. Mind if I take a shower?”

“You know... I don’t need energy for you to... fuck my face.”

Dean sighed. “That’s not fair; you know I get turned on when you swear. It’s fine, maybe some other time. Baby steps, remember?”

“It’s not too dissimilar to what we’ve done before. Come on. Do it for me?”

“You know I’d do anything for you. Please don’t say that. Perhaps we could do it later or tomorrow. Maybe we’ll go on another date on Friday and we’ll do that then. For now, do you mind if I take a shower?”

“Do you mind if I join you?” Cas winked.

“Do you mind if I rock your world again?”

“Do you mind if I rock yours too?”

“I’ll consider it. Come on, stud.” He pulled up his boyfriend from his semi-comatose state.

Dean set the shower running, whilst still supporting Cas’ weight and wrapped his hand around the back of his boyfriend’s neck to draw him in for another kiss. He stepped under the water flow and ran his fingers up and down Cas’ sides seductively.

When he knew Cas was able to hold his own weight again, he let go. “Ready to go again?”

“Yes.” was all he could get by way of a response.

“Bring it on.” He winked. He reached down and fondled his boyfriend’s balls, resulting in a full body shiver. He proceeded to shift to a crouching position on the shower floor and lick his lips as he stared at what was about to be inside him. Like a pro, he took Cas’ dick into his mouth and sucked hard. He’d taken note of everything Cas liked. He repeated licking that particular spot the made Cas writhe with pleasure, slowly taking in more and more of his boyfriend’s penis and listening to the glorious groans. This went on for a few minutes and Cas became less and less stable to the point Dean was trying to hold him up and trying suck him off at the same time. He reached down to his own crotch and began slowly stroking.

“Dean, Dean, Dean. Dean. OHMYGOD DEAN!” He climaxed faster that Dean was expecting and fell boneless to the ground, on top of Dean. “That one.... That’s one was the best damn orgasm of my life. All things considered, there are only 4 others to compare it with but... wow.”

Dean wiped the splashes of come from the corners of his mouth and reached up to turn the water off. “Glad I did my job right.” He dove in for a kiss.

“It’s definitely your turn now.”

“Nope, this was your night. Plus, I came whilst you did.”

Cas perked up. “Really?”

“Yeah, there’s a hell of a nice view from down here. It’s beautiful. Tastes pretty good too.” He winked.

“We should probably move.” Cas tried to get up but couldn’t. Dean rose and pulled him up, wrapping him in the only towel he could find; deciding the only way that HE’D be able to get dry was rubbing against Cas.   _What a shame._

Cas opened up the towel to allow Dean to slide in with him.

“Tell me when you’re ready to go again. I’ve had a brilliant idea.” He cuddled up to his boyfriend in the single towel and waddled sideways to the bed, falling on top of its gorgeous owner.

“What is it?”

“You’ll have to wait and see. I need you turned on again first though so come here and kiss me.” They made out for a while, just long enough that Dean was satisfied that Cas was hard enough. “Okay, just move over here.” He guided him to the centre of the bed. “So, we can do this one of two ways. Due to the fact you’re pretty much still out of it, I’ll do all the work. Just lay perfectly still. Got that?”

Cas nodded. He started to panic.  _Dean means sex... should I stop him? I should stop him. I don’t want to stop him. I want him inside me. No, I don’t. I want to wait._

Dean didn’t give Cas a chance to articulate any of his thoughts though. He dropped the towel on the floor, giving up on the idea that they’d successfully get dry. He levered himself on top of his boyfriend, making sure Cas’ dick was between his legs. He clenched his thighs around his boyfriend’s beautiful private area, seen only by him, and began to do what appeared to be push ups. At first, Cas was confused, he then realised the pleasure spreading around his groin. Dean was making him fuck between his legs and it felt so good. He hips bucked up to meet Dean’s beat, which made it even better.

Dean placed a quick kiss on his boyfriend’s forehead and kept the steady rhythm, though running desperately out of breath. Cas was chanting his name, so there was no way in hell he could stop. “DEAN!” He kept moving, pushing his boyfriend’s hips down and moving more.  It was a good job that they were still a little wet from the shower; Dean didn’t like the idea of dry humping.

A huge groan left Cas.

“My work here is complete.” Dean laughed.

It took a while for Cas to gain enough energy to speak again. “You’ve once again made me speechless, Dean.”

“Good. I’d be a shitty boyfriend if I wasn’t good in bed.”

“It doesn’t take being good in bed to be a good boyfriend. It’s just a bonus.” Cas winked. “How did I get so lucky? I have a boyfriend who is funny, kind, handsome, sporty, sexy, childish, smart, and a sex god. Am I dreaming?”

“I don’t take complements well, Cas. I hope you’re not dreaming, then I wouldn’t actually be sucking you off and that’d be great shame. Although, if you WERE dreaming, it’d be nice to know you dream of doing this with me.”

“To be honest, most of my dreams involve you. And only a few of them involve me killing you, so that’s a good thing.” Cas joked and got a punch on the arm from his boyfriend in return. After a few moments of silence Cas piped up. “Erm, Dean?”

“Yes.”

“You bought lube?” He asked timidly.

“Yeah, is that a bad thing? I’m sorry if it feels like I’m pushing you.”

“No, it’s fine. I just felt a little intimidated. I’m not sure I’m ready for that yet.”

“I didn’t buy it with that in mind. Well, I kinda did, as the end game. I bought it because I thought I’d need to be prepared. Plus, I was online the other day and looked at the joy on this guy’s face when his boyfriend did to him what I did to you.”

“You watched porn?”

“Well, yeah.” he quietly admitted. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. I guess I should be sorry.”

“Why, baby?”

“If I ‘helped’ more, you wouldn’t need to please yourself.”

“NO! That’s not the primary reason I watch. Yes, it’s nice to get off to it but the main reason is to see what makes the average man tick and think of new things I want to do to you and the best ways to make you writhe in pleasure beside me.”

“Oh, okay.” Cas accepted Dean’s reasoning but still felt slightly offended that Dean could get off over somebody that wasn’t him.

“Why don’t you get some sleep? There are very few things in the world that make me happier than falling asleep next to you. ”

Despite the fact it was still mid-afternoon; Dean received a hum of approval as his boyfriend rolled over and rested his head on his chest, stroking his six pack. They dosed for a few hours.

~

When Dean awoke Cas was nowhere to be seen. I could feel a hard mess on his stomach and between his legs from Cas’ come so opted for a shower before going to find his boyfriend.

Once he was out of the shower, he simply pulled on his boxers and wandered downstairs. “Cas?” There was no response. “Baby?”

“Hello, Dean.” Dean jumped as he heard a familiar voice.

“Balthazar? What the hell are you doing here?”

“I have a few days off, figured I’d come and check on Cassie. I didn’t expect to find you here too.”

“Yeah, he came back to school this morning but we escaped at lunch.”

“You had better things to do, I’m guessing? My little brother is very lucky, isn’t he?” Dean noticed Balthazar glance down and suddenly realised he was wearing only his boxers. He covered his crotch. “Batman, really? How old are you? 4? Couldn’t you have at least put something sexy on, for Cas?”

“Shut up, he likes them. But that’s not the important thing right now.”

“So what is the important thing, Dean?”

“I’m going to get dressed and then we’ll talk.”

“Okie dokie. I’ll be waiting, Deano.”

Dean ran back up the stairs and pulled on his clothes from earlier. When he went back downstairs there was the obvious smell on cherry pie in the air and Dean’s face lit up. “You know it could never match the standards of my mum’s, right?” Dean walked straight past Balthazar and placed his hands on his boyfriend’s hips, leaning his chin on his shoulder.

“I figured there was no harm in trying.” Cas turned around and kissed Dean’s cheek. Balthazar cleared his throat. “Sorry Balth.”

“It’s fine. I’m just glad you’re both happy. So, Dean, what was it you wanted to talk about. We should leave Cassie to it, he’ll finish faster and we can eat. I’m starving and I bet you’re post sex hungry.” Balthazar winked.

They had already entered the living room when Dean said “We weren’t...”

“I know you were, Deano. I could hear you.” Dean’s cheeks began to glow as red as cherries through embarrassment. “It doesn’t matter. Gabriel’s done a lot worse.” Dean cringed at the thought of what could be worse than hearing people humping. “So, what do you want to say to me?”

“It’s nothing vital. I just wanted you to know that I’m totally serious about Cas.”

“I know. He told me you told him you love him. It’s sweet. I’ve never seen him happier that when he was telling me about how your relationship has advanced.”

“Not too graphic, I hope.”

“A little but I don’t mind. Gabe once described to me exactly how he’d banged a chick, in waaaay too much detail. It’s not something you want to hear you little brother explain.”

“So, you don’t hold a grudge against me in any way?”

“Why would I? Cas is happy so I’m happy. Cas likes you, so I like you. It’s how it works, Winchester. I’m sure you’re the same with Sammy.”

“I am. I understand. Thank you.”

“No need to thank me. It’s not like you need my consent to bang my little brother.”

“I know but I figured you’re like Cas’ role model so being straight with YOU is the best way to keep Cas with ME for good.”

“He wants you, Dean. Even if you weren’t honest with me, he’d be with you. He loves you too much to leave you now or ever. Just remember: break his heart and I’ll break your-“

“-neck? Yeah, I understood that the first three times you told me. I don’t plan to break his heart. You really think he’d want to be with me forever?”

“I know my brother. I can read him like a book. His thoughts and feelings are so obviously printed on his face, just like our mother. He’s completely and utterly in love with you. I guarantee it. Wait! Do you not want him to be with you forever?”

“Of course I do. I just think, realistically, I shouldn’t get my hopes up, right? High school romances rarely last after high school is over. Or I’ll completely and utterly screw things up and he’ll leave me before we graduate.”

“There are always exceptions, Dean. Just think of Marshall and Lily or Haley and Nathan.”

“Dude, you watch One Tree Hill?”

“So what if I do? It’s a quality show and you know it.”

“If you say so. You really think we could be an exception?”

“I do. You better believe it yourself for it to work though. Do it for Castiel if you’re not doing it for yourself.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Just be careful with him, okay? He’s let you into his life, don’t take advantage of him. He can be quite vulnerable.”

“No he can’t.” They heard Cas chime up behind them.

“Hey. His words, not mine.” Dean raised his hands in surrender after pointing to Balthazar.

“You two have no right to be talking about me.”

“I was just warning Dean about the fact I’m a protective big brother.”

“I can look after myself.”

“We know. But that’s not the point.” Dean reassured.

“What is the point then?”

“I...” Dean stuttered “I want to be the one to take care of you and, as your father figure, I guess this was me asking Balthazar to leave you for me. If that makes sense to you?”

“I’m not sure it does, Dean.”

“I just wanted his permission really. I wanted his approval of me being with you.”

“Okay but how does that explain that fact you described me as vulnerable?”

Balthazar cut Dean off. “I described you like that because I think you can be too trusting. I know it doesn’t happen frequently but I don’t want what happened with April to happen again.”

Dean butted in. “I don’t plan to take advantage of him like that?” He raised his voice.

“Oh, that’s not what I meant. I meant the self-pity afterwards.”

“I think he had a right to feel sorry for himself.” He voice was louder still.

“I know. I know. FYI, I like this Dean. The Dean who gets protective about his boyfriend. I approve.”

“That’s good to know. Do you accept this as a reasonable explanation, Cas?”

“I guess so.” He moved over and sat sideways on his boyfriend’s knee. “The pie’s ready.” He kissed Dean's cheek.

“and it smells delicious.” Dean added and he pushed Cas off of him and ran to the kitchen.


	12. ♫ I can be your hero, baby. ♫

(LET’S SKIP TO CHRISTMAS)

“So what are you getting Cas for Christmas?” Jo asked Dean. They were laying on Jo’s bed.

“I don’t know. I really don’t know. I don’t know how much I’m expected to spend on him. I’ve never bought anyone other than my family and you a present before. I’m new to the whole ‘gift buying’ thing.”

“You’ve really never bought anyone else a present?” Jo gasped.

“Really. I’ve never been with someone long enough to spend a special occasion with them. Well, I’ve been with a few girls on their birthday but I hadn’t known them previously. I just picked them up in a bar on their birthday.”

“Dean. You’ve pretty much been with Cas since you moved here, right? So I’m guessing you haven’t been to a bar to pick up a girl... or boy since you moved. You were SEVENTEEN at the oldest, Dean. Isn’t that a bit too young to be doing that?”

“Oh, come on, Jo. You know I was dick before and you were one of the few people who saw that and managed to look past all of my BS anyway but it doesn’t change the fact I would have done anything to get laid. But I’m not like that now. You’re right, since I moved here in the summer, I haven’t been with anyone but Cas.  He’s special.”

“When you say ‘been with’ do you mean been on a date with or been with?”

“Both.” Dean admitted.

“Brilliant.” Jo smiled. “I finally got you to tell be something about your sex life. For a previous man slut, you’re sure as hell good at keeping your secrets in the bedroom to yourself.” She laughed. “So, how far have you and Cas gone? Have you rammed home yet?”

“Ergh, Jo, just drop it and help me pick him a present.” He grabbed her laptop and was amused when he noticed her wallpaper was a group shot of him, Jo, Cas, Benny and Becky and Chuck’s 18th birthday party. “That was a good day.” He smiled.

She pulled it back and walked over to her desk. “Okay. So do you want to go with practical or fun?”

“Erm, I don’t know.”

“Oh Dean. When he opens it, what reaction do you want to get? Would you prefer it if he wanted to hug or if he dragged you to bedroom?”

“Erm, I don’t know.”

“Dean... are you going soft? The Dean Winchester I used to know would have said bedroom without having to actually think. You’re actually willing to stick with a hug?”

“So what if I am? I love him, Jo. I don’t care.”

“Wow. Okay, if you want to stick to a hug, I’m guessing you don’t want to get anything to play with in the bedroom.”

Dean hit her playfully over the head with a pillow. “Correct.”

“Good, I don’t want you messing up my internet history with your kinkiness, Winchester.”

He smiled. “Oh, come on. Control, shift, n. Everyone knows that’s how you keep your history clean. I’ll just go to the adult store to sort that part of the gift out.” When she gave him a disgusted look he added, “I WAS JOKING!”

“Okay. So, practical or fun?”

“Erm, bit of both maybe.”

“Okay. So what should be make your budget?”

“Cas is loaded, he’ll spend too much. I can’t afford a lot.”

“I could talk to him, subtly of course, and find out how much he plans to spend.”

“You better make it very subtle, Joanna Beth.”

“Don’t full name me Dean Michael Winchester!” She mocked. “Now, get out of here. Go and pick your boyfriend up and save him from Chuck. Bring him over at 8pm and invite everyone else. We’re having a Christmas party.”

“Jo, it’s only the 5th of December. Why are we having a party?”

“We’ll have another one closer to Christmas itself but I need to talk to Cas.”

“Fine. See you later.”

~

“Dean, why are we having a party 20 days before Christmas?” They were walking from the impala, towards the Harvell’s home.

“Well, Jo’s always been very festive and excitable. There’s nothing wrong with relaxing on a Friday night, is there?”

“No. I guess it’s just bringing back bad memories.”

“Well, you’re sticking to lemonade tonight. It’s an order.” Dean stopped his boyfriend just before they got to the front door and grabbed both of his hands. “Promise me you’ll steer clear of alcohol. I can’t bear the thought of seeing you passed out again. Please.”

“I promise. Although, I DO like it when you take care of me.” Cas smiled.

“Well, I can take care of you when you’re healthy too. I’ll show you in bed tonight.” He winked.

“We have a deal. But you can’t get too drunk either.”

“I’m not going to be touching anything alcoholic. I’m driving and I want to get you home in one piece.”

“You could let ME drive. You told me you’d let me take the impala for a spin at some point.” Cas made his cutest puppy dog eyes.

“Don’t look at me like that, baby. You know I struggle to resist your beautiful blue pools. I think it’s best to let you take her for a spin when it’s light. We can go for a long drive tomorrow if you want.”

“Fine.”

Dean pulled Cas in for, what was intended to be, a long, hot kiss. However, Charlie interrupted. “Ew, get a room, Bitches!”

“Drunk already, Charlie?” Dean shouted.

“How dare you accsc... accu... suggest that I’m drunk by 8pm. Just come inside. Jo is looking for you, Casssssie.” She walked off.

“I hate being called Cassie.” Cas muttered, walking towards the door.

“I know. Just humour her.”

“Why do you think Jo wants me?”

“Haven’t a clue. If she starts interrogating you feel free to leave. She may be my best friend but I’d quite happily dump her for you.” Dean stuck his tongue out. He waited a second. “I feel bad for saying she’s my best friend. I have you now.” He stopped Cas walking and turned to face him again.

“It’s okay. I’m aware Jo was your best friend before you met me so I’m not going to complain because you just stated she’s still your best friend. Nothing has changed between the two of you. I’m lucky enough to be your boyfriend. I don’t need to be your best friend too.”

“Will you settle with joint best friend?”

“I will.” Cas pulled him towards the door. “I better go and find Jo. I’ll come and see you later.” He gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and pushed him away.

~

“Jo?” Cas found her.

“Cas. Hi.”

“Hello. Charlie said you were looking for me.”

“Yes. I was wondering if you knew what you were getting Dean for Christmas. I figured I’d be the best person for you to ask if you needed help.”

“I haven’t a clue. I was hoping I could get him to say something and hint to me what he wanted but he hasn’t. After Sam, you’re the one closest to him so you should know what he wants.”

“You’re kidding me, right? Cas, you’re the one he’s closest to. I’m not sure he could function without you. I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t even need a present to be happy.”

“That doesn’t really help me, Jo. What do you think he wants?”

“Well, what’s your price limit?”

“I don’t really have one. I have enough money to buy pretty much anything he’d want. Do you know how much he has spent on me?”

“He hasn’t bought anything yet. I’ve had a similar conversation with him.”

“So this is actually just you being his spy for him and finding out how much he should spend on me?”

“Well, yes. But that’s not the sole reason. I also want my best friend’s boyfriend to be in my best friend’s good books.” 

“Okay. So get me in them. What should I buy him?”

“What do you like most about him?”

“I don’t know where to start.”

“Other than his personality. What objects of his do you like the most?”

“This is going to seem really cheesy and you please don’t tell him I told you he has them but... his superhero underwear.”

“HE HAS SUPERHERO BOXERS? Oh, that is brilliant.” Cas raised his eyebrows. “Fine, my lips are zipped.”

“But he already has that so that doesn’t really help me with his Christmas gift.”

“Okay, I can’t believe I’m about to ask about things that touch my best friend’s crotch but... are there any superheroes he doesn’t have?”

“Green Lantern, but he hates Green Lantern.” He thought for a second. “IRON MAN. He doesn’t have Iron man ones. I remember him saying he couldn’t find any.”

“Follow me.” Jo pulled Cas into her bedroom. “Let me turn my laptop on and we’ll do some Googling. I’m sure he just hasn’t looked hard enough.”

“Thanks for helping.”

“Anything to make my Dean happy.” After a few moments she added, “And YOU do, Cas. He’s the happiest I’ve ever seen him since he started dating you. Thank you for that.” Once she realised she adopted her (as Dean called it) ‘chick flick’ voice, needed to macho up – Jo definitely wasn’t a girly girl- so she prodded him and said, “Yeah, thanks for stealing my best friend from me, Jerk.” But smiled so Cas knew she was just messing around.

“I’ve not stolen him, Jo, and I don’t plan on taking him away from you. I promise.” Although he knew Jo had been joking, his answer was very sincere. 

“Thanks, Cas.” She swiped her finger along the fingerprint reader and unlocked her laptop. “Okay, Ironman boxers here we come. Oh, I’m picking underwear for my best friend, this is a low moment.” They laughed as she scrolled though Cafepress.com under the Ironman tag. “Boom! I’ve found some. I’m not going to ask how big he is. That’s not something I want to picture right now. In the past, yes.“ She stuck her tongue out playfully.

“You mean you and Dean used to-“ Cas sighed. He didn’t like the idea of Dean being best friends with an ex-girlfriend.

“Oh, Hell no!”

“Good.” Cas smiled.

“But I’ll let you in on a little secret of mine, Cas. You have to promise not to tell Dean because I don’t want awkwardness.”

“I won’t tell him.”

“Back when we were freshman I had a HUGE crush on him.” Her cheeks went bright red immediately. “I shouldn’t have told you that.”

Cas just laughed. “As long as you don’t plan on stealing him from me, I don’t think I’ll have a problem with that.”

“I don’t. The crush only lasted a few months because I realised he didn’t really look past a girls boobs and I didn’t want that. I don’t know what you’ve done but you’ve changed him for the better, Cas. If you ever break up and he ends up actually being straight, I’m pretty sure I’d be attracted to him again. But I don’t see that ever happening. He’s in it for the long run, you know?”

“I know.” Cas smiled to himself. He’d managed to get an extremely hot guy to fall for him and this extremely hot guy was in love with him and planned to be in love with him forever. It was a truly heart warming feeling.

“Anyway, add these to basket and do some more searching around. I’m sure he’ll love this site. I’ve spent so much money on it, it’s got EVERYTHING a fangirl - or in his case, fanman - needs. Just don’t spend too much on him. You have more money than he does and he doesn’t want to feel pressured. I’m guessing you have your wallet with you so feel free to order whatever it is you find and just shut my laptop down when you’re done.”

“Thanks, Jo. You’re great at this. See you in a bit.” She gave a quick salute and headed out of her bedroom.

~

Cas had finished and paid and was happy with what he’d bought for his first Christmas in a relationship. He ventured downstairs.

“Saw you sneaking up to Jo’s room, Cassie. Is there something Dean should know about?” He turned around to see Bela.

“No, Dean’s fine.”

“So, you’re trying to keep your affair a secret? I can’t promise I’ll keep it in.” Bela teased.

“Unbelievable.” He muttered under his breath. “What happened to nice, ‘I can keep a secret’ Bela from my birthday party?”

“That Bela is dead and buried. I killed her when I realised that a couple of hot guys would rather be with each other than with me.”

“Sorry to disappoint you but neither of us are going to change our minds. I’m definitely in this for the long run.” He glanced up to Dean, who was sat in the corner talking to Benny and Chuck, and smiled, catching his gaze. “Bye, Bela.” He walked over to his boyfriend.

“Hey, Cas.” Benny yelled as he approached the other three guys.

“Hi.” Cas replied. “Hey.” He added to Dean and he went and sat sideways on his knee.

“What did Jo want?”

“That’s none of your business.”

“That’s none of my business.” Dean parroted. “My boyfriend and my best friend sneak off and I don’t get to know why.” He turned to Chuck and Benny. “Do you guys know what’s going on?”

“Not a clue, brother.” Benny answered.

“I’m going to get the truth out of you Cas. Whatever it takes, I’ll do it.” Dean chuckled.

“That’s not going to work. I’ll take it to my grave.” He spotted Jo across the room and gave her a quick nod.

Dean was about to say something again when the music cut out. Everyone looked over to the large speaker in the corner. Bela stood up on the table and yelled “listen up everybody! I have some news regarding a recent talking point amongst us all.” She was quite clearly drunk.

“Take your top off!” an equally drunk guy shouted. In return she lifted up her t-shirt and shamelessly displayed her boobs for a moment.

“My news involves the famous Castiel Novak and Dean Winchester.” She gestured over to Cas sat on Dean’s knee. Everyone had got over the fact there was a gay couple in the school and no one reacted when they saw them hug or kiss in the corridors. It had all blown over. That was up until Bela decided to stand and announce... something... about their relationship. They just looked at each other, puzzled.

“Is there a problem?” Dean shouted.

“No, there’s not a problem for US, really. It’s a problem for YOU Dean.”

“Oh, really?” Dean didn’t look amused. “and who has caused this problem?” He humoured her.

“Your boyfriend has caused this problem.”

Dean looked to Cas. Cas shrugged. “and the problem is what?”

“Cas, do you want to tell him or should I?”

“What am I supposed to be telling him?” Cas asked.

“I’ll do it for you, Cassie. Dean, your lovely boyfriend here is cheating on you.”

“Oh really?” It was obvious Dean didn’t believe her crap. “With who?”

“Here’s the even bigger kick in the ass. It’s your best friend.”

“You really think that’d happen, Bela? I think I know them well enough to know they wouldn’t do that. I think you should shut up.”

“Do you really believe they haven’t done anything, Dean? I mean, you can’t pretend that you didn’t notice them sneak into Jo’s room.”

“I did notice that, yes. In your world, talking alone may be the same as fucking but that’s not how it happens in the real world. And it’s definitely not how it happens in my world or Cas’ world. I have also noticed that someone here hasn’t got over the fact that I have something they want. That‘s the real reason behind the public display, isn’t it? You want Cas. You’ve wanted him for a while now, since before our relationship began. And I can’t blame you for that. He’s gorgeous. And you can’t handle the fact he’d want me more than you. Don’t worry darling, it’s only blatantly obvious to everyone here. So, why don’t you climb down off the table, straighten yourself up and leave. It’ll be less embarrassing for you.” Cas had cuddled up closer to Dean, loving the protective arm around him and the relief that Dean didn’t believe any of Bela’s bullshit.

“I don’t... I just... I didn’t... ERGH! Gay guys!” She groaned as she climbed off the table and ran out the door to the sound of people cheering Dean.

“Wow. That was intense.” Dean turned to Cas.

“Please say you don’t believe her.” Cas begged.

“Of course I don’t believe her. I trust both of you too much to think for a second that you’d betray me like that.”

Cas sighed with relief and whispered. “I love you too much to cheat on you.”

The Bible says:  _The man who commits adultery is an utter fool, for he destroys his own soul._

“That’s good, because I love you too.” Dean said, equally quietly.

“So, what WERE you doing in Jo’s room?” Chuck asked.

“That doesn’t matter.” Dean confirmed, gazing into his boyfriend’s dazzling eyes. He knew what they were talking about anyway.

“We were picking your Christmas present, Dean.” Jo approached. “Sorry Cas, I know we agreed to keep it secret but I don’t want anyone thinking I’d pull you away from your boyfriend. We were discussing what to get you for Christmas.” Jo turned around to the crowd staring at them. “There’s nothing wrong with that, is there?”

People realised there was no longer anything interesting to stare at and someone turned the music back on. Their attention was taken away for the couple and back to the dancing and drinking.

“You better both give me a kickass present after that palaver.”

“You can count on it.” Cas kissed him. Jo walked off to Becky, in desperate need of a drink. “Alcohol would be great right now, Dean.” Cas pointed out.

“No way in Hell. You’re sober for life, Castiel Novak.” He looked around. All attention had been taken away from them. “Do you want to get out of here?” Cas didn’t need asking twice. He stood up and grabbed Dean’s hand.

“Bye, guys. See you on Monday.” Cas bid Chuck and Benny farewell. He pulled Dean towards the table of drinks.

“I said no alcohol.”

“We’re not here for the alcohol. We’re here to say goodbye and sorry to Jo and then we’re going to the lake house.” They did exactly that. A quick apology to Jo and they climbed into the impala.

~

Cas was expecting Dean to ferociously kiss him as soon as they got to the Lake House but he didn’t. He simply held his hand, wordless, as they walked up to Cas’  _(their)_ room. He pulled off his top and jeans and climbed under the covers. “Are you going to get in here or what? It’s cold without you.” He looked up at his boyfriend who proceeded to pull off his own clothes and climb under the covers. They cuddled up. That was it. No kissing, just cuddling.

“Is everything okay, Dean?”

“Yeah, Baby. Why do you ask?”

“I was just wondering why we aren’t kissing right now.”

“I just wanted to feel you next to be for a while. I feel like I’ve embarrassed myself tonight.”

“You haven’t. Bela has. And everyone knows that. You’ve just shown your possessiveness,” he curled up tighter, “and I think it’s a huge turn on.” He leapt up to kiss his boyfriend, only to be declined entry into his mouth by his stern closed lips. “I’m beginning to feel like I’ve done something wrong. You’d tell me if I’d done something, right?”

“You haven’t done anything wrong. I love you just as much as always. I just feel like talking instead of kissing. Is that okay?”

“Yes. What do you want to talk about?”

“I have an idea. Something I’ve been trying to postpone.”

“What? What is it? Is something wrong?”

“No, nothing’s wrong. It’s the exact opposite. Actually, that was a stupid thing to say. It’s not the opposite. It’s just not... okay; I’ll just cut to the chase.” He took a deep breath. “You’ve met my mum and Sammy and that’s great. They love you and it’s really great. But I’ve met the whole of your family and extended family. I feel like I need to let you into my life more.”

“Okay. What are you planning, Dean?”

“I figured I’d introduce you to MY extended family. You’ve met Ellen and Jo, they’re family, but that’s not enough. I feel I need to introduce you to everyone. Unless that’d make you feel uncomfortable.”

“Of course it doesn’t. What were you thinking of doing? Christmas family party or something?”

“Yeah. Are you sure you’re okay with this?”

“Why wouldn’t I be? I plan on being in your life for a while, Dean. I’m going to have to meet everyone eventually.”

“Good. I’ll be spending Christmas day back in Wichita but we could go across on the 22nd or 23rd and I can drive you home on Christmas Eve when I come to pick Jo and Ellen up to take them across. It’s only about a 2 and a half hour drive. I don’t want you to feel like I’m pressuring you.”

“Dean.” Cas kissed his cheek. “That sounds perfect. Now you need to kiss me until I’m breathless.”

They kissed and kissed and kissed. Cas broke it apart and rested his head back on Dean’s chest. “All day long I waited for this. The way you say goodnight with a passionate kiss. A kiss that drives away any thoughts of sleep. And tells me your love is mine to keep”

“Why do I get the feeling you just quoted and they aren’t your own words?”

“Goodnight kisses passionate or mild. Any one of yours can drive me wild. My fatigue is replaced by wakefulness. When your lips touch mine in a goodnight kiss” Cas continued.

Dean leant down and kissed the top of his boyfriend’s head waiting for Cas to carry on. “I’d keep going but I’d feel like you’d think I was trying to hint at something and it’d freak you out.”

“Just tell me the whole thing. I’ll bear in mind you’re not hinting. Just, send me to sleep.”

_“All day long I waited for this_

_The way you say goodnight with a passionate kiss_

_A kiss that drives away any thoughts of sleep_

_And tells me your love is mine to keep_

_Goodnight kisses passionate or mild_

_Any one of yours can drive me wild_

_My fatigue is replaced by wakefulness_

_When your lips touch mine in a goodnight kiss_

_Arms around each other_

_Lying in bed_

_The children are sleeping_

_The cat's been fed_

_Kissing and caressing like every other night_

_Your goodnight kisses just feel so right_

_In my sleep I dream of your kiss_

_How our lips together brings such bliss_

_And I know that there's no better way_

_Than a goodnight kiss to end the day”_

 

“It’s beautiful, Baby. I’m guessing you were referring to the children when you said you didn’t want to freak me out.”

“Yes. I didn’t want you to think I was suggesting we have children. That’s a ridiculous thing to talk about, even THINK about, after less than 3 months of dating. I promise that’s not what I meant by the poem.”

“I know.” He kissed Cas‘ head again. “And, hey, maybe we WILL have children one day.”

“You think?”

“I don’t know. I’m not a huge fan of kids but if, in the future, you decide you want one or two or even three, then so will I.”

“You’re perfect, Dean Winchester. I don’t know if I will, but it’s nice to know that, if I do, you’ll be okay with that. How about we confirm we’ll have a pet? Not a cat, like in the poem, I want a dog. I’m a dog person.” He looked up to check Dean was taking it in his stride. “How about you? Are you a cat or dog person?”

“Dogs, I love dogs. We’ll have at least one dog. I’m thinking we should get a black Labrador.”

“I like the sound of that. What should we call it?”

“Nick.”

“Nick?”

“Yes, Nick. I want to name him after Nick Fury.”

“What if it’s a girl? Natasha?”

“After Black Widow? I like your way of thinking, Cas.”

“You better like it. You’re stuck with it.”

“I’m lucky that it’s you and Nick or Natasha that I’m stuck with. I think we’ll have a happy life together, do you?”

A kiss was all the conformation Dean needed to know Cas agreed. “It’ll be a great life. I can’t wait. Does it scare you that we’re making plans and we’ve not even been dating for 3 months?”

“It scares me a little but all I need to do is look at how happy you make me and I realise that I can’t wait. Just remember how early on I told you I love you. It could quite easily have been a Ted moment but in the end he got Robin anyway. The way I see it, whatever I do, it’ll always lead me to you and us.”

“You just likened out relationship to How I Met Your Mother. That’s very romantic of you.” He teased. “I think I’d prefer our relationship to be more like Marshall and Lily’s though.”

“I’d love it if it was like Marshall and Lily’s. Together forever sounds good. Just don’t run off to San Francisco and leave me.”

“I won’t. I promise. You’re once again likening me to the girl in our relationship, Dean.”

“I know. I’m sorry. I promise I won’t run off to San Francisco either. Is that any better?”

“Yes, it is. Goodnight, Handsome.”

“Goodnight, Beautiful. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

~

“So what are you getting Cas for Christmas?” Jo asked Dean. They were laying on Jo’s bed again.

Dean sighed. “I still have no clue.”

“Dean, you’re down to 18 days until Christmas. You need to pick something.”

“What has he got for me?”

“Confidential.”

“Oh, come on. At least tell me how much he’s spent.” Dean begged.

“Fine. He didn’t shut my laptop down like I asked him to so his cart was still open when I came up.”

“He’s ordered something online?”

“Yeah. You can find anything online. As soon as he had a vague idea I knew exactly where to look. Anyway, he left his cart open. He spent around $30.”

“Okay. I can definitely stretch that far. What do you think he wants?”

“What’s your favourite thing about him? Other than his personality, what objects of his do you like the most?” Jo thought back to using these exact words with Cas.

“Erm. I don’t know.”

“Dean, do you know your boyfriend AT ALL?”

“Of course I do. I just know about his feelings, we don’t really pay attention to objects.”

“Okay. What’s his favourite thing?”

“Is it too self centred to say... me?”

“No, it isn’t. That’s believable. So, what’s his favourite thing about you?”

“Well,” he winked, “he’s quite fond of my-“

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence, Dean Michael Winchester!”

“Okay, okay! Well, there is something but I don’t really want to share what that is. You’ll probably never let me live it down.”

“Oh, come on Winchester. If you can’t tell ME something, who can you tell?”

“Cas. Cas knows everything. Only him, mum and Sammy know about this though.”

“Just spit it out.”

“Okay. I have lots of superhero underwear.”

Jo laughed, trying to pretend she didn’t already know. “Wow. Okay. I’m not sure how to use that information. So, he likes that about you... do you think he’d want some? Although that might be quite hard to work out whose is whose after sex.”

Dean sniggered. “You think it’d really matter if we managed to switch underwear? I’m pretty sure my crotch touching something his crotch has touched isn’t a big deal, considering my mouth has touched it directly... a lot.”

Jo made retching noises. “Ew. T.M.I! Okay. Why don’t you think about getting him some then? However, that’s not going to cost $30. What else does he like?”

“Well, he likes superhero movies now. He used to like these crappy old English ones, like when Sean Connery was Bond and not Daniel Craig. Maybe I should get him something like that. If I suffer through one of those, it’d definitely show him I love him.”

“Okay.” She turned to her laptop. “We’ll start with the boxers.” She opened Cafepress and searched the exact same words she had done when she helped Cas. “Take your pick and add them to basket.”

Dean scrolled through and added some Thor, Captain America and Ironman boxers to basket. “I love this site.”

“I thought you would. I’ve spent so much money on here. So, are you done? You can’t buy DVDs on there.”

“I think I’ll look around a bit more. Even with a couple of DVDs as well I won’t have spent enough. Maybe I should get some more superhero merchandise. Thor’s his favourite and can you blame him? Chris Hemsworth is the most attractive man to live. Well, he thinks Jensen Ackles is the hottest guy on earth.” He rambled, quite obviously distracted by the internet.

“That makes sense. You look just like him. You should get some Jensen Ackles merchandise then. I’ll warn you that things are shockingly expensive on there, though.”

“It’s fine. That doesn’t look too expensive. I think he’ll like it.” He smiled. “Okie dokie. Could you chuck me my wallet from my jacket pocket?”

“Why are you still wearing you letterman jacket? It’s December.” She threw the wallet across and Dean pulled his credit card out.

“I only wear it occasionally and only outside of school. Apparently my boyfriend gets turned on when I’m wearing it.”

“Ew. Okay, when you’re done, give me my laptop back and I’ll put you onto the good site I know for DVDs.” Dean picked out a couple of DVDs. He’s managed to spend $28 and felt quite proud he’d managed to get so close to his target.

~~

Dean pulled up on his drive and looked up to his bedroom window. There was something weird. He jumped out the impala, ran through his front door and jogged upstairs. He slowly opened his door to find Cas sat at his desk. “You fucking freaked me out.”

“What? Why?”

“I saw a shadow through the window and thought someone had broken in.”

“I can assure you that I didn’t break in. Your mother let me in. She’s taken Sam to a friend’s. I figured we could just spend a lazy Sunday afternoon in your room.”

Dean nodded and pulled his boyfriend in for a hug. He led Cas over to the bed and laid down, pulling Cas down onto him. Cas rested his head on Dean’s chest.

“I bought your present today.” Dean muttered after a while.

“Yeah? Great. I bought yours the other day. I’m not very good at buying presents. I’m never sure what I want, let alone others. So I hope you like it.”

“I’m sure it’ll be great. If you can’t buy for you, how do you expect others to do it?” Dean kissed the top of Cas’ head.

“I’m sure I’ll love whatever it is that you’ve got me.”

“I hope so. I can’t wait to give it to you.” He giggled at his comment.

“What’s so funny?”

“Give it to you. You can’t tell me your head didn’t go there.” Cas shook his head. “Oh, my adorable innocent human, I love you.”

“I love you too. So, are you going to give it to me?“ Cas gave a cheeky grin.

“You said my mum and Sammy are out, right?”

“Yes.”

“Bring it on.” Dean quickly flipped over so Cas was underneath him.

“I was right.” Cas muttered between kisses.

“What do you mean?” Dean pulled off.

“When we first did this I said it’d always be special. Whether it was the first or hundredth time we did it. I’m never going to not get butterflies in my stomach when you flip me over”

“That’s good to know.”

Instead of exchanging any more words, Dean decided to kiss his boyfriend senseless. They quickly stripped each other down. 

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” Were the last words Cas remembered saying. Dean scooped under the rim of Cas’ boxers and stroked his boyfriend’s butt before pulling Cas’ boxers off and smiling about his Christmas present. He took off his own boxers and pulled the lube out of his bedside table. Considering they’d been dating for 75 days, they’d not slept together as much as would be expected and they’d still not taken that leap and fucked each other yet but Dean kept the lube nearby just in case. He rubbed some over his own dick and then Cas’ before putting the bottle back in the draw. He squirmed against his boyfriend’s erection and felt all his blood run to his dick as he groaned in pleasure.

Cas flipped them over, wanting to take control. Humping Dean was by far one of his favourite things to do. He knew he wouldn’t last long but he didn’t mind.

They heard a bang. “Dean, was that your mum?”

Dean grunted. “Yeah.” Cas was painfully hard but began to dismount. Dean grabbed his wrist. “Where the Hell are you going?”

“It’s bad enough doing it when Anna and Gabe are in the house. I really don’t feel comfortable doing it with your mother home.”

“I don’t care, Baby. You’ve turned me on so much I won’t allow you to stop humping me.”

“I can’t let your mum hear.”

“Hey! She won’t care. She’s heard me do it before. And, believe me, she hated that girl from the start. She knows I love you. She’ll approve. If you’re not comfortable, we’ll just have to keep the volume down or turn some music on.” He rolled over and grabbed his docking station remote and put some Queen on.

Cas looked down at his boyfriend’s twitching dick and climbed back on top. He started moving again and had to bury his face in Dean’s neck to stop himself letting out a huge groan of pleasure. It didn’t take long before Cas was groaning. “Dean, I’m going to-“ Cas didn’t manage to finish his sentence before he was shooting streams of white across their stomachs and biting down on Dean’s collar.

Dean followed suit and added to the large volume of come. “That. Was. Awesome.” He managed to verbalise. “You should take charge more often.”

Cas reached across and grabbed some tissues from the bedside table and wiped the stickiness away. “I’ll keep that in mind.” He kissed Dean’s forehead and pulled the duvet up over the top of both of them, shivering.

~

About quarter of an hour later, they dared to venture downstairs. “Hi, boys.”

“Hi, Mum. I was just introducing Cas to Queen. Can you believe he’d never heard Bohemian Rhapsody before?”

“I know what you were JUST doing, Dean Michael Winchester.” She smiled. “Go on, there’s some pie in the fridge.”

“We were counting on it.” He grabbed Cas’ hand and pulled him through to the kitchen. “See. I told you she wouldn’t care.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Over 1/3 of the way through now!


	13. ♫ You're here tonight. ♫

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2 or 3 years ago me really overused semi colons and capital letters. Funny to think I'm in a profession where correct grammar is vital now.

“I can’t believe you got accepted onto the team so quickly.” Cas said as his was laid next to Dean, playing on Sims. He’d just changed Dean’s Sim’s career from unemployed to athlete.

“Well, you better. You’re officially dating an athlete now.” Dean kissed his boyfriend’s temple. “It feels good to know that people don’t hate me for coming out the closet. Well, it would appear that Bela’s mad but that’s because we're both off the market now. Other than that, people have been accepting. It’s great, don’t you think?”

“It really is. Bela's jealous and I’m the only one lucky enough to have you. It's a win-win situation, really.”

“I’m not sure you should say you’re lucky to have me when I’m lucky to have you and you’re so much better than me.”

Cas laughed. “Agree to disagree?”

“Fine. I love you, you know that?”

“I do. I love you too.” Cas looked over to Dean’s letterman jacket laying on the edge of Dean’s bed. They’d decided to go to the Winchester’s for a change of scenery. “You know, I love your leather jacket but I think I love you in that letterman jacket even more. On Friday, come around straight after school, stuff the date. I want you in that jacket.” Cas felt turned on just thinking about it and had to remind himself that Sam was only separated from them by one wall and Mary was just downstairs.

Dean hummed in approval. “Sure thing, baby. Perhaps we could go on a date on Saturday instead?”

“Sounds great. Maybe a picnic by the lake?”

“Yes. In the evening, under the stars.”

“Are you finally getting all soppy on me, Winchester?” Cas mocked.

“I’m not getting soppy. I just think you’d like the romantic-ness of it. Am I correct?” The boy said defensively.

“You are but I know you’re doing this for you as well as me. You like the idea of a romantic date under the stars as much as I do and I love you for that.” Cas teased.

“Fine! Maybe I’m getting a romantic side, I’m not proud of it so leave me alone.”

“Hell no. I think it’s great that you’re gaining a romantic side. You’ve exceeded your alpha maleness for today and this is how you even it out. I think you should do sports more often for this reason. And you should also do it because the idea of hot and sweaty Dean kind of turns me on.” Cas winked.

“Well, I’ll be hot and sweaty a lot more from now on.”

“Awesome.” Cas rested for a minute. “You know, your bed’s really comfortable. Why don’t we stay here more often?”

“It’s nowhere near as comfortable as yours, Baby. Yours is bigger and squishier and contains you. I’m happy in yours.”

“You’ve pretty much stayed in it every night since we started dating. It’s more like ‘ours’ now.”

“I like the sound of that. Ours.” He repeated.

‘ _Ours’_  sounded perfect.

~

Dean sat in English the following day, half-heartedly writing notes as his hand found Cas’ thigh. Cas tensed under the surprising pressure that snapped him out of his English trance. Dean’s hand stroked up his boyfriend's thigh, getting closer to his cock. “Nuhuh, not here.” Cas warned, still in shock.

“Don’t know what you’re talking about.” Dean laughed.

“Dean.” Cas warned.

“So sexy when you’re angry.” He laughed again.

“Just keep working. We can sort out your sexual needs later.” Cas looked unamused, looking back up to the board as the end of his pen joined his perfect, plump lips. Dean released a sigh and went back to writing.

~

Later that day, whilst they were sat in Chemistry, Dean looked at his boyfriend from across the room and his eyes followed the pen sliding slowly in and out of Cas’ mouth, dick growing increasingly hard.  _Fucks sake, his blue-eyed angel was hot_.

As soon as the lesson ended, Dean fled quickly from the room, standing outside of the door, waiting for his boyfriend to leave. The minute Cas was within reaching distance, Dean found himself pulling him, by the arm, swiftly towards the toilets. He walked in and pushed Cas into one of the cubicles. “Fuck, need you so bad, baby.” He whispered once he’d checked that there was no one else in the other cubicles.

“Not at school, Dean. Anywhere but here.”

“You have no idea what you’ve been doing to me all day, have you?”

“No.”

“The tongue action on that pen. You really don’t know you’re doing it?” Cas just innocently shook his head. “My dick is actually envious of the pen. Seriously, I need you.”

“No. Dean, really. No.”

“But it’s lunch. It’s not like we have anywhere to be.”

“Dean, this is the last time I’m going to say this: not here. Let’s just go and eat.” Cas went for the cubicle lock and exited.

Dean followed his boyfriend to the cafeteria and sat down at their usual table. Cas seemed to eat everything in a more seductive way, maybe Dean was just imagining it. The fries he was eating appeared to elegantly glide into his mouth as he closed his salty lips around them, licking them every so often.

Dean leant towards his boyfriend and whispered “Impala, now.” quietly into his ear before standing up and walking off. Cas gulped and turned to Chuck and Benny.

“We got some work to do in the library. We’ll see you guys later.”

~

“Dean, I said no sex at school.” Cas growled as he approached the taller boy leaning against the car.

“But you came anyway.” Dean added cockily.

“I couldn’t just leave you, could I?” Cas raised an eyebrow.

“Backseat, baby.”

They sat side by side on the backseat as Dean pulled off his jacket, Cas did the same. It wasn’t long before they were kissing. Dean reached for his belt and zipper and pushed his jeans to his knees. Cas did the same. They began to stroke themselves. “I love you.” Dean muttered against Cas’ lips.

“I know.” Cas laughed back. “How about you show me how much by way of an apology of making me have sex at school.”

Dean quickly left Cas’ mouth as his lips joined his boyfriend's dripping cock. “Yummy.” He laughed.

Cas’ hand rose up the back of Dean's shirt and stroked softly to the same rhythm that Dean’s head was moving to. Dean’s hand found Cas’ balls and he rubbed them softly. Cas’ whole body clenched. “Fuck, Dean.”

“If you want.” Dean pulled off and smiled.

“Just finish the damn blowjob.”

Dean’s lips joined his shaft again, slow movements of the head making is boyfriend groan louder. He pulled off with a loud pop. “You like that, baby?” It came out as a statement, not a question.

“Dean.” Cas warned. “Your lips should be doing something other than talking.”

After he resumed the blowjob, it didn’t take long for Cas the squirt into his mouth.

Cas reached across and took Dean’s own dick into his hand, stroking as fast as he could. “Ah, fuck.” Dean groaned, rubbing his head in the crook of his boyfriend’s neck.

~

Friday came around and it was Dean’s first game. It was an away game about 50 miles away from their school. Instead of going on the bus, like the rest of the team, Dean decided to take the impala him so he could ride there with Cas.

“Dean.”

“Yeah, Baby.”

“Why are you driving instead of taking the bus? I could have got a lift with Gabe.”

“So I could spend 50 miles in my baby with my baby.” He cringed at how lame that was. “I apologise. That was way too cheesy, even for me. Anyway, there’s another reason. I’ll tell you later.”

“Aw, come on.”

“Okay. If we take the bus, we have to leave at a certain time. We don’t get any freedom. I don’t want to go home straight away. I have a plan.”

“Which is?”

“That’s classified.”

“I hate you, Dean Winchester.”

“Nah you don’t. You love me Castiel Novak.” He leant over and kissed his boyfriend’s temple. Cas scooted a little closer to Dean.

~

After the game finished, Cas rushed away from Gabe to wait outside the locker room for Dean to come out. He thought back to his earlier comment, ‘Don’t you dare shower’ and smiled to himself. When Dean emerged from the changing room his hair was still sweaty, he’d changed from his uniform but he was wearing his jacket. Cas wanted to rip it off him there and then but quickly realised just imagining it was making him hard. “Have you said goodbye to the team?”

“I have. Ready to go?”

“Desperately.” Cas winked. “Where are we going?”

“We’ll be there in about 10 minutes. You’ll find out pretty soon.” They got into the impala. Cas tried to stop himself from looking at his boyfriend so he wouldn’t get any more turned on. “Okay. Close your eyes.” Dean ordered after about 8 minutes in the car.

“Why?”

“Just do it.” Dean gave him a playful punch on the arm.

“Fine.” Cas closed his eyes. He heard Dean pull off the main road and park up.

“Alright, open them.” Cas opened his eyes to see a hotel in front of him.

“Why are we here Dean?” Cas smiled.

“You have a thing for my jacket. So, we can have fun with something you’re into. And I have this thing for drunk hotel sex. Obviously, you’re not allowed to be drunk. I’ll allow you to have one beer, maximum. I thought maybe we could have fun with something I’m into too. Unless that’d make you feel uncomfortable? We could just sleep or I could just drive you home.” He went to start the engine.

“Don’t. You. Dare. Dean Winchester. Come on.” He pulled himself out of the car and met Dean’s hand by the time he got to the hood.

“I was hoping you’d say that.” Dean pulled him in for an intense kiss. “Then, lead the way, baby.” Cas dragged Dean, as fast as he could, desperate to get him inside their room.

“Wait. You said drunk. We’re not drunk.”

“Well, we better hit the bar first then.”

“You’re killing me. Does it have to be drunk?”

“It doesn’t HAVE to be but I’d prefer it if it was.”

“Okay. Anything for you.”

~

Dean went to the desk to check in as he pushed Cas in the direction of the bar. He collected the key and headed through to find his boyfriend. Cas was sat in the booth closest to the door.

“Why don’t we go a bit further in and get a bit more privacy?” Dean approached.

“I like it here because we’re close to the door and can escape fast as soon as you’re drunk enough.”

“I don’t think an extra few metres would make a great deal of difference when leaving. What’s the rush anyway?”

Cas leant towards Dean and whispered, “I’ve been so turned on since you left the locker room after the game. I need you.”

“Wow. Okay, just a few drinks then?”

“Sure.”

Dean went over to order a couple of beers and shots, which he downed before leaving the bar. When he returned to the booth, he sat as close to his boyfriend as possible. “Do you think you should call Gabe or Anna?”

“I texted Anna whilst we were in the car to tell her I wouldn’t be back as early as expected. I guess I should tell her I’ll see her tomorrow.” He got his phone out. “I’m not sure I’d live it down if I told Gabe where we are tonight.”

“Why can’t you tell Gabe?”

“You know him. He’d find a reason to tease us.”

“I’m not sure it’s something we should hide from him. We won’t be ABLE to hide it from him. We sleep in the same house, remember?”

“I know. It’ll just buy us a little more time. If he finds out we’re here he could drive over and ruin it for us. I just want it to be special.”

“Okay.” He handed Cas a bottle. “Now, drink up.”

~

When they got up to their room, neither man was drunk. They were just a little ‘tipsy’, Dean more so than his boyfriend. He had vowed to keep them sober enough for them to remember the night they were yet to enjoy. And vowed to never let Cas get drunk ever again.

Cas pushed his boyfriend into the door with a thud and kissed him feverishly. Finally he could pull Dean close enough to smell the vague hint of sweat still painted across his boyfriend’s neck. He walked slowly backwards into the room, holding Dean’s hand and pulling him towards the bed. He turned around to inspect the room for the first time. It was nothing fancy but it was sweet enough and it didn’t need to be fancy for what they had planned for the night.

Cas fell down onto the bed and pulled Dean down on top of him. Though they slept together every night, they’d only actually ‘slept together’ on two occasions. This meant that that night was special. Dean pulled up so he could strip Cas of his jacket, shoes and socks. He dropped them onto the floor and began to take his own jacket off. Cas stopped him. “Keep the jacket on.” He ordered.

“It’s too hot. Maybe you should wear it.” Dean winked. He pulled his boyfriend up and removed his t-shirt. He took his letterman jacket off and undid his shirt. He handed his jacket to Cas but he refuse to take it.

“It needs to be on you.”

Dean pulled it over his bare skin – maybe he wouldn’t overheat like this – and sunk back down to kiss Cas. “This any better?”

“It’s the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.” He said as he stroked Dean’s striking six pack on display. He pulled Dean down so he was no longer crouched above his and was, instead, laid flat on top of him. He rolled over so Dean was underneath him and he could take control. In their other - granted infrequent - times, Dean had dominated in the bedroom so Cas felt good taking control. “Did you bring the lube?” Cas felt dirty saying the word ‘lube’ but Dean had previously mocked him for saying ‘lubricant’ instead.

“Yeah, it’s in my bag.” Dean gestured towards his kit bag. Cas dismounted and walked across the room.

“It’s your turn tonight. We focused on me last time and you were truly amazing. It’s my turn to rock YOUR world.” He undid Dean’s belt and pulled off his jeans before climbing back on top of his boyfriend. Once again smiling as he saw Dean’s underwear. They had taken to just sleeping in boxers now every night but every time Cas saw Dean’s he couldn’t help but smile or tease.

Cas got a hum of approval when he lowered back down to kiss him. He put the lube on the bed next to them and intertwined his fingers with Dean’s as they kissed: long and hard. Cas eventually unlinked their fingers and moved his hands slowly and seductively down Dean’s sides and under the waistband of his Superman boxers. They parted lips when Dean realised Cas still had his jeans on and he HAD to make Cas as exposed as him. Cas didn’t object when Dean went for his belt and signalled Cas should pull them down.

“Just because I’m taking me jeans off, doesn’t mean you have to please me, okay? This is all for you, capiche?”

“You sure? You seem pretty turned on.”

“I’ll probably come just watching you.” Cas laughed.

Dean nodded and Cas pulled down his boyfriend’s boxers and crouched over Dean’s dick.

He circled the underside of the head with his tongue and licked down the large vein underneath; he slipped his hand down and massaged Dean’s balls before moving further back and rubbing the pad of his thumb around his entrance.

Dean noticed the loss of contact and opened his eyes to find out what happened and saw Cas coating his right hand in the cool, slimy gel. He received a soft smile before Cas leant back down to kiss just above his dick. He felt Cas’ perfect fingers circle the rim of his ass again and dip inside.

Dean was all warm inside. That was all Cas could think about as he pushed his finger inside slowly. “Tell me if it hurts or anything. Tell me what I can do to get better. I want this to be as pleasurable to you as possible.”

“Will do, baby. You’re doing great already. I can’t wait to suck you off later.” Dean panted.

“You’re not going to, this is YOUR night.”

“We’ll see.” He paused to sigh at the joy he could feel due to Cas finger. “You can use two.” Cas inserted a second finger and reached inside further, pressing his fingers around to find that all important spot. When Dean’s hips flew up he knew he’d found it.

“Oh my God, Cas.” He writhed with contentment. Cas kept moving. Now he’d found the spot he moved his fingers repeatedly as Dean groaned.

“Where do you want my lips, Dean? Up there with yours or down here?”

“Come up here.” Dean growled. Cas moved up the best he could whilst keeping his fingers inside Dean. He dove down to consume his boyfriend’s mouth and muffle the groans (which he was sure the people in the adjoining room could hear). When Dean said “Cas, I’m gunna-“ Cas moved back down to his boyfriend’s dick to catch the strings of come Dean was about to release in his mouth. Cas’ name was all that was on Dean’s lips. “Castiel, Castiel, CAS-TI-EL.” He climaxed.

“Castiel?”

Dean groaned, unable to talk properly. “Felt right.”

“I quite like it. No one calls me Castiel and no one else gets me in the bedroom, it seems right, yes.” He leant up so they could kiss again. Dean had decided a while ago that, when in Cas’ mouth, he liked the taste of his own come. In the years previous, when he’d been with girls, he didn’t like it. He even refused to kiss after a blow job sometimes. But in Castiel’s mouth, it tasted delicious.

“I think I need a shower.” Dean hummed in his half dead state.

“Why? I swallowed it all.” Cas said proudly.

“I’ve added to the sweat from the game.”

Cas looked at Dean’s jacket. “I like you like that.”

“I love that you like me like this but I’m feeling all dirty.” He pulled himself up. “Care to join me in there?”

“Sure.” He got up and Dean pulled his across to the bathroom. The shower was NOT made for 2 people so shower sex was tricky. Consequently, neither of them came whilst in there. That wasn’t something new though. They’d showered together many mornings before school and only made out. The thing Cas loved about their relationship was that Dean didn’t always want sex. He loved that he turned Dean on but he felt respect through the fact that Dean was okay just standing and kissing under the warm spray.

Dean was well aware that Cas hadn’t come yet and he REALLY needed to change that. As they climbed out, they made a pathetic attempt at drying themselves and headed back to the bedroom. Cas wasn’t sure what the plan of action was now but just agreed to be led to the bed by his boyfriend. When he shivered, Dean pulled his letterman jacket around Cas’ shoulders and used it to yank him in for a warm kiss.

“Your turn, Baby.”

“No, it’s fine. This was for you.”

“If you’re sure?”

“I’m sure. I also believe I promised you a blowjob with a twist.” He winked.

“That doesn’t matter now. Perhaps some other time. I was thinking that, if you’re going to keep being stubborn and not let me rock your world, we could watch ‘My Bloody Valentine’. It’s a horror but Jensen Ackles is MIGHTY fine.”

“I’m not a horror fan, Dean. I’m ashamed to say I get scared pretty easily.”

“I was counting on it. It gives me an excuse to cuddle up to you.” He walked over to his bag and pulled out the DVD.

“You don’t need an excuse. We do it every night.” Cas stated the obvious.

“That’s a valid point. Can we watch anyway? It’s not too scary.”

“Sure.”

~

“You’re right. I think Jensen Ackles is probably the most attractive man in the world.” Cas admitted as the movie came to an end. They’d started off just lying together and holding hands but since the third death Cas had been scrunched closely to Dean’s side with a protective arm swathed around him. “He’s hotter than Hugh Jackman, Chris Hemsworth and Paul Walker combined.”

Dean gave a not very subtle, subtle cough.

“Dean, you look EXACTLY like him.” He said truthfully. Dean looked old for his age anyway, in a few years he’d probably look identical. “I’m not even joking. By the time you finish collage you could be his stunt double in films. Not that I’m going to let you do anything that risky.” He leant up and kissed him.

“You really think we’ll still be together by the end of collage?”

Cas’ heart sunk. He’d assumed Dean would feel the same way about staying together as he did. What if he didn’t? “Erm, well, I’d hope so.” Cas admitted. “That doesn’t scare you, does it? It’s not going to freak you out or push you away from me, is it?” He panicked... a lot.

“HEY! Calm down.” Dean managed to settle Cas. “I’d like to think we’d still be together. I know it’ll be tricky to work stuff out once we finish high school so I wasn’t sure you’d want to have to put the effort in.” Dean said timidly.

“I will if you will.” Cas said lovingly and sweetly back to his boyfriend.

“Then you have to,” Dean paused “because I plan to.”

“I love you, Dean. You know that, right?”

“I do. I love you too, Cas.” With that, they fell into a deep, comfortable sleep together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've not yet said thanks to the people that read this 2/3 years ago and have come back to it. Nor have I said hello to new readers. So, yeah, thanks and hello. I hope you enjoy my terrible old writing.

**Author's Note:**

> Please stick around.  
> And you can find me [here](http://kind-of-a-lot.tumblr.com/) on tumblr.


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